Bleach characters at a Renaissance Fair

Author’s choice list. :)

This is what might happen if Bleach characters attended a Renaissance Fair! 

1. Ishida: Makes elaborate period costumes for himself and all of his friends

Ishida: Please note my awesome cape.

Ishida: My bag is full of spares.

Orihime: Look at how pretty the dress Ishida made for you is, Rukia! I think he still has a thing for you!

Rukia: But seriously how does he know my size?

Ichigo: I think my costume looks a little weird.

Ishida: Kurosaki, WHY are you wearing your sword on your HEAD?

Ichigo: I assumed that’s how you wanted it to be.

Ishida: TAKE IT OFF!

2. Rukia: Gets really into faux-archaic speech

Rukia: Dost thou wish to eateth some hot dogs, fair Inoue?

Orihime: I doth!

Ichigo: I am so walking 15 steps behind you guys so nobody knows I know you.

3. Kenpachi: Misunderstands the nature of the swordplay demonstrations

Kenpachi: The fuck is this?

Kenpachi: You people aren’t even drawing blood.

Kenpachi: Worst fight ever.

4. Ikkaku: Carries around a real sword

Renji: Real swords really aren’t allowed in the human world, dude.

Ikkaku: What are you talking about! There are swords EVERYWHERE around here!

5. Unohana: Is disappointed in the food offerings

Unohana: This so-called turkey leg is dry and uninspiring.

Unohana: I could cook much, much better meat.

6. Riruka: Spends all her time shopping for trinkets

Riruka: Blown glass can be super adorable.

Riruka: Good to know. 

7. Kyoraku: Makes friends with all the drunken, big-bosomed ladies

Kyoraku: Best event EVER!

Nanao: The ONE time he takes me with him…

8. Matsumoto: Rents a costume

Kira: You look great, Rangiku. Where’s Hisagi?

Matsumoto: Considering the corset I’m wearing, I assume he’s still passed out!

9. Aizen: Wears fairy wings

Aizen: BUTTERFLY wings

Gin: That won’t make anybody snigger less, Aizen-sama.

10. James: Spends his entire time at the joust


Mask de Masculine: I’m beginning to feel hurt

11. Jackie: Keeps accidentally activating her fullbring

Jackie: Is it my fault that there is mud EVERYWHERE?

12. Byakuya: Watches the puppet shows

Renji: You’re imagining Admiral Seawed in a Renaissance puppet show now, aren’t you, Captain?

Byakuya: Yes.

13. Nelliel: Has the best centaur-cosplay anyone has ever seen

Nelliel: Think I’ll win the costume contest?

Ichigo: I’m pretty sure that’s cheating!

14. Nnoitra: Spends the whole day at the axe-throwing booth


15. Grimmjow: Ends up in the stocks

Grimmjow: I’m sorry, but if you call yourself “king” you gotta EXPECT a challenge!


Grimmjow: Could somebody let me out now?

Bleach characters' New Year's Resolutions: The Sequel

As requested by anon. :)

It is officially a tradition for my New Year’s Resolutions posts to appear in mid-September. Seriously. The first one I did was posted Sept. 17. This one is posting Sept. 15. September is New Year’s for this blog, I guess. Or something. Anyway, it is once again time to find out what sorts of promises Bleach characters made to themselves this year!

Kira: To appear in the manga - or at least be mentioned.

Grimmjow: To appear in the manga - with my actual face.

Ryuken: To appear in the manga - so that my son learns what it is to be a successful non-evil Quincy. 

Riruka: Same as every year - to seek out, find, and obtain cute things wherever they may be!

Riruka: And to continue to be clean and cute myself!

Yukio: I’d resolve to play more video games, but I’m not sure that’s physically possible.

Yukio: I guess I’ll go with something easy like “make lots more money.”

As Nodt: To become less lonely.

As Nodt: Possibly by finding some inner strength that I did not know I had.

As Nodt: Or, failing that, buying a goldfish. 

Soi Fon: I resolve to kill my enemies and execute my duties as an officer of the Gotei-13.

Omaeda: Great one, Captain! Me too!

Soi Fon: No, Omaeda, they are supposed to be realistic.

Isshin: I resolve to finally tell Toshiro and Rangiku where I’ve been all this time!

Isshin: Maybe. If I feel like it.

Rose: I resolve to make Izuru smile, at least once!

Nanao: I will read a book every week, turn in all of my reports on time, and participate in a fight with my actual zanpakuto.

Kyoraku: Or maybe just the first two?

Unohana: I resolve……to not become a zombie.

Kurotsuchi: I resolve to make as many zombies as is humanly possible using everyone who is dead or near-dead or taking an inconvenient nap.


Unohana: I sure hope I’ve been cremated already. 

Apacci: I resolve to finally rescue Halibel-sama from prison!

Mila Rose: I resolve to rescue her first!

Sung-Sun: I resolve to actually rescue her when both of you are too busy arguing to do so.

Shinji: I resolve to actually win a fight.

Shinji: Or an minor altercation.

Shinji: Or an argument.

Shinji: Hell at this point I would settle for winning Solitaire.

Kenpachi: Same as every year - to fight Kurosaki Ichigo again! 

Soul King: To meet, woo, and marry Kurosaki Ichigo!

Candice: To be the one who kills Kurosak Ichigo!!!


Ichigo: Gonna be a busy year for me.