WHAT EVEN IS THAT LOOK HE GIVES HER

anonymous asked:

Nannies have crossed the line!!! Wiki's received an email that says they handed BC a letter outing some skeptics (name, age, location). You were in that list :/

Little old me! Well at least I might be receiving a personal visit from BC when he comes to Met Gala if he even gives a fuck or gives a second look at the piece of paper….Should I start searching for the best tea in the US and get a special baby bottle or should I get his and her towels? What’ya think?

You’ll do well, kid

As expected, it didn’t really sting having to give Paladin away. He was a good Metagross and battled well, but he just didn’t seem to fit with the others. Andy didn’t bond with him as well and she honestly wanted to just keep Pokemon she could bond properly with.

So when she found out a parent was looking for a decent first Pokemon for their kid who wanted to start his journey, she decided it couldn’t hurt to give it a try. 

Paladin made a quite displeased noise when Andy went over him with a wet sponge.
“You have to look your best, Paladin. And behave. They’ll be here soon and I wanna make sure they’re decent people.” 

Even though he knew what was happening he naturally felt a little sad. He’d accepted it and wasn’t upset about leaving Andy. But he’d been with her since he was a Beldum and she’d raised him to a pretty good Metagross. But sometimes it didn’t last and she knew he’d be better off with someone else.

“It’s gonna be fine, you big dork. Imagine how happy that kid is gonna be when he sees what a cool Pokemon you are.” she gave him one of her rare, genuine smiles that only Rori and her Pokemon got to see.
“Okay, you’re done. Let’s go meet them, they should be here now.”


The kid wasn’t older than at least 12. His name was Aaron and he was understandably excited about going on his journey. But he’d been too late to pick up one of the starters, leading his mom to do what she’d done.

Aaron stared up at the big Metagross. He couldn’t be more than five feet tops. Not that Andy was that much taller, but he was still a scrawny thing.
“What’s his name?” he asked.

“Paladin.” she told him, while Paladin watched the boy. He was small but he seemed like a nice kid. Aaron gently put his hands on the Steel type and smiled.
“He’s so pretty.” he said and looked at Andy again. “Can I really have him?”

“Mhm. He doesn’t really fit with my team so I want him to go to someone who can take better care of him. He’s a very good Pokemon and I can assure you he’ll keep you safe from any danger.”

“I can’t believe my first Pokemon is a shiny. This is so cool!” Aaron’s eyes were sparkling and Andy couldn’t remember the last time she saw a kid this excited and happy about something. Not many kids got a shiny for a starter so she knew this made it extra exciting for him.

“Are you sure this is okay for you?” His mother asked. She’d seemed a bit hesitant at first, Paladin was pretty big. But he was also quite docile and didn’t mind getting touched at all. On the contrary he quite enjoyed the affection.

“One hundred percent. I’d trust Paladin with my life. He’ll be a good Pokemon for your boy.” Andy gave her a nod and put her hands in her pockets. It would feel a bit sad to part with Paladin, no matter how close or distant they’d been. It always felt that way when parting with a Pokemon and she did miss her Kalos team sometimes (she’d released them before moving back to Hoenn) but sometimes you just had to make tough decisions.

“Thank you, Miss!” Aaron grinned from ear to ear and even gave Andy a hug, which surprised her. She awkwardly hugged him back. He looked so happy… Paladin was in good hands and so was this kid.

“Alright alright. You have an adventure waiting for you. Better not waste more time.” she gave his hair a ruffle and handed him Paladin’s Pokeball.
“Here you, kid. And don’t hesitate to call me. I’d like to know if Paladin’s kicking a….butt out there.”

“Okay!” Aaron smiled and called Paladin into his ball before running back to the car.

“This is really kind of you.” His mother smiled at her. “Please take care.” she said and returned as well. When they were gone, Andy took a deep breath and wiped her eyes. That damn dust…
“You’ll do good, kid.” she muttered before heading inside.

Brett Talbot ➢ Different

“So werecoyote, huh?” Brent asked suddenly trying to lessen the awkward tension that was begging to be addressed.

Malia Hale and Brett Talbot had nothing in common. They hadn’t even been in the same pack until recently and to top it off, they weren’t even friends.

Thinking back to one conversation Malia had with Stiles, she could clearly remember him saying he didn’t trust Brett. If Stiles didn’t trust him, then neither did she.

“Are you seriously going to ignore me?” he grumbled with a sigh.

Emotionlessly, she glanced over her shoulder to give him a pointed look. He took that as a yes and for the next two minutes they sat in silence again.

“Jeez crazy pants, what died inside of you?” he muttered bitterly knowing very well that she could hear him clearly.

She growled ferociously, her eyes glowing a threatening blue. Her lip pulled over her canines as a low growl rumbled in her chest. He chuckled leaning back in his seat. At least he’d gotten some type of reaction out of her.

“I’m not crazy.” she hissed through clenched teeth. If he almost hadn’t been killed last week by rouge hunters he might of actually been afraid of her.

With a smirk he leaned in dangerously close. “Oh right, you’re just different aren’t you, Malia Hale?”

Her eyes narrowed on the beta. She wanted to tell him her last name wasn’t Hale, but she knew he probably didn’t care.

__________________________________________

I haven’t posted in a while. Still trying to catch up on requests and what not, but I’m still open for more (:

i wonder if deep down, how mahri is (and since you have him all over your blog this includes grimmjow just a bit) is what sera wishes she could actually be… a truly loose canon, and not give a damn.

but its not in her personality, or even purpose as mother nature… it’s all balance and order… cycles and stuff… she’d like to say have at it… but nope… responsibility is a burden… >.>

thenightmaregeneral 

also he looks really awesome, so… happy it’s worrisome O.o i thought hidan was bad… 0.0

how blood of olympus should've ended

White sand gave way to clear, bright blue water.

A young, tan man with 12-pack abs  wore only a tight, tropical g-string. He carried a platter with a drink on it to a small old lady, stretched out on a lounge chair.

“Your Frozen Mango Margarita, Ms. Zhang,” he said.

Grandma Zhang tipped her sunglasses down, sitting up and giving the man a dirty look. 

“I asked for…” She flipped the tray out of his hand, “A  MOJITO DEL SOL. YOU’VE DISGRACED ME! EVEN MY STUPID GRANDSON WOULDN’T FUCK UP LIKE THIS!”

The man cowered. Zhang sighed sharply.

“Is there anything else you’d like to tell me?”

He whimpered, “…Your grandson had….no character development in this book. The little elf one killed Gaea.”

“WELL WHAT THE FUCK?”  Grandma Zhang roared.

She couldn’t believe it. She grabbed her huge granny tote from the side of her chair and dug through it. From it she pulled a small remote.

“It’s for a re-do,” she said, a finger hovering over the big red button. “I hope that Luke boy doesn’t die again. Anyway…I swear if they fuck this up again…” she pressed it. For a moment, there was a loud buzzing. The scene shifted to a museum, a wheel-chaired man teaching a rowdy class and a young boy with sea-green eyes…

Look…he began, I didn’t want to be a half-blood.

Wyldstyle wants so bad to be a hero. She wants to be special so much it drives her entire character arc. She literally named herself WYLDSTYLE. So when Emmet is chosen to be The Special, better than everyone else and destined to save the all the worlds, it eats her up- especially when Emmet is shown to be just another average Joe that never thinks outside of what the world tells him to think. 

But the difference is, he is the special…because EVERYONE is, including her. Her growth isn’t about Becoming the Sidekick, but learning that all the people she looked down on for not being a Master Builder has it within them to be a Master Builder, that everyone that she hoped she was better than turned out to be The Special. Even the ending isn’t about Emmet ~FULFILLING THE PROPHECY~. He gives Lord Business the power to be The Special, too. And Lord Business takes it.

THE LEGO MOVIE IS SO GREAT

so like

what if the reason that lila said “i would have never even flirted with darcy if you weren’t in my head all the time” wasn’t because of something about the drug-dealing but instead was because she and rebecca had kissed earlier - maybe on the roof of the sorority house

and the only reason that she even considered flirting with “darcy” (aka sam) was to get the thought of rebecca out of her head, to reassure herself that she was straight even though she wasn’t. what if the only reason she got back together with griffin was to reaffirm that she was straight, both to rebecca and to herself? 

like can you imagine it - rebecca and lila on the roof of the sorority house one night, lila talking about darcy and having sex with him or how he’s so sweet and rebecca just leans over and says “stop talking” and lila just gives her this look and rebecca leans over and kisses her. and lila likes it, she actually likes it, but she can hear footsteps and someone’s coming up onto the roof and she pushes rebecca away and hisses, “get the hell out of here,” and she never tells her that she actually returns her feelings

Girl next door

This fic basically just landed on my mental doorstep and BOOM now it’s here. It’s been sitting in my drafts for a while, but I thought I’d finally put it out there. Bellarke fanfiction gives me life. This is the first time I’ve actually written something myself, though. Hope you enjoy!

Summary: Bellamy’s gone from being a bit of an outcast to being the whipping boy of the popular kids. He’s about to end it himself (probably badly), when someone steps up and helps him out. 

Rated: M (implied smut, definitely inappropriate) (not sorry)

Word count: 5420

Bellarke High School AU

He wasn’t even hitting on her. Had they looked at her? Not his type at all. Why the hell would he even bother? She wouldn’t even be able to give him decent conversation. He had just asked her what fucking time it was.

Wrong move.

It seemed like there was no limit to how people could annoy him. They had bombarded him into ‘the guy that tried to get into Marjorie’s pants and failed miserably because look at him’ and they just wouldn’t leave him the fuck alone. Honestly, all he wanted out of High School was to pass through it quietly without having to deal with all these stupid people. Even his best friend was acting ridiculous: he was ready to beat the crap out of these old-school bullies. But if these guys managed to do anything, it was only make him despise them more.

They came at him during lunch. Again. Just the football kids, slick little ass-kissers with too much testosterone.

“Well, look at that, it’s that ass-wipe. Ready to fuck another sex doll tonight?” The main guy thrust into the air obscenely and awkwardly. He was way too familiar with the vulgar movement himself. Bellamy wouldn’t be surprised if he’d given at least five girls an STD that year and another five a baby. As always, he ignored him. They weren’t worth it anyway. Although he was getting thoroughly annoyed with them disturbing him all the time. One of these days he might say something stupid and get beaten up for it. That would be a day to look forward to.

Nevertheless, this day everything changed. Everything changed, because he obviously wasn’t the only one who was fed up with the situation.

“Watch what you’re saying, Cage,” she said as she approached them. 

Keep reading

Coulson coughs, annoyance abundant even in the little sound, “Sergeant Barnes is currently on leave from missions until I say he is cleared. And he is here because we do not know the calibre of the threat. And until then, he’s here for your safety,” he gives Darcy a meaningful look, “not for anything else.”

Darcy pouts, “oooh shit, what did he do to piss you off?”

“Classified.”

She rolls her eyes, “fine, but how long are we going to be followed?”

“Until we neutralize the threat.”

Jane groans and sinks into her chair like a petulant five year old, waiting for her parents to decide on her punishment.

“So, I guess it’s settled then,” Coulson clasps his hands together, “Sergeant Barnes is your new detail.”

“Ugh, whatever. Do what you want,” Jane rises from her chair and exits the room.

She slams the door.

Darcy lets her eyes linger on the door before she frowns, “uh, the idea will grow on her.”

Coulson’s eyebrow dubiously rises, “I’m sure it will. Lewis, show Sergeant Barnes the labs and the lounge areas and areas that you both frequent.”

She cringes,“ Yeah about that, it’s kind of my day off, can this wait until- fine, Jesus Christ, just stop glowering. The look isn’t becoming on you.”

i was working with a 7th grader on friday and she had tech ed and the teacher was already being a dick and then one of the girls had on a tank top (not even like a spaghetti strap, like it had thick straps) and it was pretty fucking hot in the room. and so u could see the girls bra straps just bc of the way the tank top was or w/e and the teacher was like “so and so, cover up i shouldnt see straps” and he just said it in a really rude way and he clearly embarrassed the girl and i was like fuming because its yet another case of a 40 year old man sexualize a fucking 13 year old girls shoulders and i was just so mad ok

safelycapricious asked:

"Come on, just hit me!" Lance and Jemma Brotp.

“Seriously?” May asks. She actually sounds excited. For May anyway. 

To be quite honest, Lance is right there with her. Everything about this little powwow they’re having is a bit off the wall, even for SHIELD.

“Seriously,” Coulson says. He gestures vaguely to the middle of the room, where Ward is still standing. He doesn’t look like a guy expecting to be hit until he passes out, which is essentially what he is. 

Coulson wanted the team back and Ward wanted back on the team. The deal they struck gives everyone who Ward betrayed permission to hit him once, no questions asked, no grudges held (at least on Ward’s part). Hell, it was even Ward’s idea! And now that the dust has settled and Bobbi’s SHIELD wannabes have been kicked out, it’s time for Ward to pay the piper. Pipers. Whatever. Lance doesn’t care about semantics. He wasn’t on the team back when Ward went all psycho, so he doesn’t get a punch, but he does get to watch. He even brought popcorn.

Keep reading

People were running around the place, hectic was probably an understatement. Around every turn you would come across somebody doing some odd, drinking some beverages even though most the people here were underage. It was just one of Bradley’s famous house parties, held at least once every few weeks. Everybody always loved these parties, because it gave them something to look forward too. Plus, most of the time Bradley’s parents were away and knew about what was happening back here. Both of his parents were more than fine with it.

After having his girlfriend give him her opinion on everything, he just decided to walk away. He didn’t need to have her dictating his every last move he made. She seemed to moaning about him kissing girls on the cheeks, and it pissed him off. He was allowed friends, and he was allowed to be friendly with them if he liked. Bradley was an independent person, and having somebody on his case all the time just got his nerves. With a slight huff falling forming on his lips, he sat down on his bed, hands running through his thick blonde locks. “Why does she have to try and ruin everything?” he muttered, under his breath.

anonymous asked:

I read your asks about Robin and I get what you're saying. You make good points and I can't blame Robin for trying to move on with his life and do what's right for "his wife". I get it. However, that is not the kind of LI I want for Regina. The thing is, I want Regina to have someone who will do whatever it takes to get back to her even if it seems impossible. I want someone who'd mourn the loss of her for more than a few days, definitely unable to renew a relationship even if it seems right.(1)

Someone who would look at his “wife” and tell her that he’s there for her and for their son and they’ll try to navigate this together, but he can’t give her what she wants, a romantic relationship because it’s not fair to her or the woman he loves. Basically, I want someone who would not give up the moment he stepped over the town line and try to move on 3 days after that. Like I said, I understand Robin, but it’s not the kind of character I wanted for Regina. (2)


If Robin is not the kind of love interest you want for Regina, then you are free to stop shipping them.


But I would also like to point out that Regina gave up, too, and way before Robin did. The MINUTE he was across the town line, she was ripping up the emblem of their hope, dropping it to the pavement, and walking away. 


And then she went back for it. 


So does Regina get to doubt and lose hope, but Robin doesn’t? Or do we not care what kind of love interest Robin has, we just want to protect Regina from loving someone real and complex and imperfect?


We’ve been given a moment of Robin’s journey where he lost hope and made a choice that maybe we don’t like. We have gotten NOTHING of any of his feelings in the 8 weeks since then. We probably didn’t even get his true feelings in that moment, if his conflicted face in the shower moments before was any indication. I’d hardly say he’s stopped mourning her - especially considering we have the actor who portrays him, who has seen the season in its entirety, saying that Robin has been thinking of her constantly. 


But again - Robin did what he did, he is who he is, and if that is not the love interest you want for Regina, then feel free to jump ship. Nobody is stopping you.

One of my coworkers at work is a 52 y/o women [who is coincidentally the mother of someone who loathes me] says “YAAS” like that’s just how she says yes and she’s very nice AND ADORABLE and also very pretty and she’s very sweet to me and helps me a lot and bless that women why couldnt her saughter have gained her manners

tulitie asked:

brand new neighbours au please? :)

A Warm Welcoming

“Take your filthy newspaper subscriptions elsewhere! I ain’t buying any!”

Petra concludes her new neighbour isn’t exactly newspaper-friendly, or even remotely neighbour-friendly, but that doesn’t mean she’s going to be so mean. Or rude. Or loud. At least not yet, if he doesn’t give her any reason to be so. “I’m your next door neighbour and-”

The door swings open, revealing a really dishevelled and somehow good looking dude, with an equally horrible looking scowl on his face. “What? I only moved in three days ago and don’t recall doing anything stupid enough to offend others.”

He doesn’t let the word “yet” slip out.

Keep reading

“ BEST WORST THING ”   ●  kylie

Tequila was the shittiest of the shit. Even top self–the taste was pungent; not something one could merely forget. But Tyler made it a point to always have a fifth of alcohol somewhere on his persona for he could never know when a situation such as this would arise. Kylie wanted to get trashed, and who was he to deny a woman of anything she wanted?  Thankfully his roommates were out and about in the house, giving them ( for the moment ) some private time to see how much of this they could drink before someone either passed out or threw up. Or hell, even both. The youngest Jenner sister always had been fun to be around. Tyler liked her. She was loud, sarcastic, and she said what she thought, much like he did. Throwing on a black wife-beater, fingers ruffling through his messy black locks, he didn’t make much of an effort to look good. They were drinking after all. Besides, Kylie was the gorgeous one. She had enough looks for them both, he was sure. The door to his room was open as he opened the bottle, the strong smell instantly hitting his nostrils. His eyes moved up as he saw her enter, smirking, “Hey there babe,” he greeted, taking a gulp of the tequila, nose wrinkling at the taste. “Fuck this is strong. I don’t have any chaser. C’mere.”

Am I not enough pt. 3

HERE IS PART 3 OF MY PCY STORY PT 4 COMING SOON! HOPE YOU GUYS LIKE IT!

Chanyeol’s POV

“Oh are you serious? I knew this would happen hyung. You love her. You need to ask her on a date” Sehun said poking Baekhyun on the chest. “I don’t know guys. She is just so nice and once she cares for you she gives her all so you can feel it. But I’m not sure if Its love or not.” He said looking at me. “Hey why are you looking at me?” I said shoving him a little. “ No reason. But do you guys think I should ask her on a date?I don’t know if she feels the same way. I don’t even know what I’m feeling.” “Baek you should go for it! She obviously likes you enough to hang out with an annoying person like you” Sehun said teasingly. “No!” I said immediately regretting it. “I mean, you two just met.” “Hyung you sound jealous!” “Would you stop speaking such non sense Sehun. I can’t stand to look at her let alone like her. I lied.


You were waiting for Baekhyun by the main entrance of school. Things were normal now. At first spending so much time with him made you uncomfortable but it soon passed as you found out how funny and childish he was. You felt like you could be yourself. “Hey I’m ready lets get going” Baekhyun said while looping his arm around yours. You were getting ready to go into the movie theater when you noticed that he wasn’t his usual self. “Are you ok? You seem off? Did the boys do something to you?” He shook his head. “It’s nothing to worry about. Come on we should go in” he said pulling you towards the movie hall.
During the movie Baekhyun kept shifting in his seat, moving closer to you. During some scary scenes you noticed he held onto your hand tighter and didn’t let go like he usually would. Your heart started pounding in your chest. Did this mean what you thought it did.


YPOV

Does Baek like me? No why would he like a girl like me. Well I guess it’s only natural and I do feel like something in me has grown for him. “Now you’re acting weird” he said as he threw a piece of popcorn in the air to catch with his mouth. “No, it’s just I have a test tomorrow and I don’t know if I’ll pass” I lied. “Hey ____ we’re here” he said while waving a hand in front of your face. I had been lost in thought that I didn’t notice we were in front of my house. I laughed nervously “Thanks for the movie Baek. My treat next time.” “Okay I’ll take your word on it.” I nodded. “Umm well I’ll go inside. See you tomorrow Baek. Sleep well okay.” But as a turned I felt his hand on my wrist.

His lips were soft and plump. You felt redness creep to your face. You didn’t know how to react so You just followed his movements. He pulled away “ I’m sorry, I just have been wanting to do that all day.” He was blushing beyond belief looking down at his feet. “It’s okay. Don’t worry about it. I have to go. I’ll see you tomorrow okay.” You ran to your door leaving a confused Baekhyun on the street.
The next morning was a tough one. You hadn’t gotten any sleep. Baekhyuns kiss had lingered on your lips all night. Making you blush every time you thought about it. It was the first time you kissed someone and it felt special but you weren’t sure if this is what real loves kiss felt like. Now you had a million questions for him and he wasn’t waiting for you by the entrance. Did he not what to see you anymore? You thought.

Baekhyun’s POV

I kissed her. I actually kissed her. I couldn’t stop thinking about it all night. I’m running late now and what if ____ is waiting for me already? Even worse , what if she thinks I don’t want to talk to her now. The truth is the kiss didn’t clear much for me. I didn’t feel fireworks when it happened but I do feel something for her I’m just not sure what it is.


School was over and you hadn’t seen Baekhyun all day. Sehun had told you he had to stay in detention for being late this morning. You decided to give it one last chance. If he didn’t show up at the front that meant he didn’t want to talk to you. You started to worry 5 minutes had passed since the bell had rung and he wasn’t there yet.


Baekhyun’s POV

“How was detention hyung?” “Sehun can you shut up” I screamed at him. “Calm down Baek, what got into you today” Chanyeol said while holding my shoulder. “Sorry guys I’m stressed with finals plus I think I messed up things between _____ and I. I kissed her last night.” “That’s s great thing hyung! Why are you so worried? Did she slap you. Did you not like it?” Sehun was standing right next to me now, trying to get all the information out of me. “I’ll see you guys later I’m going to go see her ” I waved.


“____!” You heard from behind you. You turned around and there he was smiling at you. You were relieved he still wanted to be you friend. “Hey Baek! I haven’t seen you all day.” “I know. You missed me right” he said in a cocky voice. You nodded. “Do you want to go to the arcade? “Sure lets go.” Things seem to be normal for the rest of the day until you two were standing in front of a machine as Baekhyun was trying to win you a stuffed Hello Kitty. “____ do you like me?” He said still looking at the machine. You blushed “Of course I do, you’re my best friend.” He turned around, Hello Kitty in hand. “Look yesterday was kind of weird for me and I don’t know my exact feelings.” “I feel the same way, in reality you were the first boy I ever kissed.” You said while blushing. Baekhyun’s eyes widened in surprise. “I’m sorry I would have never wanted to take that away from you for my selfish needs.” “Baek it’s okay. I’m not sad because at least it was with someone who cares for me. Even if it isn’t in that way.” Your eyes teared up. He held your hand. “If it’s okay with you I would like to see if there is anything between us maybe go on a couple real dates?” “Yes.” You smiled and nodded. He hugged you tight and then held your hand in his as you walked together to play more games.

Chanyeol’s POV

“Woah hyung get over here! They have all these new machines! Let’s play them all!” Sehun ran to the machines shoving coins into them. I walked behind him. I couldn’t get the image of Baekhyun and ____ kissing. Just thinking about it made my blood boil. I can’t believe this. I have to be stupid or else why would I be jealous. “Chanyeol are you okay? You haven’t been yourself since Baek met-” he nodded. “Wait a minute, you have been weird since Baek told us he kissed ____. And you acted all jealous yesterday too! Do you like her too?” He said while stopping his game. “I think I caught feelings for her.” I couldn’t help but blush. My feelings were finally catching up to me. I couldn’t hide them anymore. “Well hyung you should tell Baek or ____ before he catches real feelings for her.” I nodded and smiled a little. Would she even want to talk to me after what I put her through? “Look they’re over there right now” Sehun said while pointing to the prize machines. “Wish me good luck” I said as I walked to them. *“If it’s okay with you I would like to see if there is anything between us maybe go on a couple real dates?” “Yes.” * I felt the pain in my chest this time stronger. I didn’t realize how much I liked her until the pain in my chest made me fall to my knees. Tears running down my cheeks. “Hyung are you alright?” Sehun was at my side trying to pick me up. I shook my head. “I’ve lost her to him. And it’s all because of me.”

anotherfemhiroblog asked:

Alternate

7, cafe au

“Have you decided on your order yet?” The waiter asked, smiling. He was generally good with the customers,mostly because he was what people called a tease. Even the boys he could get to give him high tips.
“And may I say you are looking gorgeous today.” He winked at her, “care for my number?” Usually they blushed and turned him down, but sometimes he could get a girl - or guy, to agree and take it. Sometimes they even called it and he got a date out of it.

(xxx)

He glanced over it for a moment, before he took a look at Kori. He didn’t know what to expect; whether she was topless, or had a shirt on, even her bra– it still caught him off-guard. He took another glance at it, before he tossed it back.

“Nah, keep it. Looks better on you than it ever did me.”

“If you insist.” From shirtless, Koriand'r pulled the t-shirt back on again, warming back into the soft fabric. Guy clothing could always be so much more comfortable, like their pants not having ridiculous/insulting fake pockets. Who even gave anyone the right to give female jeans fake pockets? She really hated it and never quite understood why anyone would ever need fake, crappy pockets. X'hal, humans.

“If you ever want the shirt back, then just tell me,” she told him, grabbing her hair from under the shirt and neatly yanking it out, letting the strands and strands of red fall where they pleased.

So GoT season 5 premiere recap:

- Cersei hates everyone but her wine

- Tyrion is so done with that fucking crate, also give him that wine

- I think Jamie is just overall a very sad panda

- What kind of world does a man live in that he can’t even let his guard down in a brothel and get some honest cuddles

- Brienne doesn’t want a damn squire and also life sucks

- Sansa’s life is actually looking up except that whole being stuck with creepy creeper Little Finger. Also Robin is still pathetic

- Everyone is disagreeing/mad at Dany including her fire breathing dragons

- So many naked men and their bootys

- The Free Folk are not having a good time while staying at the wall

- Jon Snow knows nothing still but how to show compassion and piss people off

- Creepy witch lady is way too into human bonfires

Total Kill Count: 2

Naked Men Count: 3

Naked Lady Count: 2

I think that about covers it! See you guys next week