The People you meet on the LIRR

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It’s not that I have anxiety about having to sit next to someone random; everyone just really wants their own personal space after a day of work and commuting. Am I right!? 

Of course I am. Socially you would always choose a seat away from someone It’s only natural. Here are some characters from the highly esteemed always on time, never crowded Long Island Rail Road…

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1. The one who talks to themselves or says random things out-loud. You don’t know if they are talking to you and you should say something or not.  There’s obvious speculation on your end that they’re in fact crazy and saying something may topple them over the edge. In the end you stay quiet and feel awkward as hell. 

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2. The one who falls asleep on you. Not even the 2:55am drunk train and yet people are still falling asleep on you. I get it, it was a long Monday at the office or Tuesday or Wednesday but seriously!  You question your morals and whether or not you should let them sleep on you or nudge them off. Usually the latter wins.

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3. (Drunk train) And of course on that 2:55am drunk train you have, The one who is super wasted. This person had so much fun/to drink that they are throwing up on the train but of course yelling that they’re not intoxicated. Oh yeah sweetie, tell that to the pile of vomit in your section and your friends force-feeding you water. You feel sort of bad because of course we’ve all been in this position but its clearly too amusing for pity! 

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4. The one who is yelling on their cell phone. No lady we don’t give a shit if you can’t postpone your manicure and pedicure appointment to next week. This goes for all places actually! Enough said.  (Side note as I edit this, I may or may not have had a decently loud conversation on the train about money and birthright with my grandma…sorry!? ) 

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5. The person who asks to sit down next to you. Of course I don’t want you to sit next to me you but who is going to say no? 

Which leads to…

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That person who always sits down right next to you, without uttering a word the whole time you ride home together. They continue to be silent the whole time and it’s kind of awkward. Actually its quite awkward due to the consistent eye fucking that occurs. I don’t know which one I prefer. Probably the eye fucking! 

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6. Due to the eye fucking comment I shall add this one. The person you fall in love with. Whether it is the LIRR or the Subway system, I always find myself yearning for someone. Within the hourish ride home I try to find out as much as possible as the person. Who they’re taking to in the phone, what applications they have on their smart phone, what book they’re reading. Does this make me creepy? No I think it makes me romantic! 

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