alright cheque is coming soon got my insurance papers filed and i'm oing to be healed soon!

so once my wrist stops hurting i’m going to use my first check to get me some gym clothes a pair of pants and my gym membership. It’s high time i finally get started on what i’ve wanted to do for a while now.  I just want to take the time and thank a few people who has given me the drive and inspiration i needed to finally stop being a lazy bum and take control of my life in small but nice paragraphs.

Dear dylan (noodlesandbeef)

Although for the most part i say this all the time well to you directly and such, and i always tell myself no because i feel i’m annoying you. okay so i first found out about you through dan (carneenchiladas) when i read a post he made talking about you i followed cause he said he worked out and had his master help him towards his goals so that inspired me plus he had a nice butt. okay then i had spent an hour going through your blog and barely made a crack in there cause you have been blogging a long long time, but nonetheless i took all your ideas and tips and i made a word document to keep it together so i can come back to it when i needed it most. so you just being you helped a bunch really, i mean after reading your blog and just seeing how came from being a small guy through your own preservation and will inspired me to get to where i knew i could go but was too sad to do it. so i started to take control and move in with my brother to get away from all the pain and sadness to make it in my life to where i want to be. if you can do it i can do it thanks man you mean a whole lot to me. :)

Dear dan (carneenchiladas)

i first found out about your blog of a follower of mine (i think or maybe it was a porn blog) but you had the nicest butt and i though it was just a porn blog or something, but then i read it some more but only a few posts it was late at night and i was tired so i didn’t really get to one about you talking about dylan your boyfriend and master so i followed, and i liked how you were bulking and such and made me want to get that big too. i then found out that he was your boyfriend a few days after and i instantly fell in love with the both of you (as an inspiration of course and i thought you guys made the bestest couple in the world) so i started to want to get bigger too so that i would have a more valid reason to meet you both and say thank you for allot of things. but you inspire me to for the most part i really look up to you guys. :)

Dear jack (wedontknowjack)

Although i had just recently told you this cause well just like dylan i would feel like i was bugging you because that’s just how i am i question allot of the things i do. i can never really find the will to do anything cause i feel like no one will really like me. i don’t remember how long i’ve been following you but i think i started cause of how open and proud you were about being a sub and i admired that in a sense i always though that being a sub was bad or degrading because of porn and other things so i was a blind guy and didn’t really think much about it. but after i started investing some of my time to check out your blog in more of a depth i learned that you were dylans pup too and i thought to myself,”wow he’s helping him out too that’s like woah! i mean from how far he’s gotten and to how open and free he is” it’s made me look more into life than just being sad and annoyed at life for sucking. so i guess i feel a little more open about myself i’m not afraid to really explain how i want my relationship and what role i play in it. so thanks :)

dear Arman (bigxbad)

your a pretty cool dude and i wanted to thank you (again) for telling not to give up in my job search. you did tell me it was all me but you gave me some words that helped me keep going instead of sitting on my butt and hating myself for not being work worthy. plus you started working out wih dylans plan and it worked great on you so i know for sure that i will get there someday and it would be awsome to meet you and tony at folsom (if i still go) so we can say yo and stuff and you can meet my dads (if they do go or i go). so yeah thanks for the helpful words. :3

dear tony (ffhusbear)

i feel like an ass for saying this, but their is not really much to say. i wish i could say nice things about how you’ve helped the best thing i could think of was when you’ve helped my curiosity on the matters of fisting. and other things i cant remember at the moment. your a cool guy though i literally shipped you and arman when i thought you both were just close friends then i saw a post saying you were his husbear so i felt pretty stupid. nonetheless though i hope to the might efforts of will and trying hard that i will see you and everyone at folsom! :D

and last but not least

Dear dads (S.B. & A.C.)

i want to thank you guys most of all if you still read my blog and i hope that you do read this. but thank you for everything you’ve done i honestly would have cracked under all the pressure at home if it wasnt for you two. taking away so much of your free time just to hang out with me and i feel so blind that i never realized it. i try not to cry when i know how far we are and how long will it be till i see you guys again, but then i think to myself no matter what you will always encourage me to be the best me i can be and live my life to achieve all my goals so that i have nothing to regret on. i know i tend to say sorry allot but i can never really find a good word or what to do to really make up for it honestly. i do promise though to be just a great as a person as you two i want to look at myself in the mirror one day or a picture of us together and say it was all because of them that i am who i am the best people in the world who care more for me than most of my family have pushed and helped me be where i could always go but needed that nudge to get there. i really miss you guys allot though i promise not to be a failure to you both i will succeed i will make it and i will repay you both back someday. thank you dads i love you always and i will never ever forget you both. :’)

and any other followers who do happen to read this and you practically did and well these are my true feelings i wouldn’t have a good reason to lie about them, i say them allot only cause i feel the need to always thank the person or persons who have helped me get to where i could always go. :)


so folsom is a sure thing! just checked the ticket prices and with the job i have and how long until the actually fair i can totally make it! and from what post i’ve read from some of my favorite blogs can’t wait to shake their hands i hope i get to see them too especially my “dads who will be picking me up from the airport!

Oh man i’m so excited i just hope my body will be in good shape for it don’t want to feel embarrassed. :/ sad but true.

people who i happen to enjoy:

  1. campusbeefcake (7%)
  2. ginger-beef (6%)
  3. tlroh (6%)
  4. joebearpr (5%)
  5. ffhusbear (5%)
  6. iamtrexhearmeroar (4%)
  7. noodlesandbeef.com/ (4%)
  8. jack-men-asian (4%)
  9. lychgate (4%)

well than i forgot to do this. well it’s the second so oh well still the end of last month. wow ive been bummed so long that dylan dropped down there and dan isn’t even on here! wow i didn’t think i was that bummed/busy.