um.. so.. the friend I am staying with yeah? well her family is coming over during the first week of october. (her father, mother and brother). so there won’t be room for me here during that time. I told her not to worry and that I’ll make myself scarce during that time. I might have smiled and laughed it off when she apologized for it, but the truth is I am freaking out.
I know she would never outright tell me to leave otherwise, but I feel so much like a charity case and I hate being a charity case. Even worse, I feel like a bum. I keep feeling like she is already growing tired of me, the longer I am staying here and it is bound to get worse if I don’t get a job and a work permit soon, so that I can move out and get my own flat. I can’t afford hotels. especially since I am not getting any job offers.
I am so scared and I don’t know what to do.
I feel like I should just go back to India, beg forgiveness and just marry whomever my family wants me to marry.