Someone please explain to me why when I graced Kava’s with my presence last night, the puttana that worked there had the audacity to ask whether my name was on the list. She should be fired for such stupidity.
Why are you staring? Oh. Did you want a sip of my slushie? Dude, I’m all about sharing, but it’s almost gone. And, I have, like, three flavors mixed in. If that doesn’t bother you, then —- hey, go ahead.
"Hey this came to our door accidentally the other day,
I guess the FedEx guy had a brain fart when he was dropping it off. I would have returned this box to it’s rightful owner sooner but I’ve been real busy, sorry. I hope it wasn’t anything too important.”