I made a new page for avpd information since there has been a lot of talk about having an avpd specific blog (and I know of two that have been created out of that). My blog isn’t like a “public resource” like people are talking about, but I plan to have the information that one would have and I blog mainly about avpd/mental illness on here. So, I’m like a personal blog with public resources. Anyway… It’s not done but it’s a start. Avpd has so little (free) information about it and a lot of that is recycled. This took 4ever. Let me know if anything doesn’t work/linked wrong/the articles are down right problematic. I still plan to get more AVPD vs SAD, and AVPD vs Aspergers, and AVPD with DPD, and self help info. It’s a work in progress. I’m rambling, it’s 3am- going to bed.

The Real Problem of Evil is Thinking Evil's a Real Problem

The idea that people can be completely evil and have no redeeming qualities, extenuating circumstances, or core humanity at all … That is the only place where true evil lies. The belief that some people are “evil” makes it easier for us to write them off, dehumanize them, destroy them, cease helping them. The idea of evil makes misbegotten moral righteousness possible, and justifies all manner of aggressive and hateful acts.

Sociopathy and antisocial personality disorder are just a repackaging of the age-old concept of pure unredeemable evil. It’s morality-driven dehumanization dressed in a clinical psychologist’s coat.

It is comforting to believe that people commit heinous acts because they are henious monsterous people. Such thinking protects us from wondering if we are capable of committing evil acts, if we are hateful and destructive. It also implies that ending suffering in the world is not a matter of slowly and constant reforming all our hearts and minds; it’s simply a matter of finding all the bad eggs and scrambling them.

The concept of sociopathic evil absolves us from doing the hard work of reforming criminals, remedying the precursors to crime, and examining the morality of our own actions. It is much easier to cast off the malicious as evil, disordered, defective, inhuman, exceptional, than it is to turn such a critical gaze upon ourselves.

By accepting the idea that “some people are just evil”, we resign ourselves to an overly simplified worldview where wrongs cannot be prevented, only punished, and where there is no broader societal responsibility for the sins of society’s children.


Albuquerque Police Department Substations Vandalized Overnight

Four Albuquerque Police Department substations across the city were vandalized with red paint Monday night.

The substations at Central and Rio Grande by Old Town, Central and Girard near the University of New Mexico, Montgomery and Tramway in the foothills and one on South Broadway were all painted overnight, according to an APD news release.

The defacement is most likely in retaliation to the recent shooting of James Boyd, a homeless man who was fatally shot after a three hour-long confrontation with police over illegal camping.

Residents have held several protests against police violence by Albuquerque police since the shooting last month.

In a highly scathing assessment, the Justice Department said Thursday that the Albuquerque Police Department, whose officers have shot a and killed 23 people in the past four years, had engaged in a “pattern or practice of use of excessive force,” often acting recklessly and violating people’s constitutional rights.

avoidant personality disorder

avoidant personality disorder (or anxious personality disorder) is a personality disorder recognised in the diagnostic and statistical manual of mental disorders handbook in a person characterised by a pervasive pattern of social inhibition, feelings of inadequacy, extreme sensitivity to negative evaluation, and avoidance of social interaction. people with avoidant personality disorder often consider themselves to be socially inept or personally unappealing and avoid social interaction for fear of being ridiculed, humiliated, rejected, or disliked. avoidant personality disorder is usually first noticed in early adulthood. childhood emotional neglect and peer group rejection (e.g. bullying) are both associated with an increased risk for the development of avoidant personality disorder.

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Militarized Police Clash With Anti-Brutality Protesters

Demonstrations over a recent police shooting turned into what the mayor of Albuquerque called “mayhem" on Sunday, as protesters there clashed with police during a 10-hour long rally.

Hundreds of protesters took to the streets and freeways of New Mexico’s largest city in response to the death earlier this month of James Boyd, a homeless man who was fatally shot after a three hour-long confrontation with police over illegal camping.

Protesters repeatedly marched from downtown Albuquerque to the University of New Mexico campus, around two miles away, blocking traffic and shouting anti-police slogans. As tensions escalated, officers responded with tear gas.

The videos below show protesters, carrying signs that read “End The Police State” and “Who’s Next?” confronting police in riot gear. Other footage shows demonstrators marching, including some wearing Anonymous masks and walking up to officers.

The shocking video of Boyd’s shooting (Graphic), which was captured by an officer’s helmet-mounted camera and released by police, went viral and drew stern condemnation.

After shooting a tear gas canister at Boyd and releasing an attack dog, police shot the man as he had his back turned.

The US Justice Department has been investigating the Albuquerque police department for more than a year, after several allegations of civil rights violations and abuse of force, which New Mexico residents say have gotten progressively worse. The FBI also opened an investigation into Boyd’s death.

Watch: Police Shoot Tear Gas At Protesters

Receptive language problems vs. auditory processing problems.

I see people confuse these things all the time, so this is just an attempt to differentiate them.  Because I have them both.  And they’re worlds apart, completely different, even though sometimes they have similar results ona superficial level.

Auditory Processing Disorders

So a lot of people know about CAPD, Central Auditory Processing Disorder, and a lot of autistic people are diagnosed with it, or could be diagnosed with it.  CAPD basically means that whether or not you have any actual hearing problem, your brain has trouble making sense out of what you hear.  It often results in problems like:

  • Trouble differentiating between different sounds in words.  Like th vs f, ch vs sh, things like that.  Similar-sounding words get confused with each other.  Some people can barely differentiate between any consonants at all while other people only have trouble differentiating between very similar consonants in very similar contexts.
  • Trouble picking out one voice out of many voices.  So if two people are talking, you can have trouble focusing in on one of them, or you can get the conversations confused and mixed up.  Or it just sounds like a jumble.
  • Words may just sound like a jumble of sounds that you can’t make out anything about at all.  
  • Trouble hearing words against background noise.
  • Trouble remembering auditory information.
  • Trouble paying attention to auditory information.
  • Auditory distortions, both word and non-word.
  • Tendency to overload quickly when dealing with auditory information.

And that’s just a short list of problems, there’s a lot more.  But basically the thing about auditory processing disorders is that they are not language disorders.  They affect your ability to understand language through auditory channels.  If they’re severe enough, they can prevent learning language for the same reason that a hearing loss can prevent learning language.  But they are not, themselves, language problems.  They’re hearing problems, they’re just brain-based hearing problems instead of ear-based hearing problems.

Receptive language problems

Receptive language problems mean trouble comprehending language.  This means language in all of its forms: spoken, written, or sign language, although depending on the person, some of those may be easier or harder than others for various reasons.  But basically, a receptive language problem isn’t based in hearing, it’s based in the words themselves.  

The best way I can contrast an auditory processing disorder with a receptive language disorder is by extremes:

1.  You hear all the sounds in the words perfectly, you have no trouble differentiating any of the consonants, you have no trouble with any aspect of actually hearing the words. If you wanted, you could repeat back the words verbatim with no trouble.  And yet you can get no meaning out of the words at all.

2.  You understand that words are supposed to have meaning, you can think the words just fine, things like that.  But when you actually hear the words, they sound jumbled, garbled, muttered, mumbled, or like gibberish, or you have trouble differentiating some of the words from others, or things like that.  But you know they’re words and you can get meaning out of them if you could only hear them properly.

The first is a receptive language problem.

The second is an auditory processing problem.

When I was growing up, I had severe receptive language problems and much milder auditory processing problems (and severe visual processing problems).  They interact with each other in various ways, but they are not the same thing.  

Having a receptive language problem means that you have trouble understanding all language.  Sometimes it even means that you don’t know language exists, or could exist.  Words are just sounds – sounds that you may be able to make out perfectly well, but they don’t have meaning.  And that’s the difference:  Whether the problem is the sound, or whether the problem is that you can’t get meaning out of words.  A receptive language problem is a problem of meaning, not a problem of sensory processing.

Severe enough sensory processing issues can lead to receptive language problems, though.  Because if you can’t process sound well enough to hear words, you’re not going to hear the words, and you’re not going to develop the ability to understand words unless you find some alternate way to get words into your brain.  But there’s still a difference – receptive language problems that arise on their own, are a core cognitive issue, not a hearing or visual issue.

Receptive language problems can do very strange things to cognitive and language development.  Some people with receptive language problems can become accomplished mimics who can parrot back what we know other people expect to hear, and mask those problems altogether.  (This is apparently a known thing that even happens to people who lose receptive language during brain injuries and the like:  It can sometimes take really specific testing to keep them from fooling you into believing they understand every word you’re saying.)  Other people with receptive language problems aren’t able to compensate in that way.

Receptive language problems often change in intensity over time, or even over the course of a day, so at some times a person may understand language relatively well, and at another time they may not be able to understand it at all.

My situation at this point in my life is that I can understand language, but it’s always a struggle to do it.  It’s like every time I have to understand language, I’m climbing a cliff.  And every time I have to pay attention to something else I let go and fall back down to the ground, where language doesn’t exist.  And then if I want to understand language I have to climb the cliff again.

Sometimes I’m not able to make the climb, or to make the climb as high as other people.

My receptive language problems also shaped the entire form of my expressive language to the point that speech is unusable and writing is usable but difficult, and that’s a whole nother story in itself.

But basically I hear people throwing around the words ‘receptive language problems’ and 'auditory processing problems’ interchangeably.  And most of the time it seems like they’re actually talking about auditory processing problems.  I’ve found that among autistic people online, auditory processing problems seem much more common than serious receptive language problems.  This is probably because only some people with serious receptive language problems manage to outgrow or overcome them enough to communicate easily online.  Whereas lots and lots of people with auditory processing problems learn language and have fewer problems with communicating online.  So in online groups of people, CAPD is going to be more heavily represented than severe receptive language problems.  

But lots of people have both, and people can have mild receptive language problems as well.  And for many autistic people, receptive language becomes iffy under stress, even if the rest of the time it seems fine.  Sort of like expressive language can go away under stress even in people with no significant delays in expressive language early in life.

Anyway, I hope I’ve made it easier to differentiate between the two.  And I hope I haven’t just added to the confusion.  My brain is kind of iffy at the moment, because I’m sleepy.

Watch on anarcho-queer.tumblr.com

Protesters Attack Atlanta Police After Officers Beat Civilians And Pepper Spray Children

Today, April 9th 2013, there was a riot in Edgewood, a neighborhood northeast of downtown Atlanta. The area is almost entirely residential and is about a year behind in the ongoing gentrification of Atlanta.

Around fifty people gathered for a “March Against the Police” with drums, banners, and a desire for vengeance at the playground in Edgewood Courts, an apartment complex in the back of the neighborhood. Edgewood Courts contains some of the few remaining low income housing units in Atlanta. Yesterday, the police pepper sprayed a group of kids and beat and arrested a man grieving over his lost father.

The march started off slowly — a few people started chanting All cops are bastards / Fuck the police! as drumming began. As the crowd left the complex, some people lined the streets, looking on. People walked up behind the complex toward the front of the neighborhood. As the first cop car approached, more and more people joined in. At first, the crowd seemed apprehensive about what to do, but all of a sudden something clicked. Contrary to most situations, the presence of the police did not act as a deterrent. Instead, the crowd became more excited and angry as the cops approached. A bottle was thrown at a police car and the momentum and joy picked up. What ensued was something that we will never forget. People began kicking the cop car and chased it away when it began to retreat. One pig gone. Cheers and chants filled the air as the crowd, feeling emboldened, decided to keep going.

The riot proceeded away from the Courts and the police started to put more distance between themselves and the crowd. The intensity grew as numbers swelled, fluctuating between 75 and 100+. The crowd blocked off the main entrance to the Courts, refusing to let the police drive down. What happened next could not have been anticipated.

A cop car was stopped at one of the central intersections in Edgewood. People quickly approached the squad car, even going so far as to lean in the window to shout at the cops while others banged on the side of the car. More and more people drew closer, eventually circling the car. Once it was successfully blocked and the pigs inside were intimidated, they tried to leave. The crowd joyfully sent them off with rocks, sticks, and even basketballs to speed the process. People cried out in excitement, leaping into the air for high-fives and hugs. Throughout the event not a single person made a plea for the police. It was clear the police were our common enemy.

On the way back to the apartment complex, people noticed an unmarked car coming toward the crowd up a sidestreet. People immediately responded by running toward the car and letting loose a rainstorm of pebbles, and then rocks, and then bricks. The cops threw their car into reverse and exited the area as fast as they could. Laughing, the crowd ran back down to the Courts and broke apart. A number of cop cars began circling throughout the apartments but left after people continued to throw projectiles, including a hammer, at the cops. Some kids, who had to be under 10, were even letting stones fly at cops.

All in all the police were forced to retreat 4 times — leaving the neighborhood completely. The crowd of people never backed down. An arrest occurred just outside of the neighborhood after the event; it is unclear if it is related. (Note: According to MSM, a person with cop watch Atlanta was arrested)

There’s a war on between the Edgewood residents and the cops, and the conflict is only escalating. Anger and riotous joy is the response to frequent harrassment. The day before this event the police attempted to manage a crowd of people outside the apartment complex and were met with rowdy resistance. Three people were arrested, but not one went down easy. The cops have been upping their patrols around Edgewood recently, but tonight, there aren’t any squad cars on the street.

MSM Coverage:

“Neighbors throw bricks, hammers at police cars over alleged brutality,” WSB-TV Channel 2 Atlanta

“APD police crusiers pummeled with bricks during protest,” 11 Alive Atlanta

“Two Atlanta police cruisers hit by bricks, rocks,” CBS Atlanta 

“Protesters throw items at police cars in NE Atlanta,” The Atlanta Journal-Constitution


“Cop Threatens Kids With Shotgun,” CopWatch footage from March 19th shot at the Edgewood Courts Apartment, Edgewood, Atlanta, GA

A person with avoidant personality disorder may:
  • Be easily hurt when people criticize or disapprove of them

  • Hold back too much in intimate relationships

  • Be reluctant to become involved with people

  • Avoid activities or jobs that involve contact with others

  • Be shy in social situations out of fear of doing something wrong

  • Make potential difficulties seem worse than they are

  • Hold the view they are not good socially, not as good as other people, or unappealing

Albuquerque Police Department Buildings Smeared with Red Paint, Symbolizing Blood on Their Hands

“This is political expression. If you had a fancy art degree, like I do, you would realize that the red paint has symbolic significance. If you fought an insurgency in Iraq, like I have, you would know about asymmetrical warfare.

"The public that is aghast at the shooting of James Boyd recognizes that their voices are muted. They get two minutes of commentary at a City Council meeting. Some of the councilors listen. Some play on their phones. Some worry about what’s for dinner. Who has apologized to the public for not only the shooting but the release of a horrifying video thought to exonerate the shooting? Yes, the video was released by the police because when the Chief of Police saw that video he thought, "That’s a justifiable slaying and once I show this to the public they will stop scrutinizing this shooting.” Yet the rest of us, anyone with a stomach, want to vomit all over ourselves at what is revealed in that video.

“That is how out of touch APD is with the reality on the ground. And our civilian leadership, just like in Iraq, don’t have the moral backbone to ask the hard questions and make the hard choices. So. The public knows that their voices are muted. They know that their methods of expression must be asymmetrical in order to have any chance of being heard.

"I understood why Iraqi insurgents fighting a foreign occupation resorted to "illegitimate” tactics. They could not afford to go toe to toe with us. We had kevlar and unlimited rounds and years of training. They had an old Nissan and ammunition dating back to the Iran-Iraq War.

“I understand why red paint is plastered in broad angry strokes dripping down the sides of APD buildings. Blood is on our hands. You worry about taxpayer cost of political graffiti to a couple buildings? You are missing the picture, my friends. Look a little closer. There are corpses shuttered in that building that want out.”

— unnamed author

Via Revolution-News