An update on how we are doing...
Our little guy is staying in upstate NY with his Granny so Jeff and I have had some rare alone time this last week (thank you Mum!!!). Jeff is very tired and needs to sleep a lot but we have made it out to the MOVIES and even went to a grownup party at NIGHTTIME. Those of you who are also parents of young children know exactly what I’m talking about. We also spent a couple of nights in a perfect, bay front cabin on stilts at Nick’s Cove on Tomales Bay. It’s only 30 minutes from us but it was like visiting a far away land (maybe because there are no giant trees blocking the view?)
We’re a week into Jeff’s 3rd round of chemo. It’s going well. The Thing has already shrunk, a lot. The current plan is to do 6 rounds followed by radiation and gamma knife on various bits of him. He has surgery soon to put a pin in his hip (he has a complete fracture of his femur). As you can imagine, he hates having to use a walker and a wheelchair and we’re hoping the surgery will give him back his mobility.
We are realizing that this is a long road. Speaking for myself I’m gradually adjusting from emergency mode to some kind of acceptance of our new life. Not always though. Occasionally I have to get in the car, drive down the hill and have a good scream.
We’ve been floored by the generosity of friends and neighbors who have helped so much: picking up Alex from preschool, having him for playdates and sleepovers, bringing us meals, etc, etc. Thank you.
And then (this is the part that is hard for me to write and where I keep getting stalled)….. and then there is you and your generosity. Our portion of the bills* have finally started to roll in from the hospital and the labs and the imaging center and the oncologist and the second opinions at UC Davis and UCSF….and ….YOUR DONATIONS ARE COVERING IT!!!!
(*What we will be totally responsible for is always shifting and hard to get a handle on. I seem to spend hours on the phone with medical billing departments and Anthem BlueCross, mostly correcting “coding” mistakes. I don’t understand how patients can deal with this unless they have a family member who can quit their jobs to stay on top of it.)
I can’t tell you what a weight off my mind it is not to have to worry about that on top of everything else. I don’t know what to say other than…..thank you. Really. Thank you. I can’t do it right now, but as soon as time stops being so compressed, I will be sending each and every one of you at least a thank you card. I can’t believe that you all care about what happens to us. Ok I believe it now but you’ve kind of blown my mind. Can’t. Write. How. I. Feel. In. Words. Ack.
Ok. Onwards. One day at time.
My friends at ODC Dance are throwing us a benefit concert on July 31. They will be dancing and the Magik Magik orchestra and the Pacific Boys Choir will be performing the music (if it’s not weird to play at your own benefit concert and if I can get down to SF that night and do so without dissolving into a puddle I will be there to play “Optimist”, but I can’t promise).
Huge thanks and love, Z