i'm-not-even-sure-what-i-was-trying-to-do-with-this-post

4

Come to me with secrets bare, I’ll love you more so don’t be scared, when we’re old and near the end, we’ll go home and start again.

requested by seleneswonder

When you see this, share three random lines from 3 WIPs

(or I can post three snippets from the same monstrously long WIP)

1. Helena stacked the paper with the rest of its brethren and moved to unpack another box. “You don’t think that’s strange, an old, paved over cemetery not being haunted by unhappy spirits?”

Caturanga caught her eye over the table. “It’s very strange. And given this average enough home’s full history of sightings, it’s positively baffling.” He was smiling. “Though it does lend substance to my theory that hauntings have little to do with restless spirits and much more to do with the land or the building’s construction.”

"Or the water or the magnetic fields or the plants grown in the yard."

"Well, we’ll be checking all of those." Caturanga walked over and joined her at the box she was sorting through.

2. "Why are you helping me?" It was a question Myka had wondered for awhile, but had never thought to ask. Helena talked to her and helped her and it was… not what people had always done. People didn’t bother talking back to her too much, not that Myka had tried to talking to many of them. But Helena didn’t care that Myka hadn’t initiated any conversations. Helena pushed forward and talked to her and interacted with her and generally wouldn’t leave her alone. It had shifted Myka’s focus and activities and she was still trying to adjust. But she wanted to know why Helena wouldn’t leave her alone.

"Because you had an intriguing device sitting there begging to be made fully functional," Helena answered.

"Because you’re studying me." Myka kept forgetting that. She wasn’t used to being noticed let alone studied. No one studied her. Ever.

Helena sighed. “Yes, and because I’m studying you. Because I’m fascinated that you exist, because I want to know why and I want to know how and I want to know why you.”

"Why me what?"

"Why you are a ghost in a world where most of the dead do not become ghosts," Helena said.

3. “Make a list,” Caturanga said. “Everything you might possibly do or try if you knew humans could be resurrected from ghosts, write it down. Every thought you would have, every new ambition, write it down. Then think up every possible reaction the rest of the world might have, heads of governments, the public, write it all down. We need to prepare.”

“I don’t understand,” Helena said. “Prepare for what? We already know people can be resurrected. We have Myka right upstairs.”

“Exactly.” Caturanga turned around very sharply to face her. “We know, but what if we didn’t. What if you and I were exactly the scientists and people that we are, but we were hearing about this from somewhere else. What would we do? How would we think? We need to know this because others will think these things.”

“But we’re not telling others about this. No one’s going to know about what we’ve done.” Helena believed that had been the plan, though she realized now they had never discussed what to do if they were successful. There had been too much planning and caution for what could go wrong.

“No, we are not,” Caturanga said, and Helena relaxed. “This is no longer about the research. We have a young girl to protect. Her life, her privacy. She’ll have enough to deal with just coming back to life twenty years after she left. We still have no idea how she’ll handle it, and we are not going to force her to cope with millions of eyes on her while the media argues whether she’s a miracle or the devil.”

Oh god they would do that. “Then why do we need these lists?”

“Because in order to keep her safe, we have to know every angle, every possible scenario that could occur if this news gets out and prepare for the worst.”

“Shouldn’t we focus on someone recognizing her. This is still her hometown.”

“Yes, that is the obvious problem,” Caturanga said. “But no matter what we might do, someone will find out, so what happens then. Think, Helena! We have work to do!”

BONUS! (from much later)

Helena returned to the room with no signs of the RA’s.

"Am I in trouble?" Myka managed to say.

"No, of course you’re not." Helena sat back upon the bed and rubbed her shoulder. "It was just burnt popcorn again. No reason for us to leave."

"It was because I asked you to stay."

"What?"

"Earlier," Myka said, "I asked you to stay over and I got scared for a second. That if you didn’t stay something bad was going to happen." She scrunched her eyes shut. "And I know that was irrational, but it was there and I thought it. And then the fire alarm went off."

"It’s alright. You’re safe." Helena pushed her hand into Myka’s and clasped it. "I’m safe. Everything’s alright."

Tears began to slip out. “I really wanted to stay.”

"What?"

"I really wanted to stay, but I thought I’d get in too much trouble. That I wouldn’t get to come back to see Sam anymore." A sob broke free, but Myka still talked. "I didn’t ask. I wanted to stay, but I didn’t ask. I thought I should go home."

"Oh Myka." Helena slipped down to stand in front of her. "It wasn’t your fault. You know it wasn’t your fault."

But Myka cried anyway. “I didn’t want to go home.”

It’s amazing sometimes how quickly I can go from being blissfully happy, absorbed in my favourite fictional worlds not worrying about anything to wanting to sleep for a century because I don’t have the energy to move because I remembered all life’s responsibilities and all my fears of growing up. I’m really not ready to be an adult ugh.

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