Actually overheard yesterday
  • P1:My one friend has a strict no-dating policy
  • P2:Oh, well good for her, she's an independent woman!
  • P1:Haha, well he's a guy.
  • P2:Ohh, so like it's a fear of commitment thing.

Been in this kind of mood for well over a year. (and I have a marvelous excuse. In-laws, need I say more.) No one has a good enough excuse not to enjoy my presence unless I don’t like your existence. Does that make sense? I don’t dislike many people, I give everyone a chance. You mess up, I give you one more chance. 3 times the charm, it’s a “fuck you dickwad” to the moon and back after that.

Mean Jeans

Look at these fucking assholes.  Just look at ‘em.  THEY’RE FUCKIN’ TUFF!  DO YOU LIKE TO PARTY?  THESE JERKS LUV TO PAR-TAY!

You’d think the way scenesters suck these guys off, they were getting free beer, instead of herpes.

The only good that’ll come of this trio is that someday I’ll make some bread selling their 7”s to some dipshit on eBay.  Or I’ll make some kid cry by using them for Frisbees.

Look up the word “dillweed” in the OED; you’ll find a picture of Mean Jeans.

I’m fucking done with it.


anonymous asked:

Odd numbers, dillweed.

WELL COCKTRUCK emy requested all of them so im going to do all of them

1. The meaning behind my URL
: Homo = Frodo, Faggins = Baggins. Frodo Baggins = Homo Faggins
2. A picture of me: tagged/matt hays

3. Why I love my bestfriend: He understands me and gets me and is the best bro a guy could ask for. He’s basically my boyfriend tbh. 

4. Last time I cried and why: To be honest, I relapsed a few days ago and my bae said something that nobody’s ever said to me before and I felt so supported and loved that I started crying. Earlier that day I cried becAUSE MATH IS FUCKING DUMB AND IT CAN GO TO HELL.

5. Piercings I have
: vertical labret. I’ve had my eyebrow, nose, ears, regular labret, and stretched ears as well. I’m looking forward to getting a lot more piercings when I have the money.
6. Favorite Band: Bowling for Soup

7. Biggest turn off(s): Talking about exes or current crushes or family members during the sex just dont do it honestly.

8. Top 5 favorite PEZ dispensers: my combination pez dispenser/flashlight/magnifying glass/compass, my giant darth vader that plays the sith theme, my box set of star trek TNG dispensers, my lotr box set, my hobbit box set.

9. Tattoos I want: Anchor with a banner that reads “live pop punk”, notebook paper on my wrist, “all i want is to pet all of the dogs” with puppies over my thigh scars, a pumpkin, and like 300 others tbh
10. Biggest turn on(s)neck kissing/biting/sucking/touching/slightly choking, hipbone rubbing, lip biting, touching me in general tbh
11. Age: E T E R N A L. (18 years old)

12. Ideas of a perfect date: My house with my girl, under my fairy lights, Wayne’s World on Netflix, with kisses and cuddling and touching.

13. Life goal(s)
: kick ass, go to space, represent the human race
14. Piercings I want
: eyebrow again, MAYBE septum, I want to stretch my ears again, nipples after top surgery, downstairs stuff
15. Relationship status
: taken????? kinda???? yeah
16. Favorite movie: Cool Runnings, Labyrinth, Annie, Hairspray, etc. This is the worst question to ask me.

17. A fact about my life
: I’m Hard of Hearing and I have a screw in my skull that i pick at a lot

18. Phobia
: Lightning. So bad. If you see this, please tag it for me.
19. Middle name
: Fuckmaster. (Lawrence)

People that genuinely give a fuck about me.

In no specific order.
1.Big Brother Chris.
3l. Markell
4.Brandon (Peeta)
5. Dillweed
6. Hermit
7. Seabass
8. Keith
9. TeArra (Asshole)
10. Aaron (Asura)

I shit you not everyone on this list has fucked me over before, some more than others, but for the most part I know they love me. That’s more than enough for me to drive myself to be better. I love them all for everything they’ve taught me. I want them to be there for every accomplishment I obtain. Because without them none of it would be possible.

#breakfast. #friedegg with #parsley, #dillweed, #pinkhimalayanseasalt and #babyspinach for #edible #garnish. Served with #foodforlife #7sproutedgrains #toast #bread, #blackcherry #juice, and #tazo #organic #chunmee #greentea with #wildflower #honey from#blueridgehoneycompany. #healthy #food #ilovefood #iphonography #nofilter #delicious #simple (at La Casa Rosa)


admittedly when we first met three/four odd years ago i was super fast to write you off and that was really dumb of me because basically you are just in general a better writer and rper and i love your dumb fucking characters that somehow manage to pull off being both incredibly deep and interesting and also giant dillweeds and i hate how much they grow on me

also i’m sorry i’m a giant flakemonster i really enjoy the pairing we rp occasionally and that should happen more