Just the truth.
I saw a post similar to this from shecouldfitbetweentheraindrops not too long ago, and it really inspired me to follow up on this post I have been wanting to write.
If you claim things and think you have a disorder, it’s most likely not too accurate. “I’m suicidal, I must have borderline, etc” for example. “I get angered easily, I must have borderline.”
People who actually have it for the most part do not go throwing it around. They don’t ‘want’ it, nor do they label themselves like that, nor do they just look it up and assume. It’s a huge struggle. Not to mention you literally can’t “self diagnose.”
It’s important for people to understand that you don’t have to have a disorder to struggle. Having a depression disorder and dealing with depression are different, having mood change struggles and having bipolar is different, and so on. It doesn’t mean you don’t need help or treatment. It doesn’t invalidate you. You don’t “need” one, nor should you want one. It’s sort of like a smack in the face towards those who do have it if you just go around thinking or claiming you have it just because you’re struggling.
Looking at criteria and self-diagnosing will almost always be wrong. Simply, those are guidelines. Professionals really know what it’s about, how deep it can go, and take into consideration age, other struggles, other disorders, medical issues, hormone issues, maybe a drug/food reaction, etc etc. Professionals diagnose. Professionals know the difference, they are professionals.
If you look at the symptoms of cancer, for example, it says fatigue, weight loss, and so on. I have struggles with those things, and going around saying I have cancer would be pretty much the same as someone going around saying they have BPD or some other disorder because they can relate to it. That’s how it looks to many others, people who have it and a disorder, and professionals. BPD is a chronic disorder and is born, for one.
I am not discouraging someone to seek help, not at all. I highly encourage people to seek help. Do not suffer in silence. Disorder or not, pretty much everyone deserves help! Just know self diagnosing is actually pretty insulting, and I’ve seen lots actually seem like they “want it” or think it’s something unique. Some have wanted attention. Others seriously assume they do.
Not saying you’re not allowed to have suspicions. I won’t pull out the possibility of someone being undiagnosed or misdiagnosed and them thinking they might, I know shit can happen! .… I know people can research and really really understand- I know not everyone can get diagnosed- it doesn’t magically mean you do or don’t have something- especially not being able to afford, but most people who think they have it or think they understand, don’t. While if I were a doctor and would value someones thought of just what they can relate to if they mention anything at all as it can help gain an understanding, and it is important to not just think “they have no input at all”… I’d still be really suspicious of someone that comes in and throws a self diagnosis at me. Like, what?
Lots don’t see it’s not simply a list of feelings or behaviors one has had before, it’s a list of severe symptoms. Things are so broad and complex in BPD specifically, most wouldn’t understand the difference and pattern and severity and the differences in disorders and all. Not to mention it is a chronic disorder, not just a personality quirk.|
Plus with disorders, lacking insight is a hallmark. Lots don’t realize their behavior, especially in BPD. Or they don’t see it all.
"So I looked at the criteria and can relate, so I think I have it."
No, it is more than that.
I have explained my disorder to some and I have had the, “Oh well I felt that before so I might it” reaction. I’ve seen that on here a lot too. Like no, you haven’t. People don’t get it.
Self harm isn’t an accurate way to determine as self harm isn’t “required” for any mental disorder, nor is one by itself.
Being insecure and fearing abandonment/rejection is not an accurate way to determine it on your own. It is SO much more than that.
Being impulsive doesn’t mean you have borderline, especially depending on other influences, age, and just your flat out personality.
Being sensitive and then hypersensitivity in BPD are different.
Unstable relationships on its own is CERTAINLY not just BPD. It can just happen as a result of symptoms, but even that isn’t guaranteed.
Emptiness can occur in other disorders and individuals, but they may not understand the pattern or severity.
And soooo on.
It’s just completely inaccurate and wrong to self-diagnose. Specifically using BPD examples here. Not to mention tests can actually be done for BPD and the symptoms have to be long lasting, interfere with everyday life and “not just happen when convenient or something happens” etc.
You’re incorrectly “diagnosing” and assuming an actual disorder
You can’t literally diagnose yourself!
Not to mention self diagnosing can actually be dangerous.
I hope I made this clear where my heart is and that people realize it is very important to realize what it is, that it can be insulting, that it’s an actual disorder not just a list of things, and that being biased towards either side without stating other things is rude too. This is the truth. No need to get nasty about it. I included all I could to try to get others to understand what this is about.