but like neurotypicals need to get it through their heads that people with personality disorders can be abused much differently than them. Repeatedly and purposefully ignoring borderline people is abuse. Taking advantage of the trust of dependent people and leaving them on their own to "test them” is abuse. Little things they may not consider being abuse may actually BE abuse to those people. So like stop pretending that what we call abuse “isn’t legitimate” just because it’s not in your neurotypical standards of what is and isn’t abuse.