b:m

  • swedish commentator:as you may have noticed, ukraine is not competing this year. but here is russia singing about peace!

BREAKING NEWS: For years, marine biologists have been trying to determine why various species of whales breach (propel their bodies out of the water and into the air). However, a recent study performed on humpback whales has proven that this high flying stunt is actually whales’ way of saying “screw you” when they no longer want to deal with what is going on under the sea. Whether its pesky siblings, annoying crabs, or ogling octopi, if the whale is not having it, they’ll throw themselves into the air.

“oh, um, hey. this is a weird question– but what do cats look like?”

“cats? you’ve never seen a cat?”

“bro of course ive seen a cat it’s just….just refresh my memory, bro? how many legs again?”

“four legs. they’re furry. kind of like dogs but smaller?”

“like how big? like a loaf of bread?”

“yeah.”

“and dogs…”

“bro don’t tell me–”

“i’m messing with you bro, of course i know what a dog looks like! they’re the ones with tails right?” 

“yyyyeah. “

“ok. i’ve got this bro thanks”