dailywrinkle

Oh, the indignity of it all. The not so small pug is so uncouth. Close your eyes and put your tongue away, I tell him. I might as well be talking to a human for all the notice he takes. I guess I’ll just have to sit and suffer in silence. I’ll adopt my very best inscrutable look whilst I contemplate and pretend I’m a canine Buddha. Clearly, I have the wisdom and the wrinkles. I’m just not quite so bald.

I know that I get sad when my human isn’t here, but the morning after she gets back we always have super snuggles. I get to squeeze myself onto her lap, even if she’s busy or if I don’t quite fit, I wriggle all my wrinkles in there and get all extra squishy. The tactic, of course, it to look so super cute that she doesn’t ever want to leave me ever ever again. Maybe this time it will work.

3

Today is the last day of the six nations rugby. My human and her human and the smaller humans took me out for a W.A.L.K earlier, and it was great! So many delicious smells, and an excellent dog in a jumper. For a while I even got to wear a little hat. My human said it was ridiculous but I actually kind of liked it…
Anyway, we’re home now and the humans are shouting at the TV again. I don’t understand how men that are so small get my humans so excited. Sometimes I bark along with them, because it’s the only thing in the TV box that I’m allowed to bark at. But today I just can’t keep my eyes open. Must have been all that sea air…

3

My human has put me on this ridiculous exercise regime. Apparently all the cheese is going straight to my wrinkles… She got all super proud the other day because I’d hit my “target weight”, but the exercise still hasn’t stopped. Apparently exercise is not only good for my wrinkles, but it’s good for my human too. She won’t stop laughing at my post-walk flop situations. She won’t be laughing so much when I get all snoreasaurus on her while she’s trying to write essays.

Hey everyone. I know this is Sybil’s blog but I just wanted to introduce myself. After a week of deliberation, my humans have finally named me Watson. I just wanted to come by and say that no matter what Sybil tells you, we actually SHARE a bed. She keeps saying I’ve stolen this and stolen that. I’ve even “stolen” her stupid purple collar. It has a bell on it so the humans don’t tread on me, but I’m not convinced about the colour. Still, it’s not HER collar. It wouldn’t even fit around her neck. I’m not even sure if she has a neck? She’ll probably say I stole that too.

Sometimes after a long day, my human lies on her tummy. On days like this I like to do my best to lend a helping paw, so I basically sit on her shoulder. When she tries to take a picture, I attack her phone because of the tiny pug inside it. This time she managed to catch my little flat face just seconds before I attacked that other tiny pug and knocked it right out of her hands. That’ll show the stupid tiny pug. My human. I do not share.

My human says we are going on an adventure on Monday. She says it will take the whole day, but that I’ll be really happy I went with her. Apparently we have to pick up a very special parcel…? I don’t know what that means but if it doesn’t involve cheese then I can’t see how I’m going to enjoy it.

Oh by the way! We totally found that other dog. He hurt his paw a little but but he’s safe and sound now. He didn’t have a human before he ran away, which is kinda sad, but after all his adventuring he now has a human and a forever home. How great is that!
6

Yesterday was adventure day! My human says to say sorry that some of the pictures are blurry but that it’s hard to take pictures when you’re in a moving car. Whatever. On to the fun bit.
She woke me up super early and as you can see I was not impressed. Then we went for a morning walk which was so cool, because all the grass was still frozen and it’s extra delicious when it’s frozen.
Then we sat in the car for a really, really long time. I mean I don’t know how long exactly but all I know is I missed dinner time AND stick time. When we eventually got out of the car, there were tiny me’s EVERYWHERE. All these tiny little pug dudes, and we all had a great time. Then my human told me we had to leave and that was sad. So I got in the car and curled up and went to sleep.
When I woke up, I realised the humans had smuggled out one of the other tiny pugs. And he was right there in that crate. I kept telling them they had to go back! But apparently we were supposed to have him?? He’s still here today, and he keeps stealing my bed. He’s going to have to learn some house rules (aka who is boss) pretty quick or I’m going to parcel him up and send him back.