“DEMON HIRO! A MIGHTY AND POWERFUL DEMON! …Ignore the fact that I’m straight-up five foot. And a total whiner-baby with an ego complex. And- well, there’s a ton that I could mention about my mental state, but we don’t have a week to delve into my crazy brain!” Swag laughed, making tiny devil horns with two fingers.
“Also, I’m kind of addicted to killing people. And sex. And killing people with sex- wait, shit, no, wrong! I don’t do that, I swear! I just eat people’s souls,” Swag said, placing a hand over his heart like a boy scout. “You know, just normal things for a fourteen year old to do.”
Then he flapped his arms and cawed like a bird before grinning. “BEWARE THE DIVINE CHICKEN AS I WILL EAT YOUR SOUL! …wait, is Fem watching? Dude, I can’t eat souls in front of my girlfriend! Maybe we can just cuddle and do dumb couple things like sharing a soda down at the ice cream parlor,” Swag said in a saccharine voice.
“Swag, you owe me a twenty! Swag, can you get me a blood bag? Swag, you’re so lame, why can’t you be cool like me? Ignore the fact that I fell out of a tree. I looked so cool while I did it, amirite?”