There are a lot of dangers inherent to being a Numerologist. Especially of the kind that, on occasion, mucks around with the stuff of the mind. The boys and I, we definitely have a more detailed understanding of the landscape of each others’ minds than a lot of couples, I can say that much- but it’s not without risk. There have been times where connections were imperfect- rushed, slipshod, or- well, at times I couldn’t even begin to describe what had happened, but it seems that the structures of the mind- or at least mine, are particularly susceptible to being shaken loose.
The first time, I was just disoriented. I couldn’t tell what was happening around me, but it soon wore off, though the headache lingered for a while after. The second time, it was so jarring that I lost what some words were in common Aetolian. Small things had shaken loose, but things I never thought would- for an hour or two, until I realised and he told me again, I’d forgotten his name. We’d been together some fifteen, twenty years at that point? You don’t forget something like that without help.
The third time, it was on purpose- I wanted to forget, and he wanted to help me. That one fouled for different reasons, and I was stuck for a few years and laid up for several after that- the body atrophies if you don’t use it for a while, and I found that out the hard way.
I am not entirely sure if there was really a fourth time- the circumstances of that are something I have forgotten as well, and it escapes me how to even begin trying to figure out what went wrong, or why. I have the inkling that I might have enacted it myself, and I’m aware that I forgot… almost everything. He helped me find it again, in the mists and sands of the back of my mind, but it was not complete- even now, I will reach for a word and realise that I have completely forgotten the word for coccyx. I’m lucky, I suppose, that it just seem like old age when I do it, and someone nearby happily supplies the word I want, but sometimes I wonder just how much is gone- I’d never know, when it comes down to it. And that’s somewhat terrifying.