I know I need to get my shit together one of these days.. But that day.. Is probably not today. Oh is the woe I feel.
depression is such a nasty , nasty parasite.
I have so much on my plate that I have to do.. And it’s not a bad thing.. But bogs me down on account of my horrible anxiety.
I’m letting down a sisterhood I love so dearly, I’m letting down myself, I’m letting down my potential and my souls serenity. I must open my arms wide and embrace this life whether I’m laughed at, mocked or pissed upon.. Because guess what? I really couldn’t give a fuck..
Welp at least that’s what I try and tell myself from time to time.. The truth? I do give a fuck.. But not in the way of I WILL pressure myself into wearing copious amounts of globbed on make-up, wear the newest and trendiest garb etc. etc. and so on. (I really could careless to ramble about all that shit people eat up like maggots) …
But yes, I don’t care enough about myself to even try and appease others because I give a fuck what they think about me.. But I’m lazy and could care less about how I look, my health, eating habits, and the state of my home..
Even though I’m paranoid, anxious, hate people seeing how I live and always think people probably look at me like I’m some deranged pee-wee herman with some clown shit on my face. T___T
EFF. MY. LIFE.
I’m too scared of success, and succeeding to succeed.. This is bullshit.
That’s it I’m done, this ranting .. Done. DONE. DOOONNNEEEEEEE. D:<