the signs as fucking toilet paper

aries: angel soft

taurus: charmin ultra soft

gemini: charmin BASIC (AS HELL)

cancer: some shitty hotel shit brand

leo: quilted northern

virgo: the empty toilet paper roll of cardboard

libra: cashmere

scorpio: cottonelle

sagittarius: shitbegone

capricorn: scott

aquarius: a leaf

pisces: white cloud

James Potter, punching fourth year Severus Snape in the face in front of Lily Evans . Remus and Sirius being there too, and James can’t recall the exact string of insults Snape had spat at them, but he had called the three of them privileged. 

Lily being furious and James getting called to McGonagall’s office for the incident. 

James would be the first to admit that he is indeed, as Snape suggested, privileged. His family are well known, well respected and wealthy. James himself is confident and highly intelligent and he knows it. 

But Sirius has a surname that is a burden to him and a family that call him a blood-traitor and Remus goes through hell and back once a month and still manages to smile and laugh. Sirius wakes shaking from nightmares and asks quietly in the dark if James is awake while Remus pretends he’s not in pain the day after so that nobody worries about him. Sirius receives letters that make his hands tremble as he shreds them and Remus had a panic attack when they told him they knew his secret because he thought they were going to go public and get him kicked out of school. 

Snape can call him whatever he likes, but he does not get to call Sirius and Remus privileged, James won’t stand for it. 

He says as much to McGonagall who spends a long time staring hard at him.

Eventually she tells him he needs to write an extra 15 inches on his transfiguration homework and dismisses him without detention.