And I’m in love with Dave Rygalski. He’s my guy, not Young Chui. Young Chui is a ship in the night, Mama. Not even a ship. He’s a little tugboat tooting along. And I’m not going to the prom with him. Uh-uh. I’m going with Dave. Because we rock together, Mama. The charade is over!
Okay…I think I’m gonna cry. All of you know that the character Lane Kim was based on Amy Sherman-Palladino’s best friend, Helen Pai, right? (the one whose name they anagrammed to get “Hep Alien”) Well, do you guys know what Helen Pai’s husband’s name is?
His name is Dave Rygalski, and he wrote for the Jay Leno show.
And I’m going to go cry now. Because Lane and Dave were supposed to live happily ever after. He was supposed to be the man she married. It’s not supposition; it’s not wishful thinking…it’s what was intended to be.
A few weeks ago you told me that Lane had a crush on me. Well, I have a crush on her, too. Now, I know you have very strict rules about dating and boys, but I just want you to know that I’m a good person. I don’t smoke, I don’t drink, I’ve never gotten a ticket, I’m healthy, I take care of myself, I floss. I never watch more than 30 minutes of television a night partly because I think it’s a waste of time and partly because there’s nothing on. I respect my parents, I do well in school, I never play video games in case they do someday prove that playing them can turn you into a serial killer. I don’t drink coffee. I hate soda because the carbonation freaks me out. I’m happy to give up meat if you feel strongly about it. I don’t mind wearing a tie. I enjoy playing those hymns on my guitar, and I really, really want to take your daughter to the prom.