Close the barn doors and tie down the cow Marybelle, I feel a tantrum comin’ in from the west. I could be wrong but tonight feels like a bit of a whingey, shouty “I don’t want to be a policeman, I want to be a princess” kind of night (thanks Kindergarten Cop for a lovely turn of phrase). If you’re not losing your shit tonight Rammy Ram then I suspect you will be shining like a 3yo beauty pageant queen. And then losing your shit.
While the socially-minded designers show off their wares for Park(ing) Day, you decide to do something a little closer to home. A little glitter here and a few streamers there. Perhaps a ridiculously overdone hallway tromp l’oeil with a pile of stupefied bodies in a custom-built pit at the end. Pop out to the shops and buy all the things you need to seriously overdo it tonight Big Bull.
Have you heard the phrase, ‘Go off like a frog in a sock’ Gemmy Gem? I suspect that your brain will be firing synapses like it never has before and shooting words down to your mouth as if your life depends on it. Or maybe it does? Whether you’re a CIA operative caught in a tight jam, or a misplaced soul at someone else’s work drinks, you will be able to talk to anyone about anything. With sparkle, of course!
Righty-ho there Courageous Cancer, gather up your pillows it’s time to build another lounge or bedding related fortress. You gotta protect what’s yours. And the only thing that is really yours is your heart. Um, if you look around your lounge room and see people sitting uncomfortably on the floor, it’s because you have ALL the cushions. This may be going too far. Your call, throw ‘em a cushion or tell ‘em to leave.
Tonight has all the hallmarks of a Johnny Cash prison gig. A sparkling entertainer. A captive audience. And an above average sprinkling of bad tattoos. Hmm, this is not likely to manifest in those exact terms, but if you do have friends over for a few laughs, show them where the exits are. Of course, this is also the type of energy that leaves the door to the spirit world ajar. So it could just be Great Aunty Thelma fucking with the locks.
With your foot on the clutch you slam into 4th gear throwing hyperrealism into hyperdrive. Every last detail will be noticed, created, recorded. Tonight your dreams have edges. Tonight your friends are on the same page. Tonight a beautifully rehearsed West Side Story gang marches from stage left right into your living room and yells, “You got brothers around.” It’s true, you do. Enjoy them.
Gee Luscious you’ll need sensible shoes if you’re gonna climb that ladder. Those Minolo Blahniks (not gender specific) will be hell on your arches. You will be prepared to do whatever it takes to further your position in the spotlight. Now before you dye your hair blonde, glue on the fake eyelashes (again, not gender specific) and sing ‘Happy birthday Ms CEO’ check you are wearing undies. Because shit WILL go down and you don’t want to be caught sans pants.
Guard, somebody stop that wishy-washy ideology running away with the order. I said Gatekeeper!! Don’t let them get away! Am I being too dramatic. Sorry. There will be no vagaries on your watch tonight Super Scorp, you are in charge of the ideas. Well, you think you are, but life has a funny way of doing whatever the fuck it wants. The choice is yours, put in the effort and influence those around you or give yourself a break and snuggle up with a good book.
If you are not a political advisor, tonight you will be. Maybe not at the upper levels of your country’s governing mayhem. But you will be all over who said what, why they said it and how the hell you’re going to get them to back down from their outrageous public assertions. You will be clipping wings like a Fucked-up Falconer. Yes, that’s right, they should be flying but you’re gonna stop them goddammit. Don’t lose yourself in the flurry of feathers Super Sag.
Awww! Billy Goat’s growing up. If you’re in a relationship, chances are you’ll be planning for the future. Now, this is not a new thing for you. But including someone else in your plans is a little startling and, quite frankly, risky for you. Think of all the variables they will bring?! If you’re the other person, don’t get too excited, it’s only one night. No partner? Planning with a bestie maybe. Or if you are a true lone wolf, there will be an unexpected intrusion.
Gee Interesting Innovator, it’s your way or the highway tonight! Out in the shed, night after night, you’ve been putting the finishing touches on your bandwagon. And tonight, in all of its glory, it bursts from its hiding place and you will be expecting everyone to jump on. Especially your significant other (if you have one). They will, of course, because it’s easier than arguing with you. Loner? That pet rock better pull its weight.
Hey Little Fish you’ve seen some wrong doing and its getting under your scales. Somebody has to stand up for the Tiny Fish and tonight it’s you. Well actually, it’s usually you, but tonight people are going to notice. You’ve organised a stop work meeting down by the broken fishing rod and a rally later on at the crusty reef. You’re gonna change things even if it kills you (careful with that one). Go you Big Fish!
zerodaystars Friday 19 September 2014 was originally published on Etheric Edge