I pumped in and out of her, getting lost in the overwhelming pleasure. She was shaking beneath me and screaming my name as I buried my head in the nape of her neck giving her those final three strokes. She came on each one. I slammed into her one last time and was so caught up in the moment that I didn’t pull out and came in her. I hoped she wouldn’t notice, but I knew she would. She was very adamant about us never having kids together while we were doing what we were doing. I rolled from on top of her, we were both panting and trying to catch our breaths. She sat up in the bed and climbed on top of me.
“Aubrey,” she looked me right in the eyes.
“You. Didn’t. Fucking. Pull. Out!”
She punctuated each word with a punch to the chest. She had noticed, and was infuriated. I laid back in silence awaiting to be reprimanded.
“What would you do if I got pregnant, Aubrey?! How would you explain that to your fucking wife?!”
She got off me, walking into her bathroom and slamming the door. I thought about what she said, what would I do? Before I could think any farther, Nic stormed out with a towel wrapped around her, mumbling. “Drake, WHEN are you gonna leave her?” I didn’t have an answer, so I stayed silent. “I don’t wanna be the other woman forever…I feel like a whore, Aubrey! You’re married!” I got up and walked over to her, she had tears in her deep brown eyes that looked as if they were about to fall. “Nic, I’m sorry. I-I-I,” she put her hand up silencing me. “Don’t,” she mumbled. She went back into the bathroom and proceeded to shower alone, I waited for her to get out so I could shower as well. I’d be dead if I came home with the sweet scent of Onika on me. She stepped out and without looking at me went to her closet. I got in the shower, rinsed off and got out. I put my clothes back on and went downstairs to find Nicki, in the kitchen. “Nic? Babe, I gotta get going.” I went to kiss her lips, but she turned forcing me to kiss her cheek. She silently sat sipping her tea as I left.
I felt guilty about cheating on my wife, it killed me inside, but not as much as it was killing Nicki. I had always had an undying love for Nicki, she loved me the same, but just wasn’t ready to proclaim it to the world, which bothered me. After having the same recurring fight we stopped speaking and I eventually went back to my first love, Nebby. We started dating again, got engaged and got married.
Before our first wedding anniversary, I reconnected with Nicki, and we had brunch. Things were never meant to go farther than that, but like Noah warned, they did, and we had sex…well, we made love and feelings that never went away resurfaced.
All of that was six months ago, and despite both of us attempting to end this little affair, we kept coming back to each other, ignoring both of our minds and following our hearts. I loved Nebby as well though, I just wasn’t in love with her. I didn’t go to sleep at night thinking about her, despite the fact that she was the one laying beside me. I didn’t enjoy her giggle as much as I did Nic’s, which was music to my ears.
Driving back home I made the decision that it wasn’t fair for Nebby nor Nicki to have to share me, so I’d tell Nebby that I would like a divorce. I had to stop being a coward. I parked in the driveway and made my way into the house. There was soft music playing, the lights were dimmed and candles lit. “Neb?” She came down the stairs wearing nothing but lacy red lingerie. “Yes?” She purred, placing a finger under my chin. “I, umm, I need to talk to you…it’s important,” I managed to fumble out. “It can wait,” she said leading me up the stairs.
It had been a week, since I attempted to tell Nebby, and I was on my way to Nicki’s house. She had been ignoring my calls and texts. I walked into her house using the key she gave me and found her watching Judge Judy in an old crew neck of mine, sitting Indian style on her couch.
“Did you tell her yet?” She was straight to the point, and kept her eyes on the screen.
“I tried,” I said sighing.
Her expression was unchanging, “then why are you here? You can’t have the best of both worlds, Drake. She gets to be treated like your queen, walk around and be wifey! And what does Nic get? To be someone you fuck when y’all are having problems? I don’t think so. My own mother is questioning herself, thinking she raised a slut because I’m sleeping around with a married man. So until you are no longer married, or at least on your way to getting a divorce then WE are nothing.”
I stood there stunned, “Nic, I’ll tell her! I was going to—”
She cut me off again, “are you even planning on being with me Aubrey? Or am I grasping at things that aren’t there?”
“No, Onika. I want to be with you, I do. It’s just, I don’t know how. I still love her, Nic,” I sighed.
That seemed to spark a reaction out of her. Her calm face soon turned to hurt, and even though she tried to hide it, I still saw it in her eyes.
“Aubrey, just please leave,” she pleaded.
“Nicki, I’m in love with you. I can’t just leave, I need you…” I begged.
“You need your wife, go to her Drake.”
I walked to her and wiped her tears with my thumbs, kissed her forehead and left.