"When the Japanese were coming, my husband put me and the boys on a boat to Australia to evacuate. There were two boats leaving that day and we got on the first one. But before departure, I realised one of the boys had left his comfort pillow on the dock, so we went back out to get it. He would be inconsolable without it.

Well we found the pillow but before we could get back to our seats

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And this, ladies and gentlemen, is a 16-word explanation as to why females are scared to the fucking bone every time a guy does so much as holler at them, because no matter the circumstance or the amount of desperation in a plea for help, it’s always her fault

Fact 3759: China’s “one child” policy has contributed to female infanticide and has created a significant gender imbalance. There are currently 32 million more boys than girls in China. In the future, tens of millions of men will be unable to find wives, prompting some scholars to suggest that this imbalance could lead to a threat to world security.