Bleach characters in a pawn shop

As requested by anon. : )

Bleach characters are visiting a world of the living pawn shop to sell…something. Here is how that might go!

1. Rukia

Rukia: Hi! I want to sell this broom and this lamp and this tiny window!

Pawn shop guy: Um….all of these say “Karakura Town High School” on them. Did you steal this stuff?

Rukia: Is it stealing if you were a student there?

Pawn shop guy: Yeah.


Rukia: You sound just like Ichigo.

2. Chad

Chad: I am here to sell this bear suit.

Chad: Sadly, my snuggling partner has died.

Chad: Seeing this now brings me only sadness.

Chad: Rather than snuggling joy.

Chad: And I just don’t think he would have wanted that.

Pawn shop guy:

Pawn shop guy: Why do they always want to tell me their story?

3. Riruka

Riruka: Hi!

Pawn shop guy: Hi.

Riruka: I came here to sell some of my stuffed animals because I realized that I have too many!

Pawn shop guy: Okay.

Riruka: But now that I’m here I realize that I cannot sell them and also that I’m probably going to buy everything cute that you have in this shop!

Riruka: So sell me your cute things and say NOTHING to me about how I’m doing this!

Pawn shop guy: There’s a shopping basket in the corner.

4. Grimmjow

Grimmjow: Yo. Would you like to buy a giant throne?

Grimmjow: My boss left it behind when he went to jail.

Pawn shop guy:

Pawn shop guy: How did you carry that in here?

Grimmjow: What, like that’s hard?

5. Giselle

Giselle: Hiiiiiiiii. Do you take zombies?

Pawn shop guy: What, like zombie figurines or a zombie mask?

Giselle: No, actual zombies.

Giselle: They’re outside, eating your flowers.

Pawn shop guy: Excuse me?

6. Byakuya

Byakuya: If I wished to sell this captain’s coat, what price would you give me?

Pawn shop guy: How about 2,000 yen?


Byakuya: Is that a lot of money in the human world?

Pawn shop guy: Not really. But then, the coat is clearly used since you’re wearing it right now.

Byakuya: So it is a small amount of money?

Pawn shop guy: Yeah, is that a problem?

Byakuya: No.

Byakuya: I now have definitive proof that this coat is cheap. Thank you. Goodbye.

Pawn shop guy: That was weird.

7. Yachiru

Yachiru: Want some vintage candy wrappers?

Pawn shop guy: Are they from the candy you just ate outside my store?

Yachiru: Yup!

Pawn shop guy: No.

Pawn shop guy: I have a trash can though.

Yachiru: I guess that works.

8. Hitsugaya

Hitsugaya: I am, um, here to sell this, um…..decorative statue.

Pawn shop guy: This appears to be a statue of you.

Pawn shop guy: Weird present or narcissism you now regret?


Hitsugaya: J-just name your price, okay?!

9. Ukitake

Ukitake: Hi! I’m here to sell - 


Ukitake: Is that the statue I gave Hitsugaya as a present?

Pawn shop guy: Um



Ukitake: I-I can’t believe it!

Ukitake: Akon made more than one?

Ukitake: Weird.

10. Aizen

Aizen: Hello, I’m here to sell this.

Pawn shop guy: Sell what?

Aizen: This.

Pawn shop guy:

Pawn shop guy: You want to to sell the large tattooed guy standing next to you?

Renji: [waves sadly]

Aizen: Yeah, he made a terrible pawn.

Pawn shop guy: Please leave.

need new blogs to follow!!

hey i need new blogs to follow, if you post/reblog any of the following like/ reblog this or follow me, i will check your blog and follow you too!!

akame ga kill
akatsuki no yona
avatar the last airbender
denki gai no honya san
fairy tail
fate stay night
fullmetal alchemist
hitsugi no chaika 
nanatsu no taizai
ookami shoujo to kuro ouji
psycho pass
shingeki no kyojin
the legend of korra
tokyo ghoul

thank you!! 

Bleach characters, you just learned that Soi Fon has been the big bad of Bleach this whole time! Your reactions?

As requested by anon. :)

In my “big bad" series, we imagine that Bleach’s main villain isn’t Yhwach or Aizen or the Soul King or anyone you’d expect. No, it’s someone totally random and unexpected. This time, we’re going to pretend that Bleach’s secret big bad is Soi Fon, and everybody just found out. How will they react?

Kiyone: Oh. Wow. Soi Fon, a villain? The shock is overpowering.

Kiyone: So overpowering it feels like a tiny ninja shoe trying to crush my windpipe.

Kiyone: Where have I felt that before?

Kiyone: Oh yeah. When Soi Fon TRIED TO CRUSH MY THROAT


Rukia: She *was* one of the few people who really seemed to want me executed, you know?

Rukia: Like when I got rescued, most people seemed secretly relieved. But not Soi Fon. She seemed pretty…angry.

Gin: Well it’s hard when you’re all excited to see someone killed and then the person gets rescued.

Gin: It’s just like going to a concert and finding out it’s been canceled because of rain.


Yoruichi: Soi Fon…is the big bad? 

Yoruichi: Is this because of how I left her? Did that make her decide to destroy everyone?

Yoruichi: Am I the tragic villain backstory?


Yoruichi: Harsh.

Hachigen: You know, I thought it was weird that she wanted to lock one of her allies in a box.

Urahara: She did also stalk me once in an attempt to get me fired.

Unohana: Her zanpakuto power only works for straight-up killing. It does not mess around.

Ukitake: I-I guess we all should have seen this coming!

Ggio: Whoa, she’s a villain? That’s so cool! 

I mean…

Ggio: Whatever. It’s not like I’m even a little mad that she didn’t ask me to be her evil sidekick.

Omaeda: Now that the captain is openly evil, she’s gonna stop holding back on the death and destruction, huh?

Omaeda: I think I should maybe take a very long vacation. Very far away.

Ichigo: Everybody relax! I got this!

Ichigo: I mean, sure her power is a two-touch kill, and sure I normally get stabbed way more than often than that when I first start fighting!

Ichigo: And sure she has some sort of unique shunko power that’s kido based, and sure I don’t know how to use any kido myself.

Ichigo: And sure she’s really really fast, which is usually one of my major advantages.

Ichigo: And yes. Her bankai is a giant rocket launcher. And sure. I’ve never fought someone’s bankai without getting hit by it a couple of times. 

Ichigo: But I’m sure I…can…handle…this….


Ichigo: Maybe Yoruichi can help me with this one.