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I’ve been messing with the idea of making various asexuality identity shirts for a while, since I’ve never actually SEEN one before, and can anyone let me know if that’s a thing they’d even be mildly interested in or is something like this a shirt you might possibly want to wear (something with cool fonts that look kinda like album covers and don’t automatically look like queer pride shirts to the uninitiated so you can wear it incognito if you want and it’ll look like a sick band shirt is basically what I’m feeling)??

hey reminder that “I wish I was aro ace it must be so much easier not having feelings :(” is a really shitty thing to say because not only does it uphold the “aro robot” stereotype it also implies that all feelings are inherently romantic and invalidates platonic feelings so if you could not say that that would be really great thanks

seriously though a lot of these kinds of posts are just taking those large-scale ideas people supposedly support and say “that’s nice and all but can you actually start applying them to us

they are not out to disprove the larger-scale concept in the first place

anonymous said:

how can i prevent people from hitting on me? i'm aro ace and pretty introverted and it makes me very uncomfortable when people do that, and i'm always nervous that people like me in that way, so i have to pretend to be oblivious and then avoid them.

My favorite method of keeping away unwanted attention, without discouraging people from still finding me approachable (since I work in customer service and have to be approachable), is a body scrub spell I wrote about seven months ago. 

Use one cup finely ground coffee beans (please note, this WILL make your tub look like a mud bath)

A splash of vanilla extract

And a quarter to a third cup of coconut oil. 

One of the uses of coconut is chastity, so it’s kind of a simple and subtle way of putting, “Not interested” in your spell. Vanilla is very persuasive for me, it encourages people to respect that wish of being left alone. Finally, coffee. Coffee is pure strength for me, it’s inner strength, it’s determination, and it’s making your polite request very firm. It’s all together my magical way of saying, “I’m not interested, so don’t even bother asking, because you’ll just make this awkward for both of us.” and for a more direct route, there’s this lovely spell I recently found by devoteeofpoppies

A Greeting

Hey, its Mod Leof, and welcome to the queerplatonicpartners blog! I saw a lot of people needing a “dating” site of sorts for queerplatonic partners/zucchinis/whatever you call them, so I decided to make this blog! The guidelines for posting a “profile” are on the submit page, and profiles will only be allowed as submits. No profile asks will be published.
However, question asked will be answered. I hope everyone can find what they want here!
— Mod Leof

anonymous said:

I'm ace/aro and pretty open about it. Almost everyone in my family knows and I never though it'd ever be a real problem until a few days ago when this man (a pastor/minister, I'm not even sure what he is, the only thing I know is that he's religious and has some sort of position in his church) came to my house invited by my parents and dared to say to my face that this whole asexuality thing was not a real thing. It was the devil misleading me. I felt so outraged. The worse part of it all is

+ that my father seemed to agree with him. I don’t believe him, of course, but I felt utterly bad and even offended. It sucks

You have every right to feel offended.
I don’t really know what you can do against it, other than trying to explain to your father what asexuality really is. but if he’s so against it, maybe he won’t listen, and then there’s nothing else you can do other than avoiding him so he doesn’t make you uncomfortable.
you should do, what ever is healthiest and best for you. in a power dynamic where you live under your parents roof and can’t go somewhere else there’s a limit on what you can do.

uxoriosis replied to your post:seriously though a lot of these kinds of posts are…

yeah ppl need to understand that these things are often ‘forgotten’ to be bad when it involves aro/ace ppl

I can’t count how many times I’ve seen people who constantly rail against the “victimized friendzone” idea turn around and say shit like “I feel so bad for anyone who falls in love with an aro person”

or people who will talk forever about consent issues suddenly whipping out a “asexual people who won’t have sex with their partners are ABUSING THEM!!”

but hey talking about either of these things would totally mean I’m saying only aro people get accused of frienzoning or that only ace people are pressured into unwanted sex, right??

anonymous said:

FEUILLY

Their first name: Personal Jesus
Their romantic/sexual orientation: Ace/Aro
Where they come from: Heaven
What do they study or what’s their job: He’s got lots of odd jobs to make ends meet but I like to think he’s an aspiring children’s book illustrator!!
Their family: Dead
Their hobby: for some reason Feuilly being able to play the accordion comes to mind I—
The running joke about them among les Amis: the one time enjolras was drunk and proclaimed “I’m going to show my best friend feuilly to everyone in Paris wearing a salmon suit” which isn’t really even at feuilly’s expense never joke at feuilly’s expense
A random fact about them: evidently he can play the accordion
Bonus : Any fancast ? Z A Y N  M A L I K

anonymous said:

The fist time I learned about aromanticism I felt free, I felt like I finally could describe myself and I felt understood, but now I'm feeling hurt all over for being excluded of something so deified. How do I deal with it? How I make this feeling of being forever left out stop?

there is a lot of self hatred in people who are aro and ace spectrum. this just comes from growing up in a society where romantic and sexual orientations are valued as if they are what gives your life meaning. this is called amanormativity and it’s bullshit. there are many allo people who realize later in life that what they did with their time and who they did it with mattered way more to their human experience than those people they dated or slept with.

it can be really hard to get rid of internalized amanormativity, but I will assure you that you are a full and fulfilled person no mater what your place is on the aromantic spectrum.

for me the biggest thing was to be a part of the aromantic community on tumblr. it’s small enough that I’ve found it incredibly inviting and wonderful. you can follow aromanticism blogs or aro people’s personal blogs and go through the tags and join discussions and find a whole community of people who are like you and don’t need to be different.

-mod meg

anonymous said:

Any over queer headcanons?

  • chef - gay
  • chris - bi
  • dj - biro/ace
  • eva - gay
  • izzy - pan
  • lightning - aro/ace
  • noah - gay
  • owen - bi
  • topher - gay (only attracted to chris rn due to extreme obsessiveness) 
  • tyler - (very closeted) bi

thats all folks

anonymous said:

I'm not ace aro, but is it ok to make an asexual oc?

it definitely is! MORE ASEXUAL REPRESENTATION IS ALWAYS AMAZING!!

anonymous said:

My roommate thinks she might be asexual or aromantic and since I'm aro/ace she's been coming to me for advice a lot. I always try to talk to her, but sometimes she gets really into the conversation and it brings back a lot of the confusion I was facing just last year. The other night we talked about it a lot and I actually ended up crying myself to sleep. I feel bad because I want to help her but I guess it's triggering? I don't know anymore.

You are not obligated to help her, though it’s very nice that you want to. Tell her honestly that this kind of talk is not leaving you in a good place emotionally, but you want to help her - then give her a link to this blog and to other websites you’ve found helpful! 

Take care of yourself. You can also come at it from the angle of “Y’know, I’m still a little new to this, but these people have a lot of great advice. They really helped me, so they can probably help you!” (I’m assuming you like us?) 

-Kiowa

*SLAMS FISTS ON THE TABLE* MORE ASEXUAL AND AROMANTIC REPRESENTATION

*KICKS DOWN A DOOR* NO MORE COMPARING ASEXUALS AND/OR AROMANTICS TO FUCKING ROBOTS AND PLANTS

*PUNCHES A HOLE IN THE WALL* ARO/ACE PEOPLE ARE HUMAN BEINGS WITH FEELINGS AND DESERVE TO BE TREATED WITH SOME GODDAMN RESPECT

*CLIMBS ON TOP OF THE ROOF AND BEATS CHEST* ARO/ACE PEOPLE FUCKING EXIST

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