In a new essay for Yahoo! Parenting, a white father details a partial list of things that he can take for granted but that will likely be problematic for his bi-racial son.
The essay’s author, Calvin Hennick, says he doesn’t want to give his children a complex about the inequalities he believes they will face in life, but he also wants to prepare them for the road ahead.
“I can’t eliminate all the unfair hurdles that exist in the world,” he writes. “I can only do my best to raise kids who are able to jump over them.”
1. I Can Walk Through a Store Without Being Followed
To take one high-profile instance, Macy’s and the city of New York recently settled with actor Robert Brown, who was handcuffed, humiliated, and accused of committing credit card fraud after buying an expensive watch at the store.
I never have to worry about this happening to me.
2. I Can Succeed Without It Being Attributed to My Race
When my wife, who is black, received her acceptance letter from Boston College, a peer told her she must have gotten in due to affirmative action, effectively ruining the experience of receiving the letter.
3. I Learned About My Ancestors’ History in School
I can tell you all about Louis XIV, Socrates, and the Magna Carta, but I always wondered when we would finally learn about African history (beyond Pharaohs and pyramids). The subject never came up.
4. I Can Lose My Temper in Traffic
Once, an acquaintance who got into a confrontation while driving told me how scared she was of the other driver, describing him as a “big black guy.” When I get heated, no one attributes it to my race.
5. I Can Loiter in Wealthy Neighborhoods
No one has ever called the cops on me to report a “suspicious person.” My wife can’t say the same.
6. I Can Complain About Racism
When I point out that black people are incarcerated at alarming rates, or largely forced to send their children to underperforming schools, or face systemic discrimination when searching for jobs and housing, no one accuses me of “playing the race card.”
7. I Can Count on Being Met on My Own Terms
If I’m being treated poorly, I don’t stop and think about whether it’s due to my race. But unless we somehow make a giant leap forward, my son will always have to wonder.
****Really great read !