It’s an EMS Life ….
What you can expect from making a living on an ambulance
1 You’ll find it hard to start relationships because alone time will become a precious thing.
2 Your sense of humor will degrade into the politically incorrect and socially unacceptable
3 You’ll eventually start swearing like a sailor and you won’t even notice yourself doing it.
4 You’ll turn into an anorak/monomaniac and always turn all conversations back EMS
5 You’ll earn a pittance for years/decades.
6 You’ll either lose a vast amount of weight or gain a vast amount of weight.
7 You’ll never ever have a tan ever again. (Unless you buy it)
8 You won’t become famous.
9 You’ll develop a habit, whether it be coffee, cigarettes, alcohol, gambling, or even red bull.
10 Your feet will get destroyed.
11 Your back will get destroyed.
12 Your hands will get destroyed.
13 You’ll live in a constant state of sleep deprivation, indefinitely.
14 You’ll have to ask your friends to plan everything around your schedule, which is in complete opposition with their availability, because you never know your days off in advance and you probably won’t be able to change it….and you are an hour whore to make ends meet.
15 You’ll become jaded to the ability of people to tell the truth
16 You’ll become more prone to temper flare ups
17 Your awareness of other people’s lack of efficiency and common sense will increase and your tolerance of it will decrease.
18 You’ll spend the largest part of your life cooped up in a small, undecorated truck or station with crappy air conditioning, poor heat and a small group of people who will become your only social interactions.
19 You will work longer hours than you ever imagined possible or thought legal.
20 Your shortest work days will be longer than most people’s longest, and your longer workdays, which make up about half of your working week, will be longer than the average person is awake in a day.
21 You will probably start eating mostly fast food and cheap instant noodles.
22 You will be the subject of abuse, whether physical or emotional. Officially, it will be as a test of character. In reality, it will be as a form of entertainment.
23 You will end up spending so much time at work that your colleagues will know you better than your spouse/family/friends do.
24 You will meet and form strong bonds with types of people whom you’d previously never even have imagined sharing conversations with.
25 You will be in a constant state of stress.
26 You will never be irreplaceable and will be expected to constantly give 110%.
27 You will always be exhausted.
28 You will not be allowed to call in sick for a hangover.
29 You will be expected to place your work before any other part of your life in your list of priorities.
30 You will never be congratulated on your work.
31 You will be expected to treat your superiors as absolute masters and never answer back, try to explain yourself, start a conversation, or show any other type of insubordination, even if you know that they are in the wrong or feel as if their behavior towards you is unacceptable.
32 You will be expected to trot out “worst call ever” stories at every family gathering…EVER.
33 At least one year out of two, and maybe every year, you will work Christmas, New Year’s Eve, Easter, Valentine’s day, Mother’s day, Father’s day, bank holidays, Halloween, your birthday, and pretty much every other day of celebration on the calendar.
34You will make mistakes, and every time you do make a mistake, someone will notice it and make you understand that you are clearly a subhuman because only a subhuman could make such a mistake.
35 If you are a woman, you will constantly be the subject of misogynist remarks and jokes,sexual harassment, belittlement and remarks about your menstrual cycle.
36 None of your friends or family will understand what is involved in your work and you will never be able to make them understand.
37 You will spend vast amounts of money on equipment, books, and training which will leave you with not much money for other things.
38 You will develop a creepy obsession with needles.
39 If you are a Basic, you will develop a creepy obsession with Trauma Scissors
40 If you are the right type of person, you will thank your lucky star every single day for the rest of your life for making you take the best decision you ever did and become an EMT or Paramedic And you will fall in love with your job and never look back.