As requested by anon. :)
[Previously: Espada prison break]
The captains have been arrested! What were they arrested for, and how will they escape from prison?
1. Ukitake (Arrested for assisting Kaien’s suicide)
Escapes by: Faking an illness.
Luckily, Ukitake can cough blood on command, which means that he is taken to a hospital, which has lower security. This allows Ukitake to make his escape.
2. Kyoraku (Arrested for murdering a man, a kid, and a bunch of wolves)
Escapes by: Knocking out the prison electricity.
He then escapes in the darkness.
3. Kenpachi (Arrested for assault)
Escapes by: Breaking through the wall.
He just sorta walks right through the prison wall. He was actually trying to get the dining hall, but he was super lost.
4. Aizen (Arrested for treason)
Escapes by: Making a deal.
As it turns out, Aizen has such valuable information that he is able to leverage his knowledge for an early release. He has to wear an ankle monitor, though.
5. Hitsugaya (Arrested for breaking and entering)
Escapes by: Not going to prison in the first place.
Despite his loud protests to the contrary, Hitsugaya is not tried as an adult, and the jury actually finds it kinda cute that he thought he was a detective. He’s given community service.
6. Byakuya (Arrested for tax evasion)
Escapes by: Hiring really good lawyers.
As it turns out, Byakuya is just too rich - and his crime too white collar - for him to go to prison.
7. Shinji (Arrested for stalking Ichigo)
Escapes by: Having help on the outside.
Urahara helps him escape. Now Shinji owes him for life.
8. Soi Fon (Arrested for stalking Urahara)
Escapes by: Hiding in the laundry.
She’s pretty sure she invented that technique.
9. Rose (Arrested for a noise complaint. It was a, um, bad one)
Escapes by: Using a guitar pick to dig his way to freedom.
It takes a very long time.
10. Kurotsuchi (Arrested for poison and assault and forced imprisonment and torture and illegal experiments and unlawful surveillance and )
Escapes by: Drugging the guards.
He uses a different drug for each guard, in fact, because he wants to see which one will work the best.
11. Kensei (Arrested for punching a guy)
Escapes by: Getting assigned to the prison kitchen.
He then smuggles himself out by hiding under a whole bunch of potato peels.
12. Unohana (Arrested for serial murder)
Escapes by: Murdering everyone in the prison.
They maybe should have seen that one coming
13. Gin (Arrested for treason)
Escapes by: Nobody knows.
He just keeps leaving the prison….and then coming back. He’s been interrogated like nineteen times, but he just won’t say where he’s always going.
14. Tosen (Arrested for treason)
Escapes by: Becoming a spokesman for prison reform.
He writes a book and then becomes a media sensation. He wants to change the system from the inside out. Instead, he’s released and then everybody forgets about him.
15. Yamamoto (Arrested for illegally creating zombies)
Escapes by: Pretending to be old and decrepit.
Then, when Sasakibe smuggles in a sword disguised as a cane, Yamamoto suddenly rips off his shirt, reveals his abs, and makes his escape.
16. Komamura (Arrested for being outside without a leash)
Escapes by: Having opposable thumbs.
It’s pretty easy to escape a dog kennel, actually.
17. Yoruichi (Arrested for public nudity)
Escapes by: Having the ability to transform into a cat.
Everybody is all, “How did a cat get into this prison?? We’d better let it go!”
18. Urahara (Arrested for smuggling and selling stolen goods)
Escapes by: Being friends with Yoruichi.
When she escapes, she brings him along for the ride.