a/n: I wrote this a few weeks back and forgot about it until today and I really wanted to get it up. I hope you guys like it!
After Ashton and I broke up I was numb. When he told me he
was going on tour I knew it was over. It was once he said those exact words
that I felt everything crumble around me.
He refused to meet my eyes, it was like he was afraid of my
“The lease you could do is look at me while you break my
heart, Ashton.” I snapped, tears pooling in my eyes.
“We both knew this wasn’t going to last forever.”
“That’s not what I said, Ashton. Just be a man and look me in
the eyes. Tell me to my face, not your feet.”
He didn’t. Instead he walked away. I wanted to hate him but
there was no point. It was going to get me nowhere and just hurt more.
Six months go by and I was content again. I knew that Ashton
was living out his dream and I was still discovering my own.
“Y/N, what are you doing tonight?” My roommate asked as I
walked through the door, returning from my morning shift at work.
“I was just going to catch up on some reading. Why?”
“I got backstage passes for a concert I’m reviewing tonight.
Come with me.”
“5 Seconds of Summer.”
“Oh, um, sure I guess.”
There was no reason to let the break up with Ashton stop me
from living life and helping a friend out.
“I know that you and Ashton used to—” She started.
“No, hey, it’s fine. We’re both adults. Besides, friends
“You’re seriously the best.” She hugged me.
To be honest, I was a little excited to see the show. I did
always enjoy watching him and the others perform. It had always brought a smile
to my face seeing their faces all light up with happiness as they lost
themselves in their music.
Pushing our way through the large group of screaming girls
was almost impossible. They were so desperate to get even a glance at their
favorite band. Showing security at the door our passes, they quickly pushed us
in while trying to keep the screaming girls out.
“So when does the show start?” I asked as we began to wonder
“I think in about an hour.”
“I need to use the restroom, I’ll be right back. Text me if
you leave this general area.”
It was a struggle to find where the bathroom was. It felt
like at every turn I was just going in circles.
Finding my way back to Y/F/N was even harder. I was just about to give
up when I heard her laughing. There was a large part of me that wasn’t
surprised to see her standing there with none other than Ashton Irwin.
“Y/N, finally, there you are. What took so long?” She smiled,
turning toward me.
“Sorry, I got a little lost,” I smiled softly. “Hi, Ashton.”
I added politely.
“How are you?”
“Uh, I’m fine. You know, tired.” He scratched the back of his
neck with his drumstick.
“I bet. I can’t imagine being on the road like that.”
It was clear as day that Ashton was uncomfortable.
“Well, we should let you get ready for the show. It was good
to see you. Good luck.”
I gently took hold of Y/F/N arm and brought her closer to the
“You okay?” She asked once we were out of ear shot.
“I’m fine. I think it’s safe to say that he was more
uncomfortable that I was.” I laughed lightly.
The other members of 5 Seconds of Summer walked past us as
they walked onto the stage. We exchanged quick hellos and that was it.
Half way through the show the boys stopped for a break.
“This next song is called ‘Amnesia’,” Ashton started. “Even though
this song was given to us, it’s still personal. I’d like to dedicate this song
to someone who is actually here tonight. This one’s for you.”
I could feel the tears beginning to pool into my eyes as the
song went on.
“I’m sorry, Y/F/N, but I need to go.”
Hearing the words Ashton said as well as the lyrics proved to
be more than I could handle. Even though it felt like an eternity since the
break-up I still missed him more than I realized.
Y/F/N nodded, understanding and hugged me before I left
toward the exit.
Getting back to the apartment I quickly stripped my clothes, removed
my make-up and stepped into the shower. I stood under the water, letting it wash
over my skin, washing the day away. I wanted nothing more than to forget
everything that had taken place over the last few hours and the feelings that
came along with it.