So last night my hips were really sore and stiff so I took an anti-inflammatory and then waited for it to kick in before taking my sleeping tablets.

Queue actual insanity.

I don’t remember much of last night, but what I do remember is fucking weird. So, I got myself a glass of ‘rum and coke’. Only I didn’t pour out any rum, despite the fact I seriously remember pouring the rum. And then I decided it would be a fantastic idea to add a spoonful of paprika into the ‘rum and coke’. 

Then I got into a conversation with a guy in North Carolina about cucumbers and the cucumber who rules over Ireland, Our Supreme Overlord Cucumber, who ousted Emperor Potato so he could ban the eating of other cucumbers. He now resides over his cupboard of salad ingredients. 

And then I was singing along to songs on youtube at the top of my voice. 

So, anti-inflammatory meds and sleeping meds party anyone?

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Talking about learning history in primary school today and I remembered when we were doing the 1916 Easter Rising, I used to get a lot of shit during the break times for being born in England.

But when we finally got to the part when the British drove a warship down the Liffey in Dublin and shelled O’Connell Street, my teacher turned to me and asked “Well, Dominique? What do you think of that?” And eleven year old me said “well I don’t have a warship.”

I still don’t have a warship.

waiting in the social welfare office and they’re taking ages

are they gathering information on me

I knew I shouldn’t have bought that dvd

theyprobably know I like koka noodles raw now

Oh god I’m sorry I stole that skittles pack when I was six

I’m sorry I skipped every phys/chem class I had

I’M SORRYYYYYYYY

"Is this Legal Aid?"

Just answered the door and the dude outside looked at me and said “Is this an apartment? We’re looking for Legal Aid…” 

I look down at myself in a Spidey onsie and I was so fucking tempted to say “Yes you’re at the right place come on in.”

Of course this is a fucking apartment. Surprisingly, I would not go to work in a fucking Spider-Man onsie. 

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