My body is the enemy.
Which makes every ache and pain
potential warning for the next
big assault on my peace of mind–
see, there is probably nothing wrong with me.
But that’s not what it feels like.
I have been through enough of the battles
to be terrified of the war, and it’s hard to tell
pulled muscles from warning signs.
After everything it has done to me, I expect
nothing less than mutiny from my body.
I don’t know how to take things casually:
everything is a symptom of a worse disease.
I come from a long line of heart problems
and broken backs and breast cancer and
some days I feel like ticking time bomb
wrapped in skin and I pick myself apart
waiting to detonate. Understand,
that there is never a moment when
I am not in some kind of pain.
I hear that’s not exactly normal,
but it’s normal for me. I click
like ungreased clockwork,
spent last summer in and out of
hospitals and doctor’s offices
trying to fix a problem that took
five different specialists to even name.
A lot of the time, my body feels less
like something that belongs to me and
more like something that is happening to me
and there is nothing I can do to slow it down.
So I am afraid.
I am always afraid.
But maybe it’s just me.
—  HYPOCHONDRIAC by Ashe Vernon (13/30)

ogteamarrow asked:

Man are you LL fans salty! LOL it's so laughable how you cry that she doesn't get anything when she took over the whole season while Digg and Felicity stories were pushed to the side to compensate for Boo Boo Canary. I understand that she's your character and that it must hurt that only the people who mattered went with Oliver to save Thea and the Olicity sex had to burn so I get the frustration but I think the energy should be focused on hoping for Laurel to finally become compelling or likable

LOL, this is a fun one, first time I got some hate mail. Tell me when exactly Laurel took over the whole season, because if you look at the screen time, I’m pretty sure Laurel is still way behind Felicity and also behind Diggle, I know for sure after the first half Laurel had less screen time than both of them and even Roy, because someone here was keeping score.  And in the last two episodes didn’t even get 5 minutes of screen time combined. Oh, by “taking over the season” do you mean gets more than five minutes of screen time, which happened in a handful of episodes? 

If ANYONE is taking over the season, it’s Felicity, who not only has #2 screen time after Oliver (beating Diggle, Roy and Laurel by a mile) but also has substantial screen time on the Flash when she visits. And with all that screen time, you think it’s Laurel that’s taking away time for her story? No, it’s the writers who can shoe-horn her into as many scenes as they can, but for some reason are incapable of giving her a story line that isn’t about being a love interest or superhero guru. Blame the writers for that.

Diggle has been marginalized since S2, way before Laurel joined the team, but I’m sure you weren’t complaining then. Fact is, they took the “Oliver’s conscience” role he had in S1 and gave it to Felicity, they gave Felicity any tech stuff and the writers chose not to have Diggle be part of the action for some reason. He hasn’t been really part of the action since S2 when Roy became Oliver’s sidekick. Is it Roy’s fault Diggle has been sidelined other than Suicide Squad stories? No, it’s once again the writers who can’t write a story line that services all their characters and can’t figure out what to do with Diggle. They could have him in the field, they could have him investigate HIVE, they could give him a story line with Lyla or invent one, but they don’t, because they’re lazy and don’t care about their characters and giving them the development and story lines they deserve.

And ‘Boo Boo Canary’? That’s laughable considering all Felicity has done this season is cry, while Laurel took her grief and anger and channeled it towards getting justice and protecting her city, even when Felicity, Roy and Diggle wanted to quit. 

‘Only people who matter’ or ‘only people you care about’? And I couldn’t care less about the Olicity sex scene, because I don’t care who gets Oliver’s magic dick, in fact I don’t want Laurel to get together with him, because he’s a douche-bag who treats the women in his life appallingly and that includes Felicity. Felicity would have been better off with Ray, but he’s too good for this show and deserves better than the way the show has treated him. 

And Laurel deserves better than Oliver, but right now she’s too busy saving the city to care about a love life and unlike Oliver, she doesn’t need constant reminding for why she should even bother, because Laurel has been a hero since day one- she’s always fought for justice and put her life in danger trying to get it, she didn’t need to be tortured on an island to stop being a selfish asshole and start thinking of other people and even then it took Laurel, Diggle and Felicity to get him to stop just going after the people on his father’s list but also do good and it took Tommy dying for Oliver to stop being a killer and become The Arrow. 

Trust me, enough people find Laurel plenty of likable and compelling and cite her Canary arc as one of the bright spots in this dreary season. I didn’t like her in S1, but I came around in S2 when the writers and fandom did nothing but shit on the character and actress and by defending her I realized what a strong character she is and she’s one of the few characters outside of Oliver that even gets any character development. And you can keep hating her and people like Quentin and Oliver can keep belittling her and calling her an addict or telling her she’s not a hero, but Laurel’s strong and she’s gonna keep going, she’s gonna be a better fighter and become the hero she was always meant to be. 

I’m the one that’s salty? You got everything you probably wanted this episode/this season and you still come to my blog, where I didn’t tag your precious character or ship in order to both gloat and complain. You don’t like what I’m saying, go to your own tags where I’m sure you’ll find like-minded people who worship a plastic plant and probably replay that sex scene a million times. Have fun, enjoy yourself and most importantly- get off my lawn. I don’t come into your tags and your blogs and ridicule you, but then again, I’m an actual adult that respects other people’s opinions and right to enjoy whatever the hell they want to.


Three Times The Charm

Title: Three Times The Charm
Fandom: Flash and Arrow
Pairing: Blackvibe (Laurel Lance x Cisco Ramon)
Rating: T, for language
Word Count: 2816
Summary: Three times Cisco Ramon speaks about his relationship with Laurel Lance to his friends and family after getting caught together in less than platonic circumstances.
Author’s Comments: asdfas I DON’T KNOW WHERE I WENT WITH THIS, but please enjoy. This hasn’t been beta’d.
Tagging: olicittys, barriyallen, smoakswans, smoakamell, redpendreaming, lieutenantsmoak, someday-makes-me-sad, oliversjonas
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The first time after he meets Laurel Lance, he doesn’t know what to make of it. It’s something otherworldly, being able to meet one of his heroes, and have it be so unexpectedly wonderful. When she hands him over the sonic device, it vibrates in his hand and an idea enters his mind. He tells her that he’ll take care of it, of course because he always does, and that’d it’d be an easy work up. He has to go out with Joe and her father first, but that can’t take all but three hours out of his day, right?

“Thank you, Cisco. I don’t know how to repay you”, she tells him before giving him another wide smile, a smile that he deems so unearthly bright and shining that he can’t help but smile at her in return and nods his reply. He just pockets the device and follows her out of the interrogation room.

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kataiki asked:

So what was the difference between the pre-retcon meteor and post-retcon meteor that resulted in Dave/Karkat? As far as I can tell, Vriska mostly left them alone. Did Davekat exist in both realities? Or is this some butterfly effect thing?

Terezi got a bit closer to Vriska, rather than Dave taking a try at a relationship with her despite having his trust in her violated by a dead offshoot Dave earlier during his session.

I’d also imagine that having Vriska to pal around with – and having learned a version of her “justice means doing away with people you really wish would live, for the safety of everyone” lesson that was MUCH less harsh this time around – might’ve kept Terezi’s tendency to make morbid jokes and use a teasingly threatening attitude flourishing. Dave was never really a fan of that side of her personality, and much less so after she’d actually killed him once.

(EDIT: A friend (volatileleporegina) just pointed out to me that John’s messages – that Terezi wasn’t going to have a very good time pairing with either Karkat or Dave – might have played a small part in how she didn’t seem to go for either of them! I don’t think it’s a huge factor, but I guess one tends to listen to future advice a bit, even if it’s from someone who clearly doesn’t know what they’re doing.)

‘I love peaches,’ I say.
You say, 'I know.’

Each time you say, 'I know,’
I learn the parts of me I found
important enough to tell you
more than once.

The parts of me that take
up too much space, too many breaths,
the parts of me that should need less
but don’t. Peaches—

I love you more than peaches
for all the times I’ve said it.
That must be important.

You remind me that
though you howl for me
like I’m the moon,

the moon has a dark side
and even it can learn
to take up more space.

My werewolf girl, you let me take
up most of the bed and your body.
I lay on you in the pale darkness,
thinking about our pillow talk,
philosophies of perception.

I exist without you knowing me.
If you had never known me,
I would still be here,
in this bedroom,
nearly sleeping.

Someone once asked me,
'How can you love without losing

I finally have the answer,
it came to me through the open winter window
after you’d thrown off all the blankets,
when we were too warm and needed to take up
too much space.

A love like this you don’t lose
yourself in; you don’t become small,
like a wallet or a door key or a promise.

A love like this tastes like peaches
and only gardens you larger, takes
your soil and tends to it with water
and sunlight songs and knows
when to leave you quiet.

Love reminds you who you are
when no one else is looking.


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Printing by Mama’s Sauce

This is a highly targeted direct mail piece that is built around the stresses that come with winning a government award. We came up with the idea when our client was telling us, if he could just take his potential clients to dinner, he feels he could land them 100% of the time. Although this direct mail has a high per-piece price tag, it conveys his brand and expertise in a less expensive option than flying all over the country to wine and dine potential clients.

anonymous asked:

Does Internet Dad give relationship advice? Cause I really need some...

Well, I suppose I could take a swing, though I haven’t been in a relationship in a while. But the thing is, having spent a long time reading agony aunts as a child, I can tell you right up front that there are basically two responses to almost any romantic relationship question:

1. Pony up and talk to your partner(s) about the aspect of the relationship that is bothering you; yes, it will be unpleasant, and on occasion it may end the relationship, but it will be far less unpleasant than letting the issue fester. 

2. You are in an abusive relationship. Leave your partner(s) as soon as you possibly can. 

(There is a rare 3. I’m sure you do feel awful about [thing you did] but will telling your partner(s) be better for them, or will it just make you feel better?)

Like, there are exceptions to the rule, but by and large, you’re gonna get a version of one of the above. :D But sure, if you want, lay it on me. Though I do have a backlog right now so it may be a few days before I respond. 

I slept for over ten hours last night! All this school stuff these past weeks really made me tired. As planned, I went running this morning. I’m not as unfit as I thought I was - I ran around the block two times instead of the planned one time (always take it easy when you are just starting), and wasn’t too out of breath. I decided I wouldn’t measure my running in minutes or in kilometers for the moment, but in runs around the block, because it creates less pressure, and no one here can tell how big my block is, so I’m escaping everybody’s judgement :p

I realised that my legs have gotten even more crooked than they already were… I can barely put my feet down straight, and I make a ridiculous swinging movement as I run because my knees go in opposite directions. Well, I don’t care. I should swim or cycle though, it would be better for my poor legs.

Frustrated. Not a giant squid.

I can’t make my body do what I need it to do.

I feel trapped a lot of the time.

Worse, the people who take care of me have let me get into the mess I got into with meds.

They put me at the center of my life. Which sounds wonderful in theory.

But imagine you’re sitting at the center of a moving kaleidoscope of sensations. Can’t make sense of more than a little. Can control even less.

They tell you how smart you are. Think they’re complimenting you.

You only have two hands.

You only have two hands.

And your species expects at least fifty if not a hundred hands and a brain multitask enough to work them all at once.

You have ten fingers two hands lucky if you can work them all at once in coordination.

They set you at the center of a life-controlling device designed for fifty to a hundred hands and the brain to match.

Your two hands and mono track brain can barely keep you alive. No matter how “smart” you are.

You see a catastrophe coming months away. But to tell anyone, you’d have to take your two hands off the life support system. So you don’t. They wonder why you cry and get more and more agitated.

I’m not a fucking octopus. I’ll never be able to even simulate being an octopus.

I’m scared though I told everyone during this latest crisis I’m not an octopus I can’t be at the center of the machine any longer. And I doubt very much that any of the ones with real power knew what I meant. It’s only those front line staff who see me struggle day to day who have even half a clue and they have almost as little power as I do.

I want help. I want everyone with lots of arms to lend me their arms instead of saying I’m smart enough to turn two arms into fifty. Which has nothing to do with smart.

…And she tells herself, “No, no, he couldn’t have been trying to impress me. That’s ridiculous. Why would he feel the need? Perhaps he’s intimidated by me?”

Then she starts to notice almost every time Sebastian makes a perfect shot, he looks right at her with such happiness and intent in his eyes one could almost see the tail wagging.

And she just thinks, “Oh no,”.

anonymous asked:

should i tell my ex i still have feelings for him or not and just hold my feelings in ?

how long is it since you’ve been broken up? because if it’s less than 6 months, i wouldn’t tell him. Getting over someone takes a long time, but if you still want t try and continue something with him, then maybe tell him? i really don’t know, sorry

Dissertation feelz :(
  • Me:*finishes dissertation super early so I have lots of time to edit it and make it perfect*
  • Dissertation Supervisor:*gives me no help*
  • Dissertation Supervisor:*gives me no feedback*
  • Dissertation Supervisor:*takes forever to read my draft*
  • Me:Hi please could I have some feedback on the draft I sent you weeks ago? My health is bad and I can't rely on it so I would really appreciate it soon thanks.
  • Dissertation Supervisor:*still doesn't get back to me*
  • Less than week and a half before the deadline
  • Dissertation Supervisor:Hi can you come and see me next Wednesday about your dissertation please?
  • Me:What that's like less than a week before the deadline
  • Dissertation Supervisor:Come and see me tho 4 feedback
  • Me:*stress stress stress stress stress STRESSSTRESSSTRESSSTRESSSSSS*
The ‘Defenders’

Fool me once…shame on you…fool me twice…shame on me….fool me five hundred fucking times? Clearly i either know what the fuck is going on and i accept it….or i’m just a plain dunce. If a nigga cheats on you and puts you on BLAST in the public eye yet you take him back less than 3 weeks later…you can’t tell me shit. And for all you women defending her saying “I’m sure all of yall had that bf who” or the classic “half of yall WISHED you look like her”…lemme tell you this. I’d rather be ugly as fuck with a solid head on my body than pretty with the title of village idiot or leech. I don’t normally bash women but for every time that chick got dissed and cheated on then ran back with little to no effort from Mr. Brown…i think i should be allowed a moment to laugh real hard. I had a mother and enough common sense to notice that when you allow people to treat you like shit the second time…thats yo mofuckin cue to GO. So use her as your role model…i’ll be laughing at yall hard too. Smh.

I’m having a tough time in life and decided to take time off to love myself.
Now loving myself means cutting off men, dates, sex buddies and suitors which I was more than happy to do.
But I find the more I tell these guys I’m not interested, the more I read and ignore messages, the more calls I send to voicemail and the worse my attitude gets, the more intense they are and the less willing they are to let me go.
I know this seems like a rant where I’m hailing myself (I’m not it’s not anything new for a nigga to want me) but I can’t take anymore surprise visits and invitations. I really fuckin can’t and I would really just love to be left alone.

Season end Demon's head

We might end the Season with Nyssa being the Demon’s head - her rightful place. Oliver/Dig/Felicity/Thea/Laurel/(maaaybe Tatsu?) will help her get there.

- Time will only tell, hun! I think there is certainly a strong possibility that Nyssa will take her rightful place. We are less than a month from finding out for sure!


so it’s not bc i don’t care about this bc of course i do. Tao is the heart & soul of Exo so of course I care one way or the other. but this is the third time going through this in less than a year.

So above all else, I just need to know what’s happening. Whatever it is, good, heartbreaking or nothing at all, I just need someone to come out & tell me what’s going to happen bc I can’t take it anymore. 

I can’t take the weeks of speculation, the back & forth promises, constantly being assured that everything is okay and then the next second, questioning everything, bc you can never really trust anything that sm says so? I can’t take having to dig into the depths of the Internet, looking for any posts, any translations that could possibly give me answers, even tho the answers are probably going to crush me. I can’t take being so utterly devastated but being so in my head about it bc it’s not like I can actually talk to anyone about this, oh I’m upset bc Tao left Exo, hahaha? I can’t take making myself physically I’ll about this anymore.

So Tao, SM, someone, please just tell us straight out what is going on because I think I can handle it now. What I can’t handle is the not knowing.

@staff please please please stop doing the thing where posts made by ‘suggested blogs" show up on your dash. I’ve seen posts from white supremacist blogs THREE times in less than two days and it’s really fucking upsetting. Clearly whatever computer program you use to suggest blogs can’t tell the difference between “black lives matter” and “Michael Brown was a nigger and fucking deserved it.” I’m at a place in my life where most of the time I can take a deep breath and ignore it but I can’t be the only person this is happening to, and one of these days someone is going to see a white supremacist or rape apologist post and have a goddamn panic attack.

              監視官 常守朱
Crime Coefficient: 44.2

Okay, so it is like this. Makishima had not been shot by
Kogami and was able to escape. I ended up finding him
and to keep him in one place tried to annoy him by calling
him a jerk; since he is more sensitive to trivial insults, and
probably was insulted that I didn’t take him seriously
(hence the lame insult). It worked and he was annoyed that
I was wasting his time. Really it was to stall him, but it
became a discussion over his actions. 

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