This is partly true. Although I have 0% of an idea how the fuck you found out. However, I’m willing to share if you are willing to listen.
I’ll start by explaining who my friend is: My best friend Kelsey (I’m not using last names purely for her families privacy because she did have a tumblr and she is reasonably well-known/ popular) was a beautiful young woman. Long, black hair, bright grey eyes, pale skin, with freckles and the most stunning imperfections I have ever seen. She was always so kind and honest and straight forward about everything and you were never left in the lurch about how she felt about you/ certain situations. She was the most generous person I have ever met in my entire life and if you know who I’m talking about then you should be very thankful for what she has blessed upon your life. She was one of those people who was always strong for other people, whether you were struggling with depression or even if you had lost your favourite lipstick, she would be strong for you. This may seem lovely, however it didn’t seem to aid her or work in her favour. She had struggled with what her counsellor called “a potent mix of bipolar disorder, schizophrenia, Obsessive Compulsive Disorder and depression” for over 6 years of her life. When she first started listening to 5SOS, she told me, “this band is incredible. They’re so talented and young and inspirational. And one day, you’re going to be just like them babe! Successful and doing what you love, making people happy with your music.” We’re both singers and used to sing at school assemblies/ performance nights, yet she had so little faith in her self and so much faith in me. She would tell me everyday how inspired she was and invigorated she was by 5SOS to make a change to her life and fight through the pain she was struggling with. She told me they inspired her to stop self-harming, stop beating herself up about things that didn’t matter and focus on the here and now. I was proud of her, but I didn’t manage to tell her within enough time. On the 18th July, 2014 something in her had changed. I called her in the morning screaming, “KELS KELS KELS! IT’S 3 DAYS UNTIL WE CAN BUY OUR 5SOS TICKETS AND FINALLY GET TO THANK THEM FOR EVERYTHING THEY’VE DONE FOR US!” and she replied with, “I know you’re going to enjoy it. I love you so much Rebecca. Please don’t forget how much I love you. No matter what, I always will; you’re my best friend and my sister. I love you, I love you, I love you.” “I love you too babe! Are you okay? You’re acting a little strange!” It was kind of silent for awhile. “Yeah. I have to go now though. I love you. Good bye” “I love you too Kelsey. Bye. Talk to you later” and then I hung up. My friends and family still ask me if I knew that was going to be the last phone call we ever had, if I knew what was to come and all I can reply with is, “I wish I knew.” Because on this date, she decided that her beautiful soul could not handle the stress of this world and she ended her life. I found out that same night. And amongst all the crying and shaking and screaming, I sat with her parents in silence. I didn’t know what had happened. I couldn’t process it. I felt numb. I felt lost. Broken. Terrified. My rock had gone, somewhere I didn’t know where. She didn’t leave letters, notes- nothing. I didn’t know what to do. However, I knew Kelsey wouldn’t have wanted us to mourn for too long, it would’ve made her angry so I thought it was best to work on making her exit out of this world as incredible and graceful as her. I won’t explain the funeral because I don’t think it’s necessary however, her funeral was beautiful just like her. It was on the 21st July, the same day the ROWYSO tour tickets went on sale. I missed the pre-sale and normal ticket sale. I knew Kelsey would’ve wanted me to go, but I felt like it was pointless. I still hadn’t cried over her death yet and I was so scared and numb that I didn’t know what to feel. But we didn’t get tickets. I couldn’t get tickets for her. I couldn’t tell the boys what they meant to us, to her. It pains me so much every single day that such an amazing and incredible woman, with so much beauty and promise, couldn’t thank her idols for keeping her on this earth for as long as they did. It’s no-one’s fault that this happened. I don’t and she never blamed anyone. It was her choice because she felt like she had none. It pains me so much. She idolised them unconditionally. Their music kept her strong for as long as it possibly could. I’m sorry this was so sappy. So, now i don’t have tickets to share Kelsey’s story with them.
I love you Kelsey. I’m so sorry I wasn’t strong enough for the both of us. You are still my angel and my guiding light and I will work hard every day to try and meet those boys and tell them how much they meant to you.
I’m so sorry to my followers for this.