I do not care what men think about feminism. I am so apathetic that I almost did not write this post. However, men on tumblr/in real life keep asking me about this topic.
I will give this my best shot. This is what I want male “allies” to understand.
1. Female socialization is TRAUMATIZING! Socialization in a capitalist society is always traumatizing, but it is worse for people who were born and raised female because the primary purpose of it is to groom women into a submissive role. The “feminine” role was created by patriarchy in order to control women’s reproductive capabilities. The “feminine” role exists so that men can control women. It humiliates women and robs them of their humanity. Women are not given access to knowledge and skills that would help them become more independent. In many societies that have more rights for women on paper, these roles are maintained through popular culture and pornography. It hurts and it never really goes away. If you try and escape your socialization, you suffer social and financial consequences.
2. Makeup, dresses, ect. are not something women naturally enjoy. I mean, I am sure many women enjoy the social approval that comes along with wearing them. But most people would prefer to wear comfortable clothing!
3. There is no “female brain” or “female” intuition, however there are specific experiences that are the result of female socialization. It is not that women are inherently different, it is that we were trained to be submissive. We see a warped vision of ourselves in society.
4. NO YOU DO NOT UNDERSTAND! NO THAT ONE EXPERIENCE YOU HAD THAT WAS SORT OF KIND OF LIKE A “FEMALE EXPERIENCE” IS NOT THE SAME. NO! NO!
5. Female socialization starts from birth, parents and doctors treat male and female children differently. Even kind, well-meaning parents and doctors cannot escape the subtle sexism that permeates every major society on this planet. Most of the time, sexism is considered “harmless” or “natural”.
Respect our pain and our desire to heal! If you learn anything from feminism, it should be that you will never understand our pain. Don’t try to relate to us! However, you should fight capitalism and patriarchy! I think that public organizing around political issues (stuff that goes before the government)should remain co-ed, but all private discussions and organizing should remain women-only.
So yeah, do what you want with this…