In 2012, poetry was considered to be “the most who gives a shit thing besides Facebook game invites” so the National Poetry Pussies (NPP) hired Brad Pitt and Taylor Momsen to do poetry and make it not suck.
“I know I haven’t updated regularly but I have been busy
jerking off to this Taylor Momsen video
having a wank to this Taylor Momsen video
adjusting the contrast on this Taylor Momsen video to see if I can ‘see pussy’
watching Brad’s new Chanel No 5 video.
There. Good save, Tom. As I stated above, I have been a normal person just doing normal stuff. Brad’s hotly anticipated Chanel No. 5 video hit the internet and since then I’ve just been
staring longingly at Brad Pitt
wondering “Is this a message from Brad to me, like, personally?”
wondering “Is Brad happy?”
deciding “Brad can’t possibly be happy without me.
jerking off to Taylor Momsen.
Um. Here is READ MORE.”
If you agree that poetry is the worst and fiction novels about socialites are the best, please buy my book.