Newt grips the gun, sweat coats the palms of his hand as he shakes, panic and anxiety threatening to burst open his chest, bringing everything out with it. He swallows hard, something blocks up his throat and suddenly his voice is sewn into the inside of his chest.
“Please kill me.” Thomas’s voice is desperate, begging, Newt doesn’t like this side of his friend at all.
“You know I can’t bloody do that!” Suddenly he’s able to speak, the stitches that held back his voice burn cold against the lining of his skin, “Look, we’ll take you-”
“NEWT.” The almost inhuman voice sends shivers down the blond’s spine, but he doesn’t as much move an inch from where he’s standing, “if you were ever my friend, listen to me, you need to do this, fucking kill me.”
Thomas latches onto Newt, fingers digging into Newt’s skin leaving purple bruises beneath them, “Bloody hell.” Newt hisses as he throws Thomas off of him and watches the boy collapse onto the ground. Sudden sadness hits him hard as he looks down at the brunet, eyes gone mad, lacking the playfulness and curiosity they once held, aggressiveness and absolute hatred because Newt still hasn’t pulled the trigger. How could he let it come to this, his best friend, a person who meant so much to him, his Tommy.
His eyes moisten with tears, “Alright, Look, I can’t do this, anyone but you.” His voice breaks as he puts more hope then he has into anything else, he doesn’t care that Thomas helped wicked, he doesn’t care that he’s a crank, they’ll find a way, they always do.
“KILL ME.” Empty eyes bore into him, any last trace of sanity was surely gone, his Tommy no longer existed.
“Please, tommy, please.” Newt begs and closes his eyes, “Don’t make me do this.”
He takes a deep breath and gets no sane response, just the same aggressive painful shrieking for death. He grips his gun again, hands shaking something massive, he’s scared he’ll drop it. Blood pounds in his ears as he points the gun at the ground below him, eyes still closed.
He thinks of his Tommy, brown hair, big eyes, determined, hopeful, a little on the slow side, but smart none the less.
Newt aches with every ounce of his soul to hear the others voice again, see the goofy smile, feel the warm skin. but instead all he hears is a gun shot, the feel of warm blood on his hands and face, sees nothing but black.
and with that the world stopped and Newt’s heart shattered.
// if anyones down to kill me for writing this, go right ahead