Words about Pro-Ana that I just needed to get out
I was afraid to fall asleep for almost all of high school because I thought I might pass away in my sleep. I have never been diagnosed with Anorexia Nervosa, but the health defects from my eating disorders (was diagnosed originally with Atypical Anorexia-OSFED and now bulimia) are just as serious. I have no enamel on my molars, I can no longer consume dairy products, I have hemorrhoids from laxative abuse, I have severe memory loss, I have Raynaud’s phenomena, test positive for early onset of arthritis and lupus, among others.
My family would constantly berate me. My twin told me that she liked me better when I was fat. And eventually my friends and family stopped trying to force me to eat. They gave up on me because I had given up on myself.
It’s horrible to think there are people in this world that want an eating disorder. Weight is temporary, so if you want to lose weight, be healthy about it. Think about it this way… the healthiest way to lose weight is 1 pound per week and no more than 15 pounds at a given weight loss period. After six months of remaining stable, weight loss can continue. But still, that means in 15 weeks you can lose 15 pounds and not have all the shitty side effects. If you want a weight loss plan, this is the plan to follow. Do not crash diet, and do not call your crash diet anorexia.
There is so much more I can write about the importance of actually understanding what a mental disorder is and seeking proper diagnosis and treatment. I blame part of the lack of resources on the fact that mental disorders are so stigmatized, but the other part is just naivete. If you are using the internet to post and reblog about pro-ana, then you can use the internet to find proper information about the eating disorder you think you have and that you do not want to give up.
What bothers me most is the use of the words “Ana” and/or “Mia”. First, I have never heard someone with an actual eating disorder refer to their illness in that way. Second, you are taking a mental disease and turning it into a friend. Eating disorders are not cute. You lose your teeth, your hair, your skin color, your warmth, and your glow. You will also lose your personality and your intelligence. There is nothing cute about it.
Many other anti-pro-ana’s have said this before: your boyfriend will not think you are cute when you are skinny. First, the kid is dating you now for the person you are now, changing is not going to make him like you more. Second, if you are looking to get a boyfriend, eating disorders will reduce your sex drive and you will lose interest in boys because you are consumed in your own mess.
Most importantly, eating disorders are mental illnesses which are also classified as diseases. Diseases are what doctors go to school to learn about, diagnose, and treat. The people you should trust most with your mental illness is a doctor. And yes, doctors can be wrong, but you are not limited to one opinion. Also many people argue that some people cannot afford the treatment; like other anti-pro-anas have stated, NEDA will help you find funding and if you really need treatment and want treatment you will get it.
It’s strange to see the same complaints cropping up from the pro-ana community over and over again. Firstly, anti-pro-anas are very rarely rude unless you are rude to them. Secondly, pro-anas all want to be anorexic and take any other diagnosis as a joke. Mental disorders are as equally bad whether or not your like your diagnosis. Stop complaining about the criteria for Anorexia Nervosa. Accept that you have a different disorder and find the help you need to solve that problem. Thirdly, for some reason the greatest form of attack is telling people that they just need to get laid. Getting laid is not going to change the fact that you are a bitch. And finally, this is a public forum, all opinions matter, but some are not accepted on this site. Yes, the freedom of speech bill says you can pretty much say whatever you want. HOWEVER, on this site, you must abide by the rules set by the staff as freedom of speech does not protect you in a forum like this.
And finally, as others have pointed out, eating disorders are not only about losing weight and not eating. It involves a rather complex battle with food. You constantly question whether or not you should eat, not to lose weight, but rather because you are so afraid to gain weight. There are other factors that go into each disorder, but they are not just about being skinny. I have bulimia and believe me, it is not because I want to be skinny (yes, I want to lose weight, but not through purging). Please understand that it is so much more complicated than just weight loss.