C: I wish I could confide more in my mom. I don’t have any friends really, so it would be nice if I could talk to my mom about more intimate things not just sex, but insecurities and really be vulnerable with her. But I know that I can’t because she always throws my insecurities, vulnerabilities and confessions against me in any argument or discretion I may get myself into. Didn’t do the dishes. *Throws insecurity in my face* Gets bad grade in school. “Well if you weren’t so worried about xyz..“
I learned that the hard way when she did this to me all throughout middle and grammar school to me when I was being heavily bullied and by the time high school came around she was pretty much throwing the same daggers at me from middle school. I tried confiding in her about my bisexuality but she just wasn’t having it and made me feel like a fool. That was almost 6 years ago and still haven’t brought it up. So now, I don’t tell her anything. We get along mostly but I know that it’s only until a certain point. I can’t confide in her and really talk to her in an emotionally intimate way.
I promise that if I ever have children I will strive to never be this way with them, especially with my daughter. I promise I won’t shove their their confidential secrets in their face when I’m mad at them or they’re not acting the way I want them to.