Learn to let things you cannot control, go.

I actually don’t think that this time last year I would have thought that over the next year I would be hiding my arms and legs from everyone around me, taking an array of illegal substances to feel euphoric or at the end of it all, have fallen in love with my best friend who would end up proving me wrong.

I wouldn’t be able to put my finger on the countless times that I put my neck out, in order to protect his. The times I would give him everything, the last of what I had even, The times I would do anything just to see him happy, and just to watch him get from place to place with ease. 

I don’t want anything out of this text post, I don’t expect him to come back or to realise that he has completely destroyed someone who put him before they put themselves, I'm just writing this because I personally need to get it off my chest.

I really don’t have anyone who I can sit down and discuss all of this with, simply because the people I did have, are all involved with him. They may approach you in a differing way, but their motives will always remain.

I will never be able to put my finger on what it is that I hold, and it may even be nothing, but to be able to foresee things in dreams and visions at night, then to watch them happen around you is truly something.

To be able to see things, one step ahead of everyone else, and to have very few people believe you is another thing.

Out of everything that has gone on during the past year since I first laid eyes on him, I have had the best time of my life, but then again I now realise that I am stuck in the hole in which he had first put himself into.

I need something or someone better.

There is someone better.

I wish him the best, because no matter how many broken promises he tries to sell to me, and everything that is sugar - coated, I will never be able to see past the fact of what he has done to me.

I just need to take this to the next step of letting it go, letting him go, and letting everything to do with him go because it is only weighing me down, and all of the potential and good karma I have within me. 

Learn to let things you cannot control, go.