How silly to compare her
to hurricanes
to thunderstorms
to temporary
cliche swirls of emotion.
She is concrete. She is permanent.

She is brave with her words
and slick with her heart.
There is concentration dripping from her pores
and love sticking to her bones.

She is a lifetime of goodmornings.
She is the warmth of lilac sheets.
She is firmly planted.
She sticks in your mouth
and slams against your jaw.

She is everything

and you’re telling me
the best you can come up with
is a fucking 30 minute storm?

—  Michelle K., She is Not a Hurricane.
strength is allowing yourself to need another being. strength is the act of love at the least deserving instant for the least deserving person. strength is the composure kept as those you care for seem to do everything in their power to hurt you. strength is then finding the will to let go. strength is sticking to your decision at your most vulnerable times. strength is trust, trusting someone new. & strength is in fact starting this cycle again, knowing that in being strong you may feel to be at your very weakest.
—  briannefoolsurvivor of a broken heart
tru life astrology: a leo’s opinion on the signs

aries: how many different languages is it possible to say “yes bitch fuck me up” in

taurus: so yawn but so yay at the same time 

gemini: sex me up but like only if u wanna

cancer: too much wah not enough YAH

leo: finally someone who can relate to my greatness where u been

virgo: it’s just a 50/50 with you guys i either love you or i wanna take the stick out of your ass and make you go fetch it

libra: highkey would make out with you any day of the week

scorpio: 10/10 y’all are my inspiration

sagittarius: my fuckin BABY you’re the tru mvp

capricorn: i only hate you bc you’re better at most things than me

aquarius: i STRIVE for your acceptance why don’t y’all just love me already

pisces: you guys are so cute and fluffy but also fuckin annoying pick one or the other i don’t have enough time for these mixed emotions

Triple the Fun // Cake Threesome

(A/N) uGH wow this took forever im sorry

Writer: Mary

Words: 2.3k+

Rating: R

Summary: Calum and Luke just really want to prove how good they can make (Y/N) feel. 


Calum shook his head, confusion bright in his brown eyes, “You,” he paused, sticking his pointer finger in your face, “are lying.”

You rolled your eyes, pushing his hand away from your face, “No I’m not, me and Michael had sex. It was a while ago, though, and we were drunk.”

Calum shook his head disbelievingly. He was sat next to you on the couch, an arm tossed lazily across the back cushion. You had never planned to tell them about you and Michael, but the topic of whether or not you would fuck someone in the band arose, and so did the details about that night.

“But, but why Michael?” Luke sputtered, scrunching his eyes at you from across the room. He was hunched over, elbows resting on his knees as a dramatic shiver ran down his spine.

You shrugged, picking at your nails shyly, “Why not? He’s cute.”

Calum scoffed, looking at you with wide eyes, gesturing wildly to his face, “Why not? Because you could have asked me!”

“Or me,” Luke piped up, “I’m better in bed, I bet.”

Your gaze remained on your hands as you sighed loudly, “I don’t know, he was pretty good, best I ever had.”

“That’s because you haven’t had me,” Calum stated, as if it were the most obvious thing in the world. He stood up quickly, beginning to undo his belt, “Okay, take your shorts off, we’re settling this.”

You leaned forward, wrapping his fingers in your grip in an attempt to stop his efforts.

“I am not having sex with you.” You scoffed, leaning back against the couch, “Why do you care so much anyway?”

“Because,” Luke started, voice deep and gravely as he stood and made his way to the couch. He sat on the cushion next to you, placing a hand on your thigh, “Do you know how long we’ve wanted to make you feel good, (Y/N)?”

You swallowed thickly, shaking your head slowly as Luke’s fingers rubbed your thigh, reaching higher with each stroke. His eyes were a dark blue, gaze unwavering as he stared into yours.

Calum kneeled in front of you, gripping your chin and forcing you to look at him, “Do you know how long we’ve wanted to make you feel good?”

You shook your head again, closing your eyes as Calum’s fingers left your chin and brushed against your cheekbone. He leaned forward, placing a chaste kiss against your jaw, “So fucking long.”  

Keep reading

anonymous asked:

I got my toe stuck in my vagina and I think it has something to do with the retrogatorade? Do you know I can avoid this? Next time??

maybe you shouldn’t stick your toe in your vagina next time mercury is in retrograde

Kamala: I just want to smell it.
Bruno: I’m gonna start charging you for smells.
Kamala: Delicious, delicious infidel meat…
Nakia: Seriously, Kamala, I don’t understand why you do this to yourself.

Jersey City. 12 Miles from Manhattan

Bruno: Either eat the bacon or stick to your principles. Chow or chow not, there is no smell.
Kamala: Thanks, Yoda.
Nakia: There’s fakon. I’ve had it. It’s not that terrible.
Kamala: Wow, Kiki, that makes me want to run right out and buy a lifetime supply.
Nakia: I told you not to call me Kiki anymore.
Kamala: Sorry, Nakia. Proud Turkish Nakia doesn’t need “Amreeki” nickname. I get it.
Bruno: Yo. Here comes the concern troll.

– From Ms. Marvel v3 #1 written by G. Wiliow Wilson, art by Adrian Alphona, colored by Ian Herring

1xxdrifterzxx1 asked:

Would you rather stick a rubber banded Xbox controller in your pants on live TV, or be on the receiving end of a 30 person bukakke? Shit is getting creative. ;)

I don’t know what a rubber banded Xbox controller is…

lacking-luster asked:

Saw your post and everyone wondering what your magical face stick was. Just thought I'd do a PSA so everyone can see: They are called comedone extractors (comedone is a clogged pore aka blackhead). They are great especially if you have sensitive skin because they won't leave indents or marks on your skin - other than the initial redness which subsided very quickly. Target or Walmart type stores have them but Dollar Tree in the US carries the exact same one for only $1 :)


Smartphone Selfie Stick

Take your selfie game to professional levels by using the smartphone selfie stick. This accessory fits most smartphones and can extend to different lengths and features an adjustable ball head so you can customize the angle for the perfect narcissistic shot.


Check It Out

Awesome Sh*t You Can Buy


There was a break in the crappy weather, the sun came out, and it was the perfect night to sit out on the patio with good food, good people and the great city where I was born as our backdrop. Last night was glorious. And then it started raining…. Again.

A photo from the race on Saturday. I always wear sunglasses and after seeing my race pictures… I’ll wear them from now on. #crazyeyes

Today, 50 miles on the bike…in the effing rain. Seriously. I wore my USMC jersey to remember my dad today. He was such a proud Marine. He always had a way of referencing his Marine Corps days growing up.

Me-“Daddy, I’m thirsty”
Him-“you aren’t thirsty. Thirsty is when you have to put a rock in your mouth to keep your tongue from sticking to the roof of your mouth”
What do you say to that??? “Ok”

The bike ride was challenging. If I’ve learned anything in my years in running and tri’s, it’s this… When they name a hill, it’s never a good thing. My first attempt at “The Wall”. The Wall won. I got up about ¾ of the way and I’m
Standing on my pedals going nowhere. Then ever so gracefully I just tip over. I manage to get one side unclipped, but not the other. My first fall, and not even a scrape to show. Graceful, very graceful Marie. I had my first bike malfunction too. I’m flying down a hill at about 30 mph when my pedals just locked up. I managed to stop the bike and we had to call the other cyclists back. I don’t speak bike…Yet. But apparently I over shifted and need to take my bike to get adjusted.

It was a great long weekend. Back at work tomorrow.

First Blurb 2/4



You would be up humming and cooking breakfast when you would feel his arms wrap around you.His bare chest pressed up to your tee shirt clad back.
“Morning love.” The words you whispered to him every morning.
“Mmmmm.” Would be his response as be jokingly nipped at your shoulder.
You couldn’t help but laugh as you turned around to see your Aussie fiancé’s blond hair sticking up all over the place.
“Oi I’ll give you something to giggle about!” He yelled and attacked your neck with little love spots which you found out about later that day when the boys came over for lunch. You couldn’t help but return the favor that night.


“Morning baby.” You opened your baby blues to see you hunky boyfriend resting next to you on the couch. “Have a nice nap?” He asked. “Yeah I needed it with what you left me to cover this morning!” You exclaimed as you pulled off your scarf and unbuttoned your blouse to reveal the red love bites in a heart on your boob. His eyes widened with shock and he couldn’t help but laugh as he pulled you onto his lap. “I’m sorry baby but I couldn’t resist showing you my love.” He mumbled into your neck as he stood up walking to you bedroom. His biceps flexing under you.
“It’s fine I’m not mad.” You said because you couldn’t even attempt to stay mad at your hunk.
“I love you baby.” He said lying down with you on top of him his hands resting on your bum.
“Love you to hot stuff.” You mumble drifting to sleep


Never have I ever posted a Broadway cover! Bored tonight–requests for any other songs, stick em in the inbox! AND I want to see some of YOUR covers too!