everything is just so wrong.

Don’t you think it’s a little fucked up what this world is coming to? I mean the old days.. they had to have been so much easier, although their was no technology and less medical cures.. there was true love, real trust, honesty.. well what the hell do we have now? nothing but fake heartless souls.. we all sit here like everything’s perfectly fine and we live in such a great world but we don’t! it sucks here. it sucks having somebody tell you they love and leave the next day.. it sucks being called fat or ugly or a whore for no reason, because sometimes we cant change who we are.. and we weren’t meant to either! we are made the way we are, because that’s who we are supposed to be, but everybody seemed to have changed anyways.. Nobody was like this at the beginning, nobody was heartless when we were little we used to love so many people, so many things, we used to trust our friends, and we would always tell them the truth.. what happened? where did all of the amazing people we used to be go? why are we all pretending like it’s all okay? and not doing anything about it? is it because we are all too afraid to be who we used to be? instead we all just pretend to be who we are not so that we can fit in, and be what everybody calls “cool” when in all reality its the exact opposite..It’s terrible to know how many people cry themselves to sleep every night.. who cut themselves.. who feel of no self worth and like nobody gives a fuck…but none of it’s true.. it’s not people do care.. you are worth a lot! and your fucking beautiful.. the only reason we don’t believe it is because everybody else is so afraid of being hurt by you..they just leave your side.. they make fun of you.. they hurt you…and the reason? is because they are in the same spot as you..they feel worthless..they feel ugly..they feel like nothing too.. but when you say something mean to somebody when you hurt somebody.. you feel better than them…giving yourself self worth.. which is absolutely terrible.. but none of us really know a different way to do it.. but just remember when you do say something hurtful to somebody or you hurt them by actions..just remember even though you feel worth more.. their self worth is just going down even more.. and they are too hurt to realize anything right now.. so they just take it.. and they feel like they should give up. because nothing ever works for them.. okay people lets think.. how many marriages end in divorce? a lot.. how many relationships end in somebody just walking away? millions.. why? because we are all too lost in this fucking fantasy world that we can all do better.. but your not listening to anybody but yourself.. your not listening to their real feelings.. your not seeing the love they are offering because your too lost in the thought that you need more.. and your not going to rest until you get the best.. but you see when you get to the best.. the best is going to think that they need more because they feel like they can do better…they feel like they are better.. but they aren’t.. and neither are you for doing what you did to that other person.. its all just a constant cycle of trying to do better… when in all honesty..that’s not what we were meant to do.. we are meant to find somebody we really care for and love..not because of how popular they are..or their looks..because of who they are.. how they make you feel..how right it all feels when you feel their lips linger on yours.. we are all missing the fact that we are not meant to do better all the time.. we are meant to find the one who you care for..who cares for you.. who it would hurt like hell to lose..because it will hurt in the end.. I promise you that.. it always does.. so lets look back on all of this now we have untrustworthy, hopeless, heartless people who cry themselves to sleep all the time, we have people who hurt other people to make them feel better, we have people who just walk away from everything because they can feel they can do better or its too hard….. before we had trustworthy, hopeful, love filled people who cared.. who helped, who loved and never wanted anything more than what they had and loved..you never really heard of anybody cutting themselves…. killing themselves over so many little things.. but when you have so many things happen to you.. you just get overwhelmed and frustrated and just cant take it anymore.. that never used to happen..never.. I just wish everything would go back to the way it was.. and i don’t mean like a year ago or when i was little…. I mean like a long long time ago.. when happiness.. was everywhere all the time.. never to be lost..

—Kylee Sue Northern

I was tagged by peachtides <333

RULES: 

1. Always post the rules 

2. Answer the questions of the person who tagged you and write 10 new ones

3. Tag 10 people and link them

4. Let them know you’ve tagged them

HER QUESTIONS: 

1. What’s your favorite candle sent? Yankees Apple Pie ♥

2. Chinese food or Italian food? Chinese 

3. What’s your favorite candy? Sour Patch Kids!!!

4. Do you have a lucky number? If so what is it? 15 and 22!!!

5. What’s your favorite season? Is it bad I dont have one? I like all seasons xDD

6. What shampoo do you use? Garnier Fructis 

7. What beauty products do you use? Ummm none…lol

8. Jelly beans or gummy bears or neither? Neither 

9. What’s your birthday? July 15th

10. What’s your current favorite song? Ever Enough by Rocket to the Moon ♥♥ 

MY QUETIONS: 

1. Your favorite kind of day?

2. Do you go to parties often? 

3. Does your best friend have a tumblr? 

4. 3 words to describe yourself?

5. Are you an active person? 

6. The beach or the park?

7. Your favorite music artist? 

8. Do you like to travel? Where would you want to go?

9. Do you play Candy Crush? What level are you in?

10. If you can pick the color of the sky, what color would you chose? 

I often wonder, if I did quit, lose my job or something else led to me being unemployed again...would I find anything better?

I constantly talk about getting out of there, how shitty it is and how I need a better job with better pay. But deep down I can’t shake the feeling like I’d just end up unemployed for another four years or longer. Like…I’m just not worth anything better then where I am right now. Working for $7.75 in a Supermarket bakery as maintenance, cleaning dishes and mopping the floor, surrounded by people who hate working there as much as I do. And I can’t take that surrounding for the rest of my life; so the next thing to go wrong would be I’d end up on the streets by the time I’m 30. Or dead from suicide. Anyway you look at it, I just don’t feel like I’m worth fucking shit. 

I’m employed for the first time since 2009, and I still feel like a pathetic fucking bum.

No Hope In Humanity


-I wish I didn’t feel or think this way…but I do think and feel this way…in all honesty I don’t think I ever really had much hope in Humanity. It’s unfortunate but it’s the truth of how I feel-

hoeplessness said:

V

3 big dreams
1: to get married at a young age because I feel so confident that I found the right guy.
2: to be be famous. I know this is gonna sound conceited, but I really would love to be a celebrity.
3: to travel the world. There’s a huge world outside this bubble that I keep myself in that needs to be explored, and I would really love to go wherever the wind takes me.

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