Click on the link. This is my Bible, my Koran, my Torah—it’s my fucking religion. This is what I believe. This one cracked article is the most beautiful thing ever written in the English language. My one problem with it is that in the intro, it says you don’t need it if you’re happy and successful in life, because the basic lessons herein apply to everyone. It is applicable in all of all of life’s situations.
Let me start by quoting the article’s quoting of another article's analysis of Alec Baldwin's “If you want to work here, close!” speech in Glengarry Glen Ross:
"If you were in that room, some of you would understand this as a work, but feed off the energy of the message anyway, welcome the coach’s cursing at you, ‘this guy is awesome!’; while some of you would take it personally, this guy is a jerk, you have no right to talk to me like that, or — the standard maneuver when narcissism is confronted with a greater power — quietly seethe and fantasize about finding information that will out him as a hypocrite. So satisfying."
Now let me tell you about how I became an SJW. Are you confused that I keep changing the subject? Well, as you’ll quickly see, I am not.
It all began when I stumbled across a random post from LGBT laughs. For the next two weeks, thereabouts, I went on an archive binge, finding page after page of ally-hate. And so I did what came naturally: I got myself a tumblr account of my own and immediately started following people with names like “idislikecispeople”.
My eyes were opened by the unvarnished criticism of people like me, and I used it to make myself better, and continue trying to do so to this day; I fed off the anger, in other words. A lot of cishet white guys would have had the other reaction the quote lists, and they would have had it for the exact reasons the quote stipulates. This is exactly how “real justice” bloggers come to be, I am convinced. They choose to interpret the anger as hate, because it feels ever so much better to be self-righteously outraged than it does to consider the idea that you might be wrong—after all, if that turns out to be the case, that might require that you work to change yourself, which would involve work.
Allow me to quote the article again:
Inside, you have great compassion for poor people. Great. Does that result in you doing anything about it? Do you hear about some terrible tragedy in your community and say, “Oh, those poor children. Let them know that they are in my thoughts”? Because fuck you if so — find out what they need and help provide it. A hundred million people watched that Kony video, virtually all of whom kept those poor African children “in their thoughts.” What did the collective power of those good thoughts provide? Jack fucking shit. Children die every day because millions of us tell ourselves that caring is just as good as doing. It’s an internal mechanism controlled by the lazy part of your brain to keep you from actually doing work.
And now back to talking about social justice. Ever notice how no distinction is made in the SJW community between being a racist troll and being an “actual” racist? That’s because the distinction is fucking academic. It make zero fucking difference at all why this asshole is trying to trigger people, the only thing that’s important is that they are. Racism isn’t defined by intention, it’s defined by the effect of your actions.
That’s why you can’t be racist against whites, or sexist against men, or heterophobic or cisphobic or whatever other bullshit words anti-SJWs have pulled out of their collective asshole (do note that said words aren’t bullshit because they’re “made up,” but because they’re meaningless, BTW); even if you categorically hate every last white person on the face of the Earth with every fiber of your being, what are you going to do about it? You can be “artisanally violent” against individual white people, but you can’t be systematically violent against them because that system does not exist.
If you’re white, cis, het, male, affluent, able-bodied, neurotypical, or Western, however, you can contribute to systematic oppression without even meaning to—and the fact that you didn’t mean to doesn’t matter. Oh, so you didn’t mean to belittle the genocide of an entire race of people or reinforce stereotypes about Native Americans by dressing your daughter up as Pocahontas for Halloween? Too fucking bad, that’s what you did. Didn’t mean anything by it? What kind of bullshit hippie touchy-feely universe are you living in where you think that matters??? If you “didn’t mean anything by it,” prove it by never doing it again. By improving yourself as a person and an ally, in other words.
The whole section about dating doesn’t even need to be translated into a social justice context; honestly, why was anyone surprised when cracked ended up being anti-gamergate, when this article was written in 2012 and completely rips the Nice Guy mentality to shreds? I mean seriously.
Now, before anyone foolishly asks me something stupid like “if human value is limited to what we do, why do you support helping the homeless and such?”—Even if we ignore the fact that there are a million and nine purely economic reasons to house, feed, and provide healthcare to the homeless (which…why would we? After all, the whole point here is that results are the only thing that matters!), tell me, how exactly do you imagine someone with this philosophy would judge a civilization’s worth? Anyway, the problem with letting people decide who gets to live and die is that history shows that we really suck at it, and besides, we do in fact have enough food to feed everyone at the present moment in time, so why are we even getting into Cold Equations territory in the first place?
Now, then, there’s one more quote:
The human mind is a miracle, and you will never see it spring more beautifully into action than when it is fighting against evidence that it needs to change. Your psyche is equipped with layer after layer of defense mechanisms designed to shoot down anything that might keep things from staying exactly where they are — ask any addict.
Really, I could have quoted the entire section, but this is getting long. You know that graph that shows that white people have more faith that the justice system is fair to black people in the wake of the Mike Brown shooting? This is why. You know how anti-SJWs ignore every explanation of the nature of microaggressions in favor of believing it’s about “muh feelz”? This is why. You know how, whenever someone complains about white people, men, straight people, cis people, et al, some member of the complained about group buts in and shouts about how “not all _____ are like that!” (thereby proving that they, individually, are like that)? This is why.
Deliberately taking criticism as an insult is literally the first reaction on the list—as I previously stated, it’s easier and more fun to get mad than it is to try to improve yourself in any way. Just look at the article and think about it in a social justice context.
Disclaimer for anyone for whom this is their introduction to the world of SJWs: this is my personal philosophy. If it was the only one justifying social justice, there’d likely be a lot fewer communists amongst our ranks.