We're accepting of the love that we think we deserve

This quote has been in my head for a long time (I think it’s from a movie or something), and I’m sure it wasn’t meant in this context, but it reminds me of internalized abuse.

Especially now with mega church pastor Creflo Dollar in the news for chocking and beating his daughter - an many of his parishanors speaking out against her calling the police on him… Its really telling to how women, especially black women, are just expected to remain in a certain place or risk physical and emotional abuse. Even with the quote I posted earlier with Beyonce’s praised motherhood vs Erykah Badu’s vilified motherhood - black women get degraded to unspeakable levels for stepping out of such narrowly drawn lines.

Imagine growing up in that life. With controlling fathers and mothers who co-sign that ideology. It’s hard to develop a legitimate belief that you DON’T deserve to be treated that way, or accept that treatment from lovers, friends, society. It’s hard to say “how dare you treat me that way” when that how you’ve always been treated. and its hard to feel safe when you’re used to those you care about hurting you. What does love even mean when abuse is almost always a part of the package anyway? These are things that need to be unlearned - but our society only reinforces these ideas everywhere you turn anyway.

It takes a village to raise a child but if that entire village promotes toxic relationships, abuse and the emotional manipulation of you girls… She’s better off on her own.

Rev. Creflo Dollar has been arrested and charged with punching and choking his 15-year-old daughter. His daughter called police after the domestic dispute, claiming that the two were fighting over whether or not she could attend a party. The pastor has been charged with simple battery and cruelty toward children, and booked in the Fayette County Jail.

Police claim that the pastor’s daughter called them after he tackled her to the floor, punched her, and hit her with a shoe. Officers say that they saw a scratch to the girl’s neck and throat that confirmed her claims.


Praying the Perfect Prayer

by Creflo Dollar

The world is in turmoil. Virtually every headline in today’s media broadcasts signifies reports of gloom and doom. However, during this time, you can receive wisdom and insight. God’s wisdom will enlighten your path so you will know what to do when you do not know what to do. This light, or wisdom, that only comes from God is available to you through the Holy Spirit. Proverbs 20:5 states,“Counsel in the heart of man is like deep water; but a man of understanding will draw it out.” Like pulling water from a deep well, you can draw out of your spirit solutions to life’s problems by praying the perfect prayer, which is praying in the spirit (also known as praying in tongues). 

Praying in the spirit is one of the best ways to pray because you pray the perfect will of God. Not only that, but you also pray about things you are not aware of. Through tongues, the Holy Spirit intercedes for others through you in a way that is superior to anything you could pray in your own language. The enemy cannot interfere with this type of prayer because he does not know what you are saying! In fact, your own mind, will, and emotions cannot get in the way of your prayer. Moreover, praying in the spirit is an act of faith.

When you pray in tongues, you are praying in your heavenly language—a language you did not know before. It is a supernatural ability that fine-tunes your ability to receive instructions from the Lord. While praying this powerful prayer, you depend solely on the wisdom of God, not on your own intellect. Human wisdom will fail in these last days. That is why it is crucial for you to have the wisdom that comes directly from the Lord operating in your life. 

Because of the misconceptions about praying in tongues, many people shy away from, and even get offended when you mention this subject. However, the ability to speak in an unknown tongue is a gift from God, and evidence that the Holy Spirit dwells on the inside of you. This prayer connects you to the mysteries of God. “For one who speaks in an [unknown] tongue speaks not to men but to God, for no one understands or catches his meaning, because in the [Holy] Spirit he utters secret truths and hidden things [not obvious to the understanding]” (1 Corinthians 14:2, AMP). 

Every born-again Christian possesses the ability to pray in tongues, including you! This perfect prayer is directed by the Holy Spirit, not you. Romans 8:26, AMP, states, “So too the [Holy] Spirit comes to our aid and bears us up in our weakness; for we do not know what prayer to offer nor how to offer it worthily as we ought, but the Spirit Himself goes to meet our supplication and pleads in our behalf with unspeakable yearnings and groanings too deep for utterance.” 

When you pray in tongues, release your faith and ask God to give you the interpretation of those things you pray. He will speak things to your spirit that may surprise you. You will receive revelation knowledge from Heaven, hidden wisdom to get ahead in life.

Praying in tongues is a grace gift. The revealed knowledge you receive through praying the perfect prayer will give you the edge you need to rise above today’s challenges. Any Christian, at any time, can pray to the Lord and receive this grace gift. Any Christian who has already received it can use it at any time. So, what are you waiting for?

Practical Keys to Overcoming Sexual Sin
By Pastor Creflo Dollar:

Many Christians struggle with sexual immorality, not knowing that God has given us the grace to live sexually pure lives. Too often we allow the norms and values of society to dictate our behavior, while God has called us to a lifestyle that agrees with His Word. We have been set free from sin and are no longer subject to our old nature; however, we must renew our minds and put corresponding action to our faith.

Understanding what the Word has to say about sexual sin is the first step to overcoming it. If there was ever any doubt about whether it is wrong or not, all we have to do is open up the Bible for the answer to that question. First Corinthians 6:18-20 says, “Flee fornication. Every sin that a man doeth is without the body; but he that commits fornication sins against his own body. What? Know ye not that your body is the temple of the Holy Ghost which is in you, which ye have of God, and ye are not your own? For ye are bought with a price: therefore glorify God in your body, and in your spirit, which are God’s.” Fornication involves any sexual activity with someone you are not married to. Our bodies do not belong to us but to God, which means we will be held accountable for what we did with them.

There are many other scriptures that talk about the importance of abstaining from fornication and making sure our lives reflect Christ’s character. Ephesians 5:3 says that fornication and sexual impurity should not be named among Believers, and 1 Thessalonians 4:3 says that it is God’s will that we abstain from fornication. Since we know it is wrong, the next question is, how do we get out of it?

The spiritual part of the issue has already been dealt with by Jesus. As Christians, we have been spiritually liberated from sin; however, we must maintain our deliverance on a daily basis, which is our responsibility. By putting these practical keys into practice, we can walk in the full manifestation of complete deliverance from sexual immorality until Jesus returns.

1. Commit to the process of mind renewal. Romans 12:1 & 2 instructs us to renew our minds so that we can prove what the acceptable and perfect will of God is. Abstaining from fornication is the perfect will of God, so by constantly meditating on the Scriptures day and night regarding sexual purity, our thinking will begin to align with God’s Word. As a result, we will begin to make choices that support our stance. Mind renewal is not a one-time event but an ongoing process that we must actively engage in on a daily basis.

2. Cast down thoughts by speaking the Word. Second Corinthians 10:4 instructs us to cast down thoughts and imaginations that go against the Word. When sexually immoral thoughts and feelings rise up within you, don’t sit there and receive them. Open your mouth and declare the Word of God over your life. Do this as many times as necessary in order to bring those thoughts into obedience to the Word.

3. Establish boundaries. One of the biggest changes we can make in our lives involves the people we are in relationship with, as well as the things we look at, listen to, and talk about. If you are serious about committing to a lifestyle of sexual purity, you have to disconnect from those people, places, and things that create an environment that causes you to be vulnerable to sin. We must set boundaries to protect our decision to remain sexually pure.

The world would have us believe that living a sexually pure life is impossible, but with God all things are possible. It takes a quality decision and a plan. By implementing the Word of God into your daily life and making choices that support holiness in your life, you can experience freedom from sexual sin.

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Change your thinking (part 3) - Creflo Dollar

A GREAT idea from What About Our Daughters blog....

If you’re outraged by the crucification of Creflo Dollar’s daughter, please take time to write a brief thank you note to Sheriff Wayne Hannah whannah@fayettecountyga.gov thanking he and his deputies for answering this young woman’s distress call.

A Black girl was in crisis. They responded.

They didn’t ignore her or throw her under the bus and now they are catching grief about it from the Civil Rights Industrial Complex . It doesn’t have to be a long note just a “Thank you for responding to Creflo Dollar’s daughter’s call for assistance. The Georgia NAACP is wrong.” and leave it at that.

i sent my thank you email this morning :)

Meet Some Of The Richest Ministers In America

Meet Some Of The Richest Ministers In America

God can make you rich. Most people think of that sentence in the spiritual sense. No, this article is about the physical worldly dollar and cents wealth.

It might be argued that the reason why ministers are more likely to have a good is because  they  a heavy burden of taking care of family and grounds.  For wealthy ministers, financial problems involve greater amounts of money. Some of which…

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Yet Another Reason why the Church is Irrelevant

"Sensibilities toward violence have changed so much that religious people today compartmentalize their attitude to the Bible. They pay it lip service as a symbol of morality, while getting their actual morality from more modern principles." - Steven Pinker, The Better Angels of Our Nature

And just like that, people forgot about Creflo Dollar almost as quickly as they did Eddie Long.

Yet Creflo Dollar is Creflo Dollar. He is flamboyant, unwavering, arrogant, and bullheaded. If you don’t believe me, do a google search on the audio he flaunts that is a recording of people being tormented in hell. Everyone in his congregation bought it.

The crazy thing about is alleged domestic violence charge is that like Eddie Long, Dollar doesn’t deny anything. Dollar actually says that he should have never been arrested. While it is true that none of us were present and it’s his word against his daughters, Dollar and many religious leaders who not only preach the prosperity gospel but stick the evangelical side of things, believe that no one should mettle in their family’s business. Like many religious leaders and community activists, Dollar feels that family business should remain family business. No one should be airing dirty laundry.

In both Long and Dollar’s court cases, the church as well as the Black and Brown community had an opportunity to discuss sexual and physical abuse, but lost this opportunity in faux black nationalism and religious patriarchy. While both cases have yet to be fully explored in a court of law, both parties have refused to even acknowledge the crimes they have been accused of. Their supporters refused to question anything and the rest of us have forgotten these crimes.

My point isn’t to prove that Long and Dollar are guilty but that we should discuss these issues. We should challenge the church when it comes to abuse and misogyny. Instead we are drowned in outdated scriptures and platitudes. Dollar’s only explanation is to blame the “culture” on individualism and selfishness. We are given parables of false prophets and told that it is the forces of Satan that are invading our homes.

I am clear on the idea that the church was never created to allow debate and criticism. That’s why the leaders are called preachers and the congregants are considered sheep. The church wasn’t built on debate only the consolidation of power. Again, this exclaims that the church is outdated especially in the 21st century whether white or black. Here we had two opportunities to really challenge the church. Instead many of us accepted the nonsense or the church just redoubled their efforts to silence the criticism.

Well, welcome to the terrordome.