before the beginning, after the great war between Heaven and Hell, God created the Earth and gave dominion over it to the crafty ape he called man. and to each generation was born a creature of light and a creature of darkness. and great armies clashed by night in the ancient war between good and evil. there was magic then, nobility, and unimaginable cruelty. and so it was until the day that a false sun exploded over Trinity, and man forever traded away wonder for reason.
You know what I love about apple pie a la mode? Where the warm, crunchy crust comes together with the smooth, frozen ice cream. And in about five minutes, all the ice cream melts and becomes a warm soupy mess. When that happens… we’re leaving. So you got five minutes to decide if you’re gonna change your life, or if I’m taking you to jail.