anonymous said:

of course i'm fucking defensive and upset when people continue to cheapen my experience. why the fuck should i be happy and welcoming to them? for the sake of niceness? am i meant to feel some sort of connection to them because they ExPeRiEnCe SeXuAl AtTrAcTiOn RaReLy or sometimes they're aroused by things that dont make them aroused? hahahaha wtf?? i don't give a shit about it within my own community

let me get this strait… u got this person who experiences sexual attraction one or twice. rite? and u got two other people: a person who has never experienced sexual attraction, and someone who experiences it often (how mch is often anyway?). u decide that this person is more closely related to the person who HAS NEVER experienced sexual attraction, and not the person who HAS experienced it. why? how did you come to this conclusion? what the fuck can we talk about?

these people have much more to talk about to *allosexuals* than they to do me. why? because they’re not asexual. i mean… if ur own agrument is “let’s be welcoming let’s not invalidate their identities” then u need to knock it the fuck off. period!!! i’m not welcoming them nor am i invalidating their ‘identities’ by doing so. they’re not asexual. get the pic?

u act like this is something i’m deciding on my own. mind u.. i have seen numerous asexuals talking about it. in reality, u guys r the ones deciding this shit on ur own. u got two types of people here: people who don’t want their space invade and people who don’t give a shit. why do u care more about demisexuals/lithosexuals/etc than you do for asexuals?

Woot everybody take cover, it’s the popo

Now, down to business.

Now, you don’t welcome these people out of simple “niceness”. You welcome them because they rightly belong under the Asexual Community, as they fall within the Umbrella. They rarely experience sexual attraction, but other than that, they are functionally asexual.
Kiowa says it pretty well o’er here. But in case you are lazy, let me sum it up.
Sure, they could have experienced sexual attraction once or twice, but after that, zip. Nada. Nothing.

There is no sexual attraction at all.

Whoop, there we go, definition of asexuality right there, Frog Flippin’ Fantastic!

It doesn’t “cheapen” your experience, it simply means that their situation is slightly different from yours. They still face the different problems just because they still don’t fit as an Allosexual.

Asexuals face a variety of issues, and look another Kiowa link, aw yeah. Because there aren’t just singular problems, that you can just say, “I can only relate to some of the Ace problems, does that make me less of an ace? Absolutely not! Aces experience a variety of problems, and while it might not be shared by all aces, doesn’t make them any less of an ace problem.

It’s like saying, say my bitter chocolate bar is a bit lacking in fat, though it’s not a real bitter chocolate problem. Real bitter chocolate problems are when there is no sugar at all, and that just makes it unsweetened chocolate.
Also, it’s like you’re saying, this chocolate can’t be real bitter chocolate, if it has nuts! What’s it more related to, bitter chocolate without the nuts, or Nuts! It’s more related to nuts, you see, because real bitter chocolate is not supposed to have nuts. Even if it still tastes like bitter chocolate with nuts, it doens’t belong in the bitter chocolate community. Period.

For example you have the extremities of 7, and you have 777.

And let us say there are different in between numbers given, but they’re nearer 7 than they’ll ever be to 777. Will you say they belong to the 777 family, or the 7 family, hmm? Think about that.

We don’t care more for them than asexuals, because they are part of the asexual umbrella, and thus we give them equal care.

I hope I have made my point. You can have these opinions, but you can’t police who belongs in the Ace community, and who does not, since they still are functionally asexual, and thus can belong if they choose to join the community.

- Blu Cactus.

Going to jump in on this one as well, although I think that thus far, Kiowa, Southie, and Blu Cactus (above) have covered just about everything I would say.

Honestly, my “advice” to you is that this community - the community built around this blog - is clearly not one that you want to be a part of, if this is how you choose to react to what we have to say.

We strive to be an open, welcoming, inclusive community, welcoming all who fall under the umbrella of asexuality. We “act” like this is something you are deciding on your own because you are coming into OUR community and trying to tell ALL OF US how our community should be run, by demanding that we exclude people. The fact of the matter is, your opinions are harmful to others, and that is the opposite of what we strive for here. And you can exclude people from your own community if you would like, but we will continue our outreach and welcoming to ALL people who feel they belong here.

- Di