J: “I knew ye belonged here, with me, almost since the first time I laid eyes on ye. That’s one of the reasons I agreed to marry ye. Though not the main one.”
C: “Then what was the main one?”
J: “Because I wanted you more than I ever wanted anything in my life. Right from that moment I fell off the horse and… Woke up in the dark looking up at your face. Then there was that long ride together, with that lovely round arse wedged tight between my thighs, and that rock-solid head thumping me in the chest. I wanted ye from the first moment I saw ye. But… I loved ye when ye wept in my arms that first night at Leoch. But now I… I wake up every day, and I find that I love you more than I did the day before.”

Ok, so to what just happened to me:

There was a man who sat down beside me on my bus ride back home (from seeing aaou, yay) that would pretend falling asleep to slip his hand between us and caress my thigh with the back of his hand.
Eh, pretty vanilla. Pretty coward approach to.
I elbowed him, he took his and back to himself. Tried again in a minute, I elbowed him again. Tried again a little while I took his and and replaced it.
Fourth time I looked at him, replaced his hand and said “stay awake and keep your hands to yourself” he stammered when he said “yes”.
All the while I kept texting my friends about the movie, smiling at my cellphone. I wanted to look as unphazed as possible. I thought about changing seat but no. I would not do that (I though about Cap “no, you move.”)
He tried again but he was getting nervous, he would shift and look at the road. He clutched at his backpack.
Now he might be aroused but I think he was nervous. He was not expecting that I would stand up.
He tried to change approach: “where do you get off?” I told him “where do YOU get off?”
He was silent for a while and asked if I wanted to come home with him.
He changed approach to change the mood, I think. I want to believe I made him nervous.

Now, this is not my first time dealing with sexual harassment. Damn, someone grabbed my ass and run away just this tuesday!! But this was different. I was virtually without nowhere to go. For over 45 minutes. I’m proud of how I reacted, I took no shit.
Still, I’m pretty shaken because it had been a long time since something like this.

So, idk, if you’d like to drop by and congratulate me on my badassness, tell me a joke or tell me a random thing about your day, that would be cute :)

Run Through Sprinklers

Grass blades in the kiddie pool
Plumerias in full bloom
Pride rock between the pine trees
Coco is barking at the hidden ‘coons
I hear the windchimes play a minor key
And I remember the king snake in the aloe tree
I pick up the blade to saw my hair
And then I
Put it away
Bathing suit damp between my thighs
Legs have begun to chafe
It was a birthday gift for a fatter kid
I have 58 pounds to stave it away
The 4-door sedans are speeding down the lane once again
So pride rock calls my name
I pick up the blade to scar the pines
And then I
Put it away
I wave to the men and women
With the honor kids
Who pass me by
And I don’t know where they stay
But I don’t imagine they’ve picked up
The blade to bear the ties
Or that they’ve too put them away

anonymous asked:

My girlfriend and I were just getting back from being at our friend's house. Him in the front. His Mom driving us home. She kept taking away my glasses. I kept telling her she oughta stop. She didn't. So I shoved my hand between her thighs and gave her a rough and bumpy ride all the way home. She doesn't take away my glasses anymore. ... Well... Unless she wants some more. Xoxo~


in 50………no…60 years im going to be a crusty old man and probably still drawing self indulgant sexie karkats. theres a very special place for me in hell

(not r63 fuk off my ass)

All I want is for stores to start selling clothing that caters to girls with big thighs and an ass, and a smaller waist
This is fucking bullshit, I can never find shorts that don’t hike up between my thighs, unlike 90% of the world population, I HAVE A LARGE FUCKING ASS, SO START MAKING CLOTHING FOR CURVY GIRLS YO WTF I WANT WAIST HIGH SHORTS THAT FIT WELL, NOT ONES THAT I HAVE TO SHRINK WITH A BELT

Loveless Marriage as told by Ginger...

“My poor Jamie… trapped in a loveless marriage” 

(More like trapped between his wife thighs)

forced to share his bed with a cold, English bitch.

(You see how I said “NO!”)

He must have to get himself swine drunk of a night before he can stand to plow your field.

(You said what?)


Another sexy/naughty tune, brought to me by “Brothers With No Game” courtesy of NvS! You love it…yes you do.



NvS-Between My Thighs……I’m feeling this track! Plus she kinda sound like Kelis a lil bit