DCON2013

The CaliNevHa DCon was SO MUCH FUN!!:D I met a lot of new people and made a lot of friends and sold and bought a lot of buttons and got pinned a lot and learned a lot!:) The workshops were sometimes fun and the guest speaker was just what I needed!:) He was so inspirational and so uplifting!:D At first it was kinda awkward because I didn’t know who to talk to or how but then I realized no one is going to judge me here, we’re like a big ohana and we stand together. So I took a “Free Hugs” sign from one of our members and walked around and made new friends and took a lot of pictures…but I didnt take pictures, other people did…i wasnt even dressed up that much, just my governor’s ball dress and they just wanted my picture…okay. Got a few digits from some people(; oh, hello. But one of the best things about this event was that…every single person I talked to…was so positive…and sweet. Honestly, all of the people that I hugged…they all said I was really pretty or cute and that just made me feel…happy. I smiled and just felt so happy, in my life…i was actually sincerely happy. Especially since some pretty attractive guys called me cute;] I mean, the sincerity in their voices as they said “oh my gosh, you’re so cute!!” makes me feel…different. Honestly, one of the real reasons why I’m depressed besides just because is because I’m self conscious and I always hated how I looked. When you hear the words “Oh, you’re so fat.” or “you’re so ugly.” or “you’re so gross, ew.” when you were in kindergarten…first grade…second grade…third…fourth(definitely fourth, fuck you raymond school elementary. one of your fourth grade teachers was so biased.)…fifth….sixth…seventh…and eighth…and a little bit of ninth grade, you kinda accept it and say its a fact. Like you’ll never become pretty or skinny or attractive, Kat. Just because. Because you were told that all your life. Even your 5 year old second cousin told you, and you know that kids are the most honest people in this world. But this weekend. This DCon weekend…this  March 22-24th of 2013…I actually felt…pretty on the outside. Kids are cruel. Bullying is sick(and not in the good way). It just creates problems and makes everything just…disgusting. Maybe we shouldn’t judge people by what they look like or what they heard from other people about them; but what they say, what they do, and how they talk. But sadly, the world is not like that, and it possibly will never be like that because we’re human and we have our flaws. Anyway, got asked to dance with someone, rejected them because 1.) I suck at dancing with people 2.) It was awkward 3.) his friend was the one who told me. That was really sweet though…All the free hugs I gave away were mostly to guys…attractive guys;) AHAHAHA…no…just people and they all loved me. I got to know my roomies a lot more and we became really close:) We shared clothes and just had a great time talking and eating and just doing whatever in our room past curfew.:) Some guys in the same hall kept flirting with my roomies and me…HAHAHAHA…no thank you, I’m not really into long distance relationships…They just don’t do any good for me. Anyway, this was more of the emotional things that went on during dcon…and it was great.

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