Oliver is aware of his attraction to her, though he’s hesitant to call it love for a number of reasons. What he feels is too big and immediate to get wrapped up in such a small, treacherous word, overshadowed by what he does and what Felicity believes he can do. Love should be simple and clean, Oliver thinks. He hasn’t felt anything like that in a long time.

[He] wonders when and how she learned to read him; wonders if she can sense, within him, a capacity for gentleness. (x)


that ship meme ⇒ nine favorite moments [1/9]

JAL: And was it ever?
CHRIS: No. I’m gonna get sacked, Jal. The boss knows I’m a fuck-up.
JAL: Do you remember what you wanted the house to look like when you came out the duvet? Maybe you can sell that. You’re not a fuck-up, Chris.

anonymous asked:

The last scene where Sam says Dean is in trouble, am i the only one who didn't get that line? I mean how did he realise that? Did he overheard what Cain told Dean? Cause Sam have believed in Dean so far, what made him think that Dean is in trouble?

He was trying to say how Dean did well, he is feeling victorious, Dean saved the day and stayed himself, he handed the blade over. 

and he said 

Now look at Dean, and look at his eyes, and look at that from the eyes of the person who knows him better than anyone: 

This smile isn’t genuine. it isn’t a smile of victory or success. this smile is only trying to reassure his little brother. 

But he can’t play this all along: 

and he looks at Sam, and there is pain, and he is worried so much, and he doesn’t believe in it really, even though he try. hetried but then he said ‘maybe’ because Cain’s words are still in his mind. 

And now look at Sam’s body language: 

He is leaning back, absorbing, realizing Dean is not okay. at all. knowing the hope he has isn’t something Dean shares, knowing the victory he feels by defeating Cain, isn’t a victory Dean shares. 

Knowing Dean isn’t alright. 

Next thing Dean is asking for ‘rest for four days’ . 

Sam knows how to read everything about Dean. He can’t be fooled. 


allaboutthathartwin asked:

Can we just talk about the part where Dean's tallest thug threatens Harry in the bar and Eggsy urges him to go with tHE SOFTEST VOICE. EVEN THOUGH HE MET HARRY AN HOUR OR SO AGO HE'S SO CONCERNED THAT HE MAY BE HURT BY JUST ASSOCIATING WITH HIM. EGGSY IS THE BIGGEST SWEETHEART

Eggsy is good kid, he has been shit on and pushed around and had no one who believed in him or did right by him and he still chooses to be a decent human being. 

Honestly Eggsy should of turned out to be a roughed up hot headed loser with an attitude problem and a thirst for violence, but he didn’t. Whatever bad choices he made, the petty crimes, the drugs etc where not the worst he could of done, he even tried to straighten himself out before Harry even came into his life. He tried to become a Marine. The only thing that brought him back was his love for his mother, even though she guilted him into coming back he doesn’t hate her for it, he did it because he values her happiness above his own. 

Dean tried to ruin Eggsy, he tried to break that boys soul and take away any light and goodness he had in him, but Eggsy for all his faults and bad choices still resisted. He is only human so of course he failed sometimes, but he got back up and even with all the abuse he suffered he still held onto that goodness inside of him. He accepted that he needed to act and be a certain way to survive, but when it came down to it, when it mattered he picked people. He picked his mother career, he picked to let Harry walk away, tried to save him instead of using him as a distracting to escape and he chose to saved a dog over the promise of money and adventure. When the only person who ever believed in him and gave him an out, gave him a purpose for his life DIED EGGSY GARY FUCKING UNWIN PICKED PEOPLE.


10 reasons why Kurt Cobain wasn't murdered

1. None of Kurt’s bandmates, family, or friends believe that he was murdered.

2. Two of Kurt’s uncles committed suicide by self-inflicted gunshots to the head.

3. Kurt made a Super-8 film as a child depicting him killing himself.

4. Kurt reportedly told a classmate that he was going to become a famous rock star and then kill himself in a blaze of glory like Jimi Hendrix (believing Hendrix’ death was a suicide).

5. Kurt wrote in his published ‘Journal’ that he once tried to commit suicide by laying on train tracks only to have the train come down the wrong tracks.

6. Kurt Cobain’s lyrics were full of direct and veiled references to suicide:

Song: “I Hate Myself and Want To Die” – the name of a Nirvana song, the original title for the album “In Utero”, and Kurt shocked his bandmates by showing up to a show wearing a custom made T-Shirt with this phrase on it.

Song: “Milk It”
“Look on the bright side, suicide.”

Song: “Scentless Apprentice”
“I lie in the soil and fertilize mushrooms.
Leaking out gas fumes are made into perfume.
You can’t fire me because I quit!
Throw me in the fire and I won’t throw a fit.”

Song: “You Know You’re Right”
Lyrics (the song is loaded with a veiled suicide references):
“I would never bother you.
Never speak a word again.
I will crawl away for good…
Always knew it would come to this…
You Know You’re Right.”

7. Nirvana MTV Unplugged, Nov. 18, 1993. To me this was Kurt’s planned epitaph 5 months before his death:

Cobain suggested that the stage be decorated with stargazer lilies, black candles, and a crystal chandelier. Cobain’s request prompted the show’s producer to ask him, “You mean like a funeral?”, to which the singer replied, “Exactly. Like a funeral.”
-Charles R. Cross’ book “Heavier Than Heaven”, pg. 304.

5 of the 6 songs cover songs during Nirvana’s MTV ‘Unplugged’ performance mentioned death.

Some Common Kurt Cobain Murder Arguments & Rebuttals:

8. “If Kurt had taken a lethal heroin overdose he would not be able to pull the trigger.”

Heroin addicts have increasingly high drug tolerances. Even a lethal dose of heroin would not necessarily have instantly killed Kurt Cobain.

“A typical lethal injection death should be completed within 7 minutes. Often that time is exceeded, sometimes by 1 or 2 hours.”

That is with a lethal chemical cocktail designed to kill a person and stop their heart. If Kurt gave himself a “lethal heroin overdose” it would have still been possible for him to shoot himself before the drugs kicked in.

9. “There was hardly any blood. If Kurt blew his head off there would have been more blood.”

Kurt shot himself using a bird-shot shotgun round, remember George W. Bush’s VP Dick Cheney shooting incident with his hunting buddy? That involved a bird-shot. If fired into a person’s head through their mouth a bird-shot round would probably kill them but not necessarily penetrate through the back of their skull. This would explain why there was so little blood found at the scene and why the security installation technician who discovered Kurt said he looked like he was sleeping.

10. “Courtney Love hired someone to murder Kurt Cobain because they were going to get a divorce.”

Just hours after performing on Saturday Night Live on January 11, 1992, one week before ‘Nevermind’ hit number one on the charts, Kurt overdosed on drugs. Courtney Love found him at 7:00 am the next morning lying on the floor. She revived him by splashing water on his face and punching him in the stomach.

In July 1993, Kurt was scheduled to perform at the New Music Seminar in New York City. Prior to the show, Kurt shot up too much heroin which resulted in an accidental overdose. Courtney Love injected him with Narcan and then punched him in the chest. This resuscitated Kurt who went on to perform later that night as if nothing had happened.

Courtney reportedly saved Kurt’s life after overdosing on heroin on numerous other occasions. If Courtney had not saved Kurt’s back in 1992 Nirvana would be known for a singer who died from a heroin overdose just before their only hit album hit #1. Because of Courtney Kurt lived for 2 more productive years.

Two months before Cobain killed himself he attempted suicide in Rome, Italy overdosing on “Roofies” and champagne and allegedly wrote a suicide note. Courtney discovered him overdosed, rushed him to the hospital, and saved his life again.

If Courtney wanted Kurt dead she could have just let him overdose and die numerous times. I don’t believe Courtney was a stabilizing influence on Kurt’s life but I also don’t believe that she had any reason or need to have him killed. Even if they divorced she would still be set for life financially. Why would she suddenly want to murder him 2 months after saving his life?

Some people need to believe conspiracy theories about Kurt. The 1998 film “Kurt and Courtney” gave rise to many of these “Kurt was murdered” theories. But even the filmmaker Nick Bloomfield does not believe that Kurt was murdered. Kurt’s best friend, Dylan Carlson, who bought him the shotgun said, “If I really thought Courtney was involved, She would be dead now, I’d kill her…” If Kurt’s friends, family, and bandmates don’t believe he was murdered why do some of Kurt’s fans have to believe it like their lives depend on it?

Kurt Cobain and Nirvana changed the course of rock music for the better. I was, and still am, a huge Nirvana fan. Kurt is the only musician whose death has ever made me cry. I have read 4 books about him. I will always love Nirvana’s music, but I do find it hard to listen to Nirvana without being reminded of his tragic death. Anyone who uses heroin is basically flirting with death. Kurt called himself a “death rocker” in his suicide note. I think Kurt always had a death wish and it eventually just caught up with him. “Always knew it would come to this… Pain… You know you’re right.” It’s all right there in his last song. RIP Kurt Cobain. May your music live on forever.


dick’s escrima stick

jason’s helmet

…and none for tim bye

Exo's reaction when they make their gf cry

XIUMIN: *the moment you run away from him*
"i fucked this up big time, didn’t i?"

LUHAN: “good job luhan… good job”

KRIS: *can’t believe how much of an idiot he is*

SUHO: *junmyun who is always calm and collected would even shock himself when he yelled at you, he would be afraid that after this you wouldn’t want to be near him*

LAY: *he would feel a pang in his chest, as if something just broke*

BAEKHYUN: “byun baekhyun you fucking idiot”

CHEN: *looks at you walk away from him unable to do anything*

CHANYEOL: “i… did that…? i made the one person i never wanted to hurt cry”

D.O: “i’m always complaining about those idiots, but i’m even worse”

TAO: “i’m sorry, i’m so sorry! don’t leave! i didn’t want to make you cry baobei!”

KAI: *when you try to get away, he grabs you from behind bringing you closer to him. he wouldn’t dare to say anything until you’ve stoped crying*

SEHUN: “why don’t you just leave me alone????!!!”
you-“why don’t i just leave you for good?!”

"hate" doesnt have a critical basis; ie, "bob bryar is stupid and ugly i hate him i cant believe he would tweet those things he deserves it"

"criticism" has a foundation and is a point that can be argued; ie, "bob bryar has made a lot of mistakes. his behaviour is sketchy, it resembles emotional manipulation (he brings up pitiable things about himself when the fandom loses interest in his rudeness, like after harassing mikey, he brings up that he misses drums, so well all love him again and he can be rude some more), and he appears to be using mental illness as a reasonable justification for his poor actions (like "family breakfast" on mikeys 1 year clean)"

very few (i havent actually seen any) people are “hating” on bob bryar; pls dont get these two things mixed up

anonymous asked:

And they should have been nicer. God, I feel like I shouldn't like it as much as I do,but the end kinda made me feel like bursting into evil cackles. DIpper...I can see it, actually. And then when I was reading, I could believe that was the end of the world. Then Mabel lashed out at him which made sense, but still was like. Dude, he just saved you and himself from the end of the world, like he said and no one believed him, give him a break. Still, so very awesome.

(This here :3)

Thank you, anon!! I’m so glad you liked it! I’ve been so juiced over this idea of Dipper losing his moral compass, and that final line of his manifesto gave me such chills I had to write it out.

As for Mabel—that’s more or less exactly what I was going for. I feel like the twins are both selfless, but in very very different ways. Mabel’s selflessness comes from empathy (think Love God). She likes cheering people up and helping them because her happiness hinges a bunch on the state of those around her. She wants to cover the world with smiles and stickers because, if everyone else is happy, it makes her happy.

Dipper’s selflessness is a lot more focused on feeding his own ego. He most likes helping people if, in the process, he can prove himself. (Headhunters, Dipper vs Manliness, The Inconveniencing). He’s selfless because it’ll make people like him. He’s helpful because it will earn him recognition. I think Mabel may be the only exception as someone he’d help regardless of the situation.

And that’s why his “scoff at the nonbelievers, laugh when they learn we were right, tell them they should have been nicer” stuff scares me so much. That’s the attitude someone like Dipper would adopt if all his efforts at being selfless and helpful got him nothing but scorn. He was willing to hate Grunkle Stan because he felt like he was made to do all these selfless things for Stan with no thanks or praise. Dipper’s inner good is conditional. So if his friends in Gravity Falls rebuked him, passed him off, I could 100% see him retaliating with the idea that “they had it coming” (The Golf War, Northwest Mansion Mystery!).

Mabel’s first reaction upon finding herself alive during The End would be to frantically try to save others. Her empathy’s too strong. The thought of all these people dying all around her would be overwhelming. She would have rather doubted Dipper as well, but not openly, their bond is too strong for either to completely revoke the other. Her first thought in that situation would not be about who was right and who was wrong—it would be about the people dying.

Dipper on the other hand would be much more preoccupied with the right vs. wrong question. Since he knew it was coming, he’s mentally prepared himself for The End. His biggest issue would be his own frustration when he realized no one believed him. It’s a slight against him, against his critical thinking, against his ability to discern what’s important. He’s a very logical person, and having his own reasoning questioned would be a personal insult. Dipper’s an eye-for-an-eye person. Dipper likes revenge. His empathy is nowhere near as strong as Mabel’s. His ego’s way too big for someone as small and teasable as he is. So IF the end came and no one believed him, it would be—if nothing else—the final, definitive thing to prove he was right and they were wrong.

And that’s why I’m so scared. This isn’t about “Mwahahahah Dipper has teh evilz now!” It’s not some dark!au for the sake of being cool and edgy. It’s not even that he would be evil. 

It’s that Dipper runs the risk of becoming jaded, and in that fault, he could so easily lose his drive to save people.

You know what?  Fuck this episode and fuck everything it made me feel.

Fuck John Winchester for psychologically screwing his kids:

Fuck Dean Winchester for believing himself worth so little.

Fuck Sam Winchester for apologizing for the crap he gave Dean then loading more on him, albeit unintentionally.

Fuck my heart for being so emotionally invested in a fictional set of brothers.

But mostly, fuck Castiel for not having a profound bond with Dean yet and not being there to lighten the mood with his cutie pie head tilt.

anonymous asked:

Narry for shipping

who’s the cuddler: they both are, niall’s the on who always pulls harry in when they are watching a mover or a match, just put an arm around him and pull him close distractedly. and harry is the one who always nuzzled him, when they are in bed and going to sleep and harry will just wrap himself around niall and nuzzle his neck.

who makes the bed: niall, i believe so since he’s virgo, harry always says he’ll do it after shower and changing clothes and breakfast and before harry gets into shower Niall has is made and when harry comes to see the made bed he’ll pout and say ‘i said i’d do it’ and niall will just rise and eyebrow at him

who wakes up first: harry, he waked up at wee hour of the morning and does some crazy yoga and makes himself smoothie and niall will always complaine about the noise of the blender and harry will just shush him as he slides back in bad to cuddle him and sleep some more

who has the weird taste in music: Harry, probably, he listens to indie bands and some weird melodies that sound more like various noises combined, and always try to make niall listen to it and niall will be like ‘terrible, i’m telling you, terrible’ and harry will pout and tell him he know nothing.

who is more protective: boooth, oh my god they both are, harry’s more obvious kind of protective, always speaking up when someone insults niall, purposely or not, he’ll get that offended face and tell them off and he’ll always check on niall when he falls or stumbles and make sure he’s knee’s are okay. and niall’s more subtle kind of protective, he won’t tell people off when they offend harry, he’ll just make a snarky comment about them too and squeeze harry’s thigh and always take care of him when he’s hurt, he probably even carries cartoon plasters with him all the time, because harry’s so clumsy 

who sings in the shower: both, harry liked to show off a lot and when he’s taking morning shower and his voice is deep and raspy niall will call him rod stewart and laugh. and they duet love song and laugh and kiss and kill me someone

who cries during movies: both? niall usually cries on sad movies and harry will cry tears of joy during happy movies or bawl on dog movies or something

who spends the most while out shopping: lol, harry, niall just wears whatever their stylist chooses for him but harry spends countless hours shopping in different store and sending niall picture of everything he like and waits for his approval 

who kisses more roughly: harry, he’s a sex fend and he just tries to transfer every kiss into make out session or sex, so he always bites and and pushes and i rough before niall hold him down and has to ground him

who is more dominant: niall, he wasn’t dominant with people a lot but harry’s natural sub so he’s taken up to in now

my rating of the ship from 1-10: 10 (thousand)

send be ships here :) x


Pairing: Dan Howell and Phil Lester

Word Count: 4555

Warnings: Anxiety, Depression

Fluff Fluff Fluff Angst? Fluff Fluff Fluff

Summary: Dan suffers from severe anxiety and hates talking to pretty much anyone. He meets Phil and something’s different. Only Phil can calm Dan.

From as young as 15 Dan Howell believed depression was just part of is personality. He thought being a sad, unhealthily unmotivated, social anxiety sufferer with an addiction to staying alone in his room was just him. Nothing was wrong, everything was just Dan.

Keep reading

Okay so…can we just pause and rewind for a second, and go back to when little!Murdoc was growing up in a turbulent home environment. Like, I know that we don’t know all the details of what when on, but knowing what we know from Rise of the Ogre When and even Murdoc himself saying that his father made sure make his childhood as traumatic as it could possibly be” (albeit jokingly but still…yikes)

In these situations people tend to develop certain skills (unhealthy or otherwise) as a way to avoid and/or diffuse situations that could potentially become dangerous. So it’s likely that Murdoc learned that becoming calculated, manipulative and caustic with his words helped him to curtail conflict at home and at school. For example, I believe he cites his verbal assault on a bully as one of the turning points of his childhood; a victory.

Essentially, it’s the skills he developed in childhood that helped him to survive and build some semblance of self-esteem. The thing is, having successfully escaped his home he really no longer has a need to be exploitative, conniving, abusive. But since that behavior has, up until creating the band that is, always helped him he continues it to a point where he’s actively harming those around him and engaging in all sorts of self-destructive behavior. Basically, the skills that helped him to become so resilient are the same skills that are now possible leading to his downfall, or at the very least pushing others away. It’s sad to think about, really…. it also induces a lot of cognitive dissonance as a fan, but I really like characters that challenge me like this…

We Must Make The Internet Safe For Those Who Agree With Us

So two days ago an article on Kernel started making the rounds on social media walls. The title is pure clickbait: “We Must Bulldoze What’s Left Of The Nerdy White Man’s Internet.” The article itself, while much lower key than the title might lead you to believe, is nonetheless rife with the same kind of doublethink that taints most articles about nerdy white men on the Internet - made more embarrassing by the fact that it’s written by literally a nerdy white male, although, like most nerdy white males who write this sort of claptrap, he sees himself as one of the ‘good ones.’ I’m not writing this to attack him personally though; he’s a Buzzfeed writer trained to generate clicks and linkage, and he does it very well. It’s the article itself I have an issue with.

It’s not the piss-poor metaphor that carries the article - an episode of Malcom in the Middle that starts with nerds manipulating others only to end up hung by their underwear on a fence - that I take issue with. It’s a bad metaphor anyway, and it ends with the somewhat odd takeaway of “Nerds are petty and childish so we should publicly humiliate them, but they’re also going to end up creating atomic bombs or modern equivalents.” Whether he intended that to be the end product or not, that’s what comes out. I personally don’t want anything I create to ever be responsible for the death of another person, let alone 246,000+, but that’s beside the point.

It’s also not the boneheaded way he ties together elements like Elliot Rodger, the Fappening, and GamerGate as products of the exact same group of people: a shadowy, undeniably white cabal of nerds hell-bent on mistreating women and just generally being insufferable little shits. Because all three of those fall under the label of ‘Nerd,’ they must all be responsible, right? Just like how all Muslims were responsible for the Charlie Hebdo attacks, right? Nevermind that Elliot Rodger was a mentally unstable individual who found a mirror for his own psychoses among ‘rational’ misogynists who then took advantage of him by fueling that insanity. Nevermind that the Fappening, while a misogynist catastrophe and just a generally shitty thing, was motivated by cold, inhuman greed. And nevermind GamerGate, the movement that has never made its dislike of individuals like Anita Sarkeesian and Zoe Quinn unknown, but has also gone out of its way to condemn and track attacks on them. Also nevermind that GamerGate has donated money to anti-bullying and other good causes both before and since the harassment allegations began, a move that should have satisfied  that outrage-driven ‘individuals responsible for the whole’ rhetoric that got Rupert Murdoch so much heat. Nevermind all of that.

What I take issue with is the article’s final bold declaration: “THE SUFFERING NERD IS DEAD.”

That statement couldn’t be further from the truth.

The so-called Suffering Nerd is alive and suffering in new, imaginative ways every day.

Since nerds became A Thing, they have endured both psychological and physical abuse. It starts in school, and I don’t have to relate stories about being stuffed into lockers or having your book stolen or your instrument broken or being told by their parents to put down the comics and go out and find a nice boy/girl; everyone knows those stories even if it didn’t happen to them personally. I now work around both middle school and high school kids, and I can tell you from multiple firsthand experiences it hasn’t changed. The cool kids who are into what’s popular still shit on the uncool kids who are into what’s weird, only this time the cool kids are wearing Avengers and Batman t-shirts. Imagine how it must feel to be told you’re gay and stupid by someone wearing a shirt with a character you love or even identify with on it.

In older, ‘real people’ land - let’s face it, kids are probably always going to be terrible to one another since at that point their brains (and thus moral centers) are still developing - we have a similar situation. The article talks about Game of Thrones’ wild popularity, but fails to acknowledge that the first book existed for FIFTEEN YEARS in the same derisive, “you reading the dictionary?” obscurity that other fantasy works like the Wheel of Time or Discworld books still exist in before it became mainstream and ‘cool;’ it was first published in 1996 and won a Hugo award in 1997, but it didn’t hit #1 on the New York Times bestseller list until 2011. Comic book movies are similarly huge, and put nerds in a similar position of watching as a thing they’ve treasured is taken up by the same people who treated them like shit as kids or just stood by and let it happen. I had a discussion with one of my friends from high school about how oftentimes these sorts of things do turn back to school-related tropes, and it’s no surprise; nerds endure so much mockery for being different in that phase that the wounds follow them the rest of their lives. It also doesn’t help that those wounds aren’t allowed to heal.

Television shows like The Big Bang Theory and King of the Nerds parade the most harmful stereotypes of nerd culture in front of ‘normal’ people on a weekly basis like a circus freak show, portraying all nerds as wildly eccentric, barely functioning individuals who latch onto ridiculous things in an effort to fill the gaping voids in their own brains where normal human interaction would usually go. The sense of humor in The Big Bang Theory is especially toxic because it relies on references at the expense of its characters instead of genuine humor; when a character mentions he was playing D&D, the audience erupts into laughter not because of anything that happened WHILE the character was playing D&D, but because the act of playing D&D is ‘funny’ in and of itself since it’s weird and abnormal. Nerds in film aren’t treated much better; at best they’re usually the voice behind a computer screen and empty bags of Cheetos who help the much more physically-oriented hero defeat the bad guys. There are rare exceptions; Chris Hemsworth’s character in the movie Blackhat was portrayed as a computer genius, but he’s also an action hero who shoots guns and is CHRIS FUCKING HEMSWORTH, as opposed to someone who actually looks like a nerd and can be related to by nerds like Danny Pudi or Jorge Garcia or Justin Long.

So nerds are told by their peers AND the media that they’re abnormal and weird unless they only like stuff that’s already popular with ‘normal’ people, so where else do they turn?

The Internet.

And this brings us to the current cultural conflict raging across Tumblr and Twitter and a lot of other websites involving the letter R. In a thread on the GamerGate board about the article in question, one individual responded with this:

The text is probably too small to read, so I’ll paste it here:

-White male nerds (Really, all nerds, geeks, etc. This isn’t about race or gender no matter how much they would like it to be.) chased to the internet, gaming, tabletop, comics, and so on by bullies throughout their schooling.
-Build up their communities apart from the “jocks”, the “preps”, etc.
-Suddenly the mediums the nerds found joy in become popular in the mainstream.
-Outsiders, rather than create their own communities, attempt to weasel their way into existing ones where they are not wanted.
-Rationalize the backlash as being against their gender or their race instead of who they are as people while simultaneously erasing the bigotry the nerds faced that resulted in them turning to these forms of entertainment to begin with, transforming them in the overall narrative from the oppressed to the oppressors.

Did I miss anything?

Also, here’s the picture for completeness' sake:

It’s an oversimplification, but not a gross one. Since the Internet became A Thing it’s been the refuge of nerds, like the libraries, bathrooms, and empty stairwells of old. The anonymity meant that you were judged based on what you had to say alone, and when anyone, boy or girl, chose to distinguish themselves individually from the rest of the mass, they were welcomed as long as they had something worthwhile to say. There were always a few sexist, awkward morons around, but by and large the vast majority of people didn’t give a shit what was in your pants as long as you loved video games or Star Wars or whatever the board you were posting on was dedicated to.

However, as the Internet became more popular, it became less of a Nerd Thing. Just like Game of Thrones or The Avengers becoming popular with non-nerd people, this isn’t inherently a bad thing; unlike those previous forms, which already have contexts attached to them exclusively by the people who enjoyed them before they were cool, the Internet is what you make of it, and so when non-nerd people created social websites like Facebook, nobody’s jimmies got rustled.

It’s when non-nerd people discovered pre-existing communities and tried to inject themselves that some of the trouble started. These newcomers didn’t understand the practices, lingo, memes, or context that were already tradition to those who began and cultivated those communities, and while many took the sound advice of ‘LURK MOAR,’ (‘lurking’ here meaning just browsing or reading the forum in order to learn the customs and norms without posting and degrading the discussion) many didn’t. Imagine a gradual influx of tourists to a country that poorly imitate the natives’ accents and mannerisms, or a new addition to a comedy troupe who does nothing but spout old jokes that someone else wrote at every occasion whether it’s funny or not. Non-nerd newcomers saw this strange, almost coded world of nerds, and wanted in. The vast majority of those communities wanted the newcomers out, but because of the anonymity, had precious few ways of keeping them out. Now if there’s one thing that nerds hate, it’s fakeness; people enjoying something or pretending to be an expert on something when they haven’t ‘paid their dues.’ Paying your dues can range from the abuse endured as a kid for enjoying the stuff you enjoy and then continuing to enjoy that stuff in spite of the abuse to spending enough time on an internet forum to actually know how to communicate in the memetic language of the people who created the forum in the first place. It’s not that different from any other specialized society or group; once you’re in, you’re in, but until then keep your fucking mouth shut.

In all honesty, newcomers, while annoying, are tolerable because they’re inevitable. We were all noobs once, and once someone learns to stop being a noob, they gain proper entrance into the community and can join in a discussion like a normal nerd. The current wave of backlash rising like a Red Lantern’s bile isn’t, in fact, about newcomers at all.

It’s about people who haven’t paid their dues trying to control or outright eradicate societies they don’t like and have no interest in joining in the first place.

For example - and I feel like this is some low-hanging fruit here - Feminist Frequency. Anita Sarkeesian isn’t a gamer - she’s stated as much - and while that doesn’t mean she shouldn’t be allowed to criticize video games, it does mean that her criticism should be taken with large amounts of salt. After all, who should you listen to; an expert on the field or an outsider with none?

Now, to be fair, I actually don’t have a problem with anyone looking for social justice. I find my goals align with theirs more often than not; I thought this year’s Oscar speeches were shockingly refreshing (with a brief stop at Patricia Arquette’s somewhat odd backstage comments), I try to keep a check on my middle-class white male privilege, and I’ve lost track of the number of times in my life when I’ve stepped in (my larger size was a fairly effective deterrent against potential bullies, thankfully) and told some oppressive motherfuckers that they need to cut that shit out. But I draw the line at social policing, because it’s hypocritical and guilty of the same closed-minded, frothing rage that drives many of the evils it seeks to destroy, but it feels justified in its extremism because it’s “on the side of the angels.” You know, just like its opponents feel.

For example, in Broderick’s article he talks about Reddit’s thriving scummy hive of pick-up artists (which I’m definitely not giving any clickage to), a social group that Elliot Rodger was a part of. Pick-up artists are pathetic individuals who want to balance the equation of human interaction so that the sum is getting laid, and that’s pretty shitty. Unfortunately, that’s generally as far as most people get when talking about PUAs: they’re misogynist losers who see women as objects. While that’s not false, PUAs themselves are symptomatic of a bigger problem in society (one also primarily perpetrated by dudes, sadly) that teaches young men to view women as objects and sex as an ultimate goal rather than…well, anything else, really; a possible part of an intimate relationship, a casual agreement between friends, the result of two people who actually really hate each other but the bed game ridiculous, etc. Pick-up ‘artistry’ (more like ‘pick up assholery,’ am I right?) is the result of prejudice, and prejudice and hate, while not exactly the same model, are very similar machines that run off of the same fuel: belief. In this case, it’s several tenets of belief:

- Women are not complex beings but machines who respond to certain stimulus with certain responses
- Sex is the ultimate goal in human interaction and possibly life

When young men are taught that the previous two statements are absolute bunk not just by their role models but by their peers, who reinforce stereotypes and lessons they learn more than anyone else the men will be exposed to, something miraculous will happen; pick-up artistry will cease to be, or at least return to its more benign, pre-Internet form were teenage dudes give each other godawful advice on how to simply communicate with girls not because they’re trying to get into anyone’s pants, but because they’re overwhelmed by the sanity-blasting, hormonal hurricane that is speaking to someone you think is cute while you’re both hitting puberty. The need for a cultural bulldozer evaporates entirely because the machine has no fuel on which to run.

"But SaigonTime," I can hear some of you asking, "Bulldozers are a hell of a lot faster than education and cultural shifts, and PUAs are literally making the world a worse place just by existing." I can’t disagree with any of that, because it’s all true. It’s a lot easier to just shut down a community and ban its members from the board, but the problem is that it doesn’t solve anything. Getting the mice out of the cellar is a lot less impressive when they live in an apartment building with infinity floors.

The Internet is incomparably, incomprehensibly vast. There’s a song on it that is going to be 1,000 years long when it’s finished. Unlike a house or even the Earth, the Internet is virtually (har har) limitless. If one messageboard is shut down, its members will just migrate somewhere else or even start their own messageboard free from previous restrictions. If somehow that messageboard gets shut down, guess what? The members migrate and rebuild again. It’s an endless cycle, one that benefits no one; the ones who shut things down gain a moral victory, but accomplish literally nothing, and the ones who were shut down get their ‘me against the world’ view validated by the repeated attacks. In fact, the constant victimization will no doubt draw potential supporters to their cause.

"But SaigonTime," I can still hear some of you asking, "Why don’t we just stop them from talking about it?" Well, that’s where I get off, because you’re talking about censorship and thought policing.

Everyone in the world thinks things would be better if everyone agreed with them. It’s human nature. We hold to our convictions, and the more people try to tear us away, the closer we hold those beliefs. Rare is the individual who enjoys being proven wrong. But cultural bulldozing, the kind of burn and salt the fucking Earth approach that many others (oddly NOT the writer of the article in question since he settles for just allowing the ‘manosphere’ to die out over time) have advocated against this nebulous white male gamer identity is wrong. Morally wrong.

Consider, for a second, that you’re not on the side of the angels. Consider there are no angels at all, just human beings trying to do the best they can. Net neutrality and free speech is what prevents regular human beings, nerds and non alike, from having their feeds filled with whatever their ISP approves of. Whatever their government approves of. Whatever whoever is in power approves of. Every person has a right to disagree with anyone else the same as every person has a right to say and think whatever they want (although it doesn’t protect them from the consequences of or reactions to their ideas) but when arguments start to be made for the benefits of removing someone’s right to believe, not even say, but BELIEVE what they want to, there’s a line that should never be crossed being crossed, and being crossed in the name of the righteous - historically rarely a good sign. Still not convinced? Check out these tweets from opponents of gay marriage on the subject who believe its supporters should be…well, I’ll just let you read:

"If gay marriage becomes legal, I will strangle every fag and dyke into the dirt with my tiny, feral claws."

"I hope a new law passes so it’s legal to spit in the faces of #GayMarriage supporters. Not that I don’t already, but MAKE IT LEGAL!"

"I don’t want to offend anyone, but it would be pretty funny if every single person who tweeted the #GayMarriage hashtag drowned."

"Ultimately #GayMarriage is reaffirming what we’ve known for decades: fags should be constantly shamed and degraded into submission."

Pretty horrific, huh? These people would rather live in a world where gay marriage isn’t even a possibility, and its supporters are humiliated, degraded, and even denied the right to live. It’s monstrous.

It’s also not exactly accurate. The four aforementioned tweets were actually in reaction to GamerGate and its alleged harassment campaign.

The first tweet comes Twitter user ‘Ram,’ (who has since set his feed to private) who declared

If TotalBiscuit wins this award at the VGAs I will strangle every single self proclaimed “gamer” into the dirt with my tiny, feral claws.

The second Tweet comes from Twitter user @ApexFeminist, who stated:

I hope a new law passes so it’s legal to spit in the faces of #GamerGate supporters. Not that I don’t already, but MAKE IT LEGAL !

The third tweet comes from Ben Dreyfuss, an editor for Mother Jones:

I don’t want to offend anyone, but it would be pretty funny if every single person who tweeted the #gamergate hashtag drowned.

The final tweet comes from Gawker’s own editor-in-chief Sam Biddle, who originally tweeted

Ultimately #GamerGate is reaffirming what we’ve known to be true for decades: nerds should be constantly shamed and degraded into submission

The Suffering Nerd is dead indeed. Nerds are obviously cool and hip and loved by everyone because being a nerd is just so cool and chic.

Is such wanton hate ever justifiable? I don’t feel like it is. I’m liberal as shit, and I feel like our greatest weapons should be compassion and empathy and learning, not thought policing, censorship, and revisionism. That’s what the Other Guys do. I support gay marriage, but I do it because I think two consenting adults should be able to be together in every sense of the word, not because I think straight people shouldn’t have the right all to themselves.

The Golden Rule, the one I was personally brought up on, is “Treat others how you want to be treated.” Cultural bulldozing violates that right, because it’s hypocrisy in its most pure, distilled form. If you, the reader, felt any sort of negative gut reaction from the first pack of tweets but then felt betrayed or hoodwinked when I showed you what they were really about, then, although far be it from me to tell you how to live your life, you should probably take a look at your own compass. If you’re alright with bulldozing and violent rhetoric, if you’re alright with treating others like human waste, then why would you want to be treated in any other fashion? And, furthermore, if you want to live in a world where people are this wretched to each other and everyone’s okay with it, then what the fuck is wrong with you?

When they first made up, Emmett allowed himself to believe that Liz really had forgiven him wholeheartedly, even if he hadn’t completely forgiven himself. It was easy to see that she wasn’t entirely over it, though. She’d be fine one minute and giving him the cold shoulder the next. Rather than working hard to redeem himself, Emmett was sulking. He’d been paying more attention to the dog than to Liz. 

He couldn’t sleep well, so he left her in bed and went downstairs. It didn’t take long for him to get restless. Emmett went out to get food without waking her. He didn’t remember that it was Valentine’s day until he left the house. “Shit…” He’d have to do something for her. She always insisted she didn’t care about Valentine’s day, but he was sure that she was just saying that. Maybe he could make her dinner…even though he was only really good at making a few things that she was probably sick of by that point. While he was still making up his mind, the lights went off around him. By the sounds of the hollering coming from the pit, the power went off everywhere. It wasn’t the first time it had happened. Then he remembered: Liz. She was alone in a relatively unfamiliar house — in the dark. She was just starting to be able to close her eyes again without feeling uncomfortable. This wouldn’t go over well. Hopefully, she was still asleep.

He managed to make it back to the house fairly quickly, but the darkness slowed him down. The complete lack of windows in Dauntless didn’t exactly help. Emmett entered the house and stumbled over a box that was still sitting out on the floor. “Liz?” He called, squinting into the darkness. He could feel Psycho running around at his feet. Emmett went to the kitchen and rummaged for a flashlight, eventually finding one and navigating his way through the house.

When Satotz is talking to Gon about everything that happened while he was out, one of the things Satotz says is “He probably disqualified himself voluntarily.” (correct me if I am wrong, but I don’t believe this line specifically was in the anime).

Killua doing so purposefully is obviously because of everything that transpired during his match with Illumi, but I wonder if that was really everything that made him lose his mind. I believe Illumi was the the last and most important factor, but while reading the manga, it seemed to me as though Killua was already irritated with the last exam due to many different reasons.

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