Now, I typically write advice for the ladies but I’ve been asked this question “how do I be a good client, what should I/should I not do?” in my inbox quite often lately. So I figured I’d just make a public post. Now, please take this with a grain of salt. Sometimes I try to be a little funny and I may or may not represent the ideas of all escorts out there.
On to the list:
1.) Do give the provider you are trying to schedule with at least 24 hours notice. This is pretty standard across the industry. Most providers have another career, school, kids, etc. We don’t sit at home all day in a full face of makeup with our best lingerie on just waiting. In many metropolitan cities, it can take an hour just to drive across the city. If you only give two hours notice, it makes us think a.) He’s a jerk and if he doesn’t care enough to give me notice, he’ll be a jerk during the appointment b.) He’s bored, looked at my ad and contacted me, without doing any research. c.) He doesn’t care about his or my safety. It’s almost impossible to screen this quickly unless you have P411/Datecheck/RS2k.
2.) Do not contact a provider after 10 pm, especially via phone. I have never actually had an appointment with anyone who contacted me via phone or email past 10pm. Most providers will assume you are high and/or drunk. If you are a night shift worker, please tell us, that’s a whole different ballgame.
3.) Do not write sexual stuff in the email or ask for specific services, unless you are very tactful. I know some guys “test” providers by asking for bareback. That’s really stupid because it will put you on the blacklist ASAP, don’t do it. By discussing sexual things, it makes us suspicious that you are LE.
4.) Never mention drugs. In fact, don’t do drugs either. I’ve had clients offer to pay me in drugs or ask me to bring drugs. Guess what? Many providers don’t do drugs, period. Also, you are becoming a safety hazard and a legal risk by bringing drugs to an appointment.
5.) Read the provider’s website prior to contacting her. If I had a nickel for every time a guy asked me what my donation was, I’d be a helluva lot richer. The onus is on you to do a little research. We have websites so all of that info is at your fingertips.
6.) Do not ask the provider to provide services or appointments she doesn’t typically provide. If she doesn’t do anal, don’t ask for it. If she doesn’t do half hours, don’t ask for it. It seems so simple yet is often disregarded.
7.) Be on time. Also, let her know if you’ll be late. If you are more than 10 minutes late, do not expect her to give you the full session. She may or may not, depending on her schedule.
8.) DO NOT finger her asshole without lube. I cannot believe I have to actually say this. Literally, 99% of the clients (including physicians) who try to finger my ass go raw before I scold them. It’s painful, don’t do it.
9.) If she asks you to stop doing something or be more gentle, please listen. We’re pretty tolerant so when we actually have to verbalize it, it’s over the limit.
10.) Be aware of time. We don’t like overstayers. If you wanted a 90 minute appointment, that’s what you should have booked. If it’s a few minutes, that’s fine. But trying to keep the appointment going is a no-no.
11.) Please make sure the donation is given up front. It’s awkward to have to ask for it.
12.) Hygiene. Yes, it might take 5 minutes to shower but it’s well worth it. Presumably, few clients are homosexual so you wouldn’t know what sweaty ballsack smells like. Trust me, you don’t want to know. Keep it clean. Also, if you have some rash or skin condition, please let us know. I had a client with severe psoriasis and while I knew what it was, most providers probably wouldn’t.