fitz out~

I won’t be able to fuckin’ deal with anything, if season 3 starts out with Fitz thinking that Jemma abandoned him for the second time!!!!! :((( and that the reason behind her disappearance is that she was too freaked out to go on an actual date with him! :((((

maybe there is

2

Maybe there is.

This is the moment where Jemma Simmons realizes that she needs to talk to Fitz. That she needs to talk to him about how she feels. But why?

Why is this the moment that Jemma figures out her feelings? Why not before where she must have shared a similar moment with Fitz when he was in the coma? Why not the many times she knew she could have lost him in the field, that he could die and she wouldn’t be with him anymore? I think the answer has several layers.  

The first and foremost is that Jemma is idealistic. We’ve seen this translate into how she acts as a person and as a scientist, as a SHIELD agent. It’s what drew her to the organization. Jemma has a vision of how things should be. And while not explicitly stated, I believe that this applies to romance just as well. A by-the-books romance has passion and love at first sight. It’s a fire that destroys you instantly. The flame she’s held for Fitz has always been slow-burning and constant; it’s not a mad and all-consuming love - so what if that’s just their friendship?

The second part of this answer is that while Jemma may not always be in touch with her own emotions, she is very much in touch with others. She knows that what Bobbi and Hunter have is love. That despite all their arguments and differences, Hunter will go willingly into a trap because of the off-chance that it will save Bobbi, and Bobbi will put herself between a gun and him no matter the personal cost. That Hunter will stand at Bobbi’s bed side, waiting for her to come to, before even going to wash the blood of his face. At the end of the day, at their core, they matter more to each other than whatever has been keeping them apart. And, as we saw when SHIELD collapsed, or when she left for HYDRA, that Jemma knows that when push comes to shove, Fitz’s safety and well-being matters to her the most.

And I think in this moment, Jemma realizes that what she feels for Fitz overlaps with what she knows Bobbi and Hunter feel for each other. That love is what’s there at the end of the day, when there’s nothing and nobody more important to you than the other person. When the other person is more than that. It’s been a love that Simmons couldn’t recognize, until she did.  And I think that’s why Jemma didn’t know how to broach the subject with Fitz all these months, despite their fighting and problems. Because she didn’t know how she felt or what she could say. But now, maybe there is something for her to say. 

I wait.
Wait with excitement, with a nervousness that comes from deep within my bones. In a little while we will meet. She will be done with work and I will be ready to take another leap into space. She will smile. I will keep my expression calm, to hide the tremors inside me. Everything will end and everything will start again.

I wait.
The minutes tick by so slowly. She isn’t in her room, so I wait. Soon she will greet me, her voice like light fingers on piano keys. I’ve exchanged my clothes for nicer ones. My palms sweat. I pace the floor. But there is hope in my heart that I can’t stifle.

I look.
The others haven’t seen her. She must be done with work by now. The lab is empty. The kitchen is quiet. I let out a slow breath, my mind spinning in circles. Was it all too good to be true? But she never said no. The truth seeps into me slowly, making my stomach sink and my limbs grow tired.
She never said yes either.

I stop.
Why look for what doesn’t want to be found? In a rush, I had spoken too soon. The touch of her hand sent me soaring. I believed anything was possible and overstepped my boundary. She must have realized her mistake and went to hide rather than be forced to hurt me. Because she is good – too good for me. We came back together but now I have separated us again with my impulsive dreams that she is too kind to shatter.
I was never more than that after all.

I remember.
Her hand over mine. The way she stood beside me. A look in her eyes that filled me with life. Did I misread it all? I don’t know. The boy who had the answers drowned in the sea, and I am left with confusion. She couldn’t want me and this proves it. So then why did she say those words to me? With such hesitation but certainty in her eyes she spoke words that should never have existed between us. I don’t believe she would say that without thinking it through. Not the girl who is constantly thinking.

I search.
I’m wound tight again, but not with nervous energy. With fear. It’s been hours. No one has seen her and they too worry. She wouldn’t run away, not just to keep from hurting me. That would be a cowardly move. And there is no one more brave than she.
That’s how I know.

I pause.
The last to see her was me. She was hard at work. At work with a relic that none of us understand.
Even as I watch them search the tapes, I feel as if I already know. Her name fills my mind. But everyone was safe and everyone survived. No one believed there was still danger. We took it all for granted.

I run.
Run through the halls we walked through together, hours before. I reach the room that holds the stone. It sits idle in its box, just as it was before. But the girl with smiles in her eyes is gone.
My friends come up behind me, stricken by what they’ve seen. I left before I saw the truth, but now it is written in their eyes.
She is gone.

I fall.

—  From a boy to his best friend, part III 

anonymous asked:

OK, Darcy dressed as a plushy fluffy bunny wabbit versus Wickham dressed as a Ninja?

is this a fight to the death match?

because as a friend I’m bound to say Darcy, but as a full ninja supporter I want to say Wickham

or is this a dance off?

because then Wickham wins. sorry, Darc, but you as I’ve heard, you are an awkward dancer.

or better yet, is this who I want to see standing next to Lizzie at next years halloween party that I may or may not be already planning?

because then I say Darcy all the way with Lizzie dressed up in a matching costume.

Fitz is going to walk back in a few minutes later with a stupid grin on his face because he can’t believe he’s really going on a date with Jemma Simmons and he’s got a dozen different plans for dinner that he wants to go over with her and that grin is going to disappear as quickly as it came when he sees that she’s gone again