We are going to be messed up parents

in the future when our kids ask us how we met their father/mothers  we are going to come up with some really messed up things less of the romantic stuff like “we meet in school and your father went all out to get me my attention” noooo we are going to have shit like.

" we where F.W.B then we decided to date"

"i saw a picture of your mother on instagram, then i stalked her and we started dating"

"your father reblogged my post on tumblr and i fell for him"  

F.W.B

a sis just wants some phone sex, oral, touching and all that good stuff without all the complications of having the feelings and being in a “relationship” is that so hard. My last two F.W.B didn’t workout in the end cause they caught “The Feelings” I mean is it really to much to ask for these things? As if it’s not hard enough as it is finding a F.W.B whose in the quickie stage, no they have to be the ones who get attached as well! 

No one knows the struggle of not having phone sex, no one~

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