KARMYWATCH 2014

by Brenda

Troubling report on Karmywatch today! Our lovers were torn apart as Amy went home sick from school. Karma was clearly very distressed.

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Meanwhile, with Amy out sick, the nurse’s office reached an all time high of people students also not feeling well. That Amy is such a trendsetter! 

Any students that are healthy probably have the amazing juices sold by Karma’s parents to thank. Molly told Karmywatch that they have healing powers! If only they could bring a love like Karma and Amy’s. 

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Funds are being collected to send a get well gift to Amy, as well as a condolences card to Karma, as we know how much she must be suffering without her other half. Please see Principal Penelope if you’d like to contribute. 

I hope my next report finds these two special treasures together again!

Karma's Parents Run Good Karma

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In a shocking turn, today the popular proprietors of the Good Karma juice truck revealed that their truck’s name was in fact not a coincidence — they are the parents of popular Hester student and famous lesbian Karma Ashcroft. 

Hester students were largely unaware, but unsurprised that two such wonderful things (juice and Karma Ashcroft) would come from the same source. 

As always Hester students, if any other huge Hester news breaks, you’ll here it from me first. Vashti Nadira, signing off.